When did you first go out...

[Polly D]

...post (first) baby? Having seen pics of Coleen Rooney today (I didn't buy the Daily Mail, honest, I just loitered in Smiths), I see she went out til 2am - apparently - when baby Rooney was only 10 days old. I'm NOT slating her at all, I think good on her, but I was quite amazed 'cos when my bubba was 10 days old I could barely muster up the energy to stop booing into my tissue and have a shower, only to put clean pajamas on.

[Dulwich Born And Bred]

I think that is too soon personally but alas that is my view . My son is 9 weeks and I am still not ready to part company with him yet. When he was 10 days old, I could barely walk never mind go to a concert and a bar!

[KatsuQueen]

Wow, she went "out" out! I only went outside when Mini Katsu was about 10 days old, just to get some fresh air. I only walked around the block! I remember feeling really rubbish though, because my NCT mates were meeting up for coffees and gadding about in parks etc. Whereas I was just so exhausted, leaving the flat was an event for me.

[Pickle]

My son was about 3 months old before Mr Pickle and I tentatively ventured to Lordship Lane one evening for dinner - we were home within a couple of hours and I worried the whole time, even though knew he was sound asleep and being babysat by very good friends. Wild horses wouldn't have dragged me out of the house when he was only 9 days old, goodness only knows how she did it!

[Belle]

KatsuQueen - i was exactly the same, and even now when I see friends on Facebook bobbing around having coffees with 4 day old babies I just can't relate. I remember walking to the end of the street to try out the pram and feeling v wobbly. And then had loads of doctor's appts and things around 2 weeks and felt sea-sick going that far! however me and mr belle managed a meal out (at Franklins which is about 5 mins from where we live!) at about six weeks, wasn't exactly larging it but was nice. Must admit - sounds awful - but I never felt bad about leaving my boy, perhaps because we were lucky that the first few times was with our parents. It's not that I'd have not been able to leave him at 10 days it's more I'd definitely not have had the energy...

[Yorkie]

I didn't leave the house for 3 weeks and then it was only because I had to go to baby clinic. Am sure the Health Visitor made me go to get baby weighed as she knew I'd not been out. I felt such a sense of achievement that I'd made it across the park! A week or so later I called my sister excitedly "I'm out on my own" I told her. "Where's baby?" she said. I realized then that on my "own" meant me and baby...

I have a big soft spot for Colleen and thought it was great that she had her son in her local NHS hospital.

[ryedalema]

Fair play to her (Colleen), but I'm guessing she might have some full time help enabling her to be a bit more 'free'. What I can't compute is the physical side of leaving a baby for the evening at that age. My boobs would have felt like concrete if I'd tried to do that. Plus the sleep deprivation and resulting energy trough stuff wouldn't exactly have made me the life and soul etc. I went out for the first time with Madame at 2-3 days old, to the breastfeeding cafe on Barry road, but only because I was worried that I wasn't feeding her enough. I remember my husband dropping me off outside and me carrying her in the car seat - I felt soooo vulnerable, like someone was going to grab her from me and run off with her. Then three weeks later we made a family trip to France for a week's holiday. What a nightmare! Unless you've experienced motorised expressing under a muslin in the front seat of the family car while your husband races up the French freeway for the ferry (for which we were very late) you've not experienced degradation on my book! :)

I know celebs have to maintain a profile to keep the money rollng in etc but, y'know, sometimes you can let finances take a back seat can't you? I don't expect they are very near the breadline!?

[snowboarder]

'Out' out? I haven't really been out and baby is 7 months!! Went out for dinner when bubs was about 3 months, and the odd occasion since but b'feeding and constant waking is somewhat limiting...and tiresome for babysitters!

[Keef]

Our baby is 6 and a half months, and Mrs Keef is hoping to come to my gig for an hour or 2 next week. That will a her first time "out".

[carrieon23]

At 10 days I hadn't had more than an hour and half sleep at one time and felt and looked like i'd been run over by a truck!

I went outside the next day -completely in denial of what had happened to me. Got halfway down lordship lane, and nearly passed out! If nothing else, the fact that I couldn't sit without a haemmoroid ring for 2 weeks would have probably stopped me from going 'out' Not the most attractive accessory on an evening out!

I didn't want to go out out for months, didn't really want to burst our little family bubble. When we finally got encouraged to go out for dinner we were away for a maximum of two hours, I checked my phone about 100 times and all we talked about was the baby!

