pepsi Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 ???? Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> > > sounds like a change in behaviour identified in> some rigourous research to meNo - just an observation shared by many (including by many parents I must add). Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255505 Share on other sites More sharing options...
???? Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 so in actual fact, opinion...ok, thanks Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255508 Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Bob* Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 I think this diagram illustrating current thinking helps explain things, ????. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255509 Share on other sites More sharing options...
legalbeagle Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 > Oh come on, what a daft response - parents being> "exhausted, stressed, worrying about the baby> sleeping, worrying about finances" etc. You don't> need academic research to tell you that these> things are hardly a 21st century malady. Some> people behave as if having children has only just> been invented!But Pepsi the point is that is hasn't happened to that person before. Cimbing mountains, falling in love, overcoming illness, adopting children, curing diseases, flying at the speed of sound, having a child - it's all been done before. Does that mean we can dismiss the novelty and difficulties that each of us find when we ourselves do them for the first time? Are we to be chastised for making a fuss about coping with grief on the basis that others have done it before us? On your logic you should just "get over" other people being rude to you - after all people have been rude for years? Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255510 Share on other sites More sharing options...
pepsi Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 ???? Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> so in actual fact, opinion...ok, thanksObservation isn't the same as opinion ????.Legalbeagle - I take your point, I really do and I appreciate that everyone's response to major life events is bound to be different but I frequently come across a lack of awareness and respect for others on the part of some, which I just don't think existed on such a large scale a few years ago, and which is not just restricted by the way to middle class ED parents. The point here being that yes, people have been rude for years but perhaps not in such huge numbers. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255513 Share on other sites More sharing options...
legalbeagle Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Well Pepsi it would be a huge shame if you are right - though if it's your observation then it can hardly be "wrong". Perhaps I have been fortunate enough only to meet more polite people in ED recently! Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255514 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gimme Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Perhaps people these days think that as everyone else is going to be rude they might as well too.I often find that people have their guard up in London in a way that doesn't exist in other places I go regularly.Every time I go to Edinburgh, my whole outlook changes as I assume that everyone will be friendly until proven otherwise. In London it's the opposite - I'm often guilty of assuming that people are going to be unfriendly until proven otherwise. And that's probably the way a lot of people are, which is why a lot of people come across as rude and arrogant, when they are probably not deep down.Perhaps everyone reading this thread should try an experiment - catch the eye of people as you pass them in Lordship Lane and say hello and see what the reaction is. It will confuse the life out of a lot of people who will look at you with suspicion but you might get a few pleasantly surprised looksOr an even more radical experiment - out of the blue say excuse me to an ED mum, tell her you are thinking of buying a Bugaboo and would she recommend it and see if the hard exterior breaks out into the light of friendliness. It probably will. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255515 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Nappy Lady Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Interestingly when I moved to London 13/14 years ago I expected people to be unfriendly, but actually I found it just the opposite. Especially the people in my road, there is a real neighbourhood support network, and since I have been a Mum - most parents too. Yes you meet exceptions, as you would anywhere, and in any social group but overall I'd say it is a very friendly place. Oh and on good days, when not harrassed I do walk along smiling at people and they do indeed smile back!Molly Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255523 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moos Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Gimme Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> Or an even more radical experiment - out of the> blue say excuse me to