I mean good on her but it does seem like such an effort so early on. She must have help and can't be breatfeeding or she would have exploded!!

[ratty]

about 3 weeks old, we sat in the Bishop for about 2 hours whilst baby Jack was sleeping and with his Auntie.

[The Nappy Lady]

If she was out because she wanted to be then fair play to her, I just hope she wasn't out because she felt under pressure to be. I can't begin to imagine what pressure some of these celebs must feel, on top of coping with Motherhood in general, to know people are also waiting to get a photo of you the minute you step out the door, get images of post baby flab / yawning etc. etc.

Personally, having had 35 years to go out and party (well actually not quite, but let's say the the 20 years from 15 to 35 years old) I was more than happy to embrace Motherhood and spend my evenings at home with a good book or the TV and my other half for company once the girls are tucked up in bed. We also do quite a lot of socialising at home....neighbours over for meals and card games (can't beat a good bitchy hand of Uno!!). With no. 1 I first went out to the theatre on Boxing Night when she would have been 5 months old, then again to a Christmas party the following week, then later with the other Mummy pals when she was about 8 or 9 months old I think (can't really remember). She was a really good sleeper though reliably 7am to 7pm from 3 months old. With no. 2 I still haven't gone out at night and she is now 13 months....it isn't that I can't, or haven't had the opportunity, I just don't feel the need, plus she's been a much lighter sleeper - always knew we couldn't get that lucky twice!! so the prospect of being up with her at 5am having rolled in at 1am etc. just does not appeal to me. I have however had a day at The Sanctuary in Covent Garden (bliss), for me that was much better value.

I think the EDM's night out will be very good for me, I know I need to go out again and remind myself about why it is fun, though on days like today I'm very happy to be curled up at home with the fire....

Molly

[Steph]

Good Luck to her..From what you read/see on the TV, I would guess both her and Wayne are both really close to their families and probably left the baby with a well capable mum. It's very family orientated in Liverpool.

After 9 months of being pregnant and if you feel up to it with the knowledge your baby is totally safe I personally would of jumped at the chance.

I didn't go out for a while with when my wee one was born but I have 10 and more years on her. She's only early 20's so it's probably not much of an effort at all for her to get her glad rags on and hit the town. I raise my glass (indoors)to her.

[clux]

i went out, as in outside to the shops/library/cafe etc, when my two were both a couple of days old. did lunch in the pub at a week old, but even now when they're 4 and nearly 2 i don't go out at night much!

[Steph]

is that because you don't like going out? Have no one to help you out babysitting, or the next day with a hangover? Or, purely because you don't like leaving kids?

If I had a decent babysitter, family say, I would love to go out once a week, just for dinner even or to the cinema. Sadly that's one of the downfalls for me of being in London..Not enough babysitters that I wholly trust and the lack of ?10million to help me out as per the Roony's.

[????]

I think Steph makes a good point about extended families - I suspect many people in London don't live near mum's, dad's etc and so don't have that opportunity. We never had with ours but my sister lived near my mum and dad when hers were young and got a lot of support. I've some mates at home who have never really missed on big occasions other mates weddings/ big parties etc because they have closer (physically) families and the tradition is more that the extended family do a lot of caring.

We went out after about 6 weekish?. We also went to a wedding in Portsmouth 2 days after our first was born which was a scary thing to do but in hindsight fantastic as we then were not worried about going out locally - at all. My missus also had a natural birth with no complications so she was up and about after a few hours.

From a male perspective - the scariest thing for me was when my missus went on a hen do and I was left for 4 days with our 10 month old in Spain as we lived there then, I was absolutely crapping myself but it gave me a lot of confidence! She left a lot of lists.

Each to their own but at the other extreme I know a few couples who haven't left their kids after 2+ years which can't be good I feel - for kids or relationships!

[clux]

Steph Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> is that because you don't like going out? Have no

> one to help you out babysitting, or the next day

> with a hangover? Or, purely because you don't like

> leaving kids?

>

Not sure if you were asking me that, but its a combination of all the above. Don't have any family in london, other than a sister who has two little ones of her own and lives on the other side of london. I can no longer drink without having a horrific hangover which kind of ruins the fun of it. I used to love going out and would happily go out every night but i guess things just change. the thought of going out to a club or something now fills me with dread! don't even really have the stamina to stay out in a pub till midnight very often either!

[Coach Beth]

I went out with my baby to 'Mon Peit Chou' when he was a couple days old - with my partner and friends. Felt extremely wobbly but it felt good to be outsid and sitting down once I got to the cafe!

[ludoscotts]

We went out with the baby at 4 days old- was only going to go down to lordship lane but it took so much effort and bag packing etc to get ready that I said lets just go into town and get the visiting work thing out of the way, so at 4 days old Ella went backstage at Mary Poppins and Lord of the rings(where hubby and I were both working) down Oxford street, into macdonalds and into the pub that we used to drink in in covent garden. Was la lovely thing to do as everyone got to see her when She was tiny and I think I got over my fear of going out very quickly. Did spend the next day crying all day so think it took it out of me!

was also a good thing to do as she was only 3 weeks old when we had to get the train to durham for christmas which was a huge journey with a 3 weeks old!

the first time we went out in the evening was that trip away and we went for a couple of drinks with friends on christmas eve.

just dont push yourself you will know when you are ready to go out and face the world and a lot does depend on circumstances, we dont have family in london either so in the early days it was only when we had family visiting that we would grab the chance for an hour or two out but these days(she will be 2 very soon) we prob manage to go out about once a month. I have a few mums that I have become good friends with and we sit for each other and help each other out as we are all in the same situation with no families close to hand.

[womanofdulwich]

i think if you have a summer baby you will go out much quicker than if you had one in middle november. my first was born mid nov and i don't think i went out side until the health visitor said i had to go down the clinic for a weigh in/check up.

[Pickle]

I went out (as in outside, not out in the evening Colleen style) very quickly after both births. We went for hot chocolate the day after I got home with baby #1 as having been stuck in hospital for 5 days being induced I was suffering a bit from cabin fever. As he was early we didn't even have our pram, so drove to Cafe Nero (was the middle of winter) and sat him in his carseat on a table while we sat there a bit shellshocked.

With my 2nd baby I was out walking down Lordship Lane less than 24 hours after I had her. Combination of having a 17 month old who needed fresh air and my mother in law staying with us - if I hadn't got out of the house I would have killed someone ;-)

[Polly D]

I totally support Coleen in going out, I'm just amazed she had the energy for it, and looked so glam. I was a rocking, snivelling mess at that stage and for a long time after so it's kind of reassuring to hear other parents felt similar. My parents live in London and Granny especially is a v keen babysitter but, like clux, hangovers and baby are tough. Mind you, I suppose I could always go out and not drink...what?! Hmmmmm...

Back in Feb I first left the house 5 days after R was born to try and go to Sainsbury's but we only got as far as the other side of the road before realising the car seat didn't fit in the car. Went for a walk round Dulwich park the next day when, like ryedalema, I thought someone would steal him if I took my eyes off him, yet at the same time had an overwhelming feeling of 'OH MY GOD, WHAT HAVE WE DONE' and came home for a cup of tea and slice of carrot cake which some wonderful person had sent us from ED deli. We took him to Spain at 9 weeks for a wedding, which felt quite brave, and I remember thinking: this is wierd, being out at night but of course the baby was with us. But about 3 months later I think was the first time we properly went out alone, and that was only as far as Franklins.

But we're becoming more daring: next weekend is our first night away! Woo hoooooo

[Keef]

If we're talking about going out with the baby, we did it quite early, she was in the CPT at 11 days! :)-D

Mrs Keef has left her with her mum or my mum for an hour or so in the afternoon, but we've yet to go out together in the evening.

[EmmaCC]

Good on her for going out...why shouldn't she if her baby is being cared for by someone she trusts? My family don't live close by but we take every opportunity when they're here to go out as a couple and have a conversation that's not interupted by the baby or domestic chores taking over! It also makes you appreciate the baby so much more when you go back!

Interesting that no one has even questioned why Wayne was out???!!!! Putting aside possible breastfeeding, he does have 50% responsibility!!!

[Dulwich Born And Bred]

There is nothing wrong with going out at all, No one is disputing that, but at nine days old, I would not have wanted to go out without my son even if I could, I wanted to bask in motherhood and enjoy being with him. The newborn stage goes so quick. Even now, he is 10 weeks old and I don't want to leave him with anyone and I have all my family close by and they are fantastic but I enjoy being with him so much that the thought of leaving him with someone has not entered my head as I take him out with me. I am sure in time I will leave him with my family whilst I go out but for now no and certainly not when he was barely two weeks old. I have spent years clubbing it with the girls and drinking that I didn't feel I needed to do that when he was 9 days old. I was too busy getting to know him and feeding him non stop. Not to mention trying to wee without crying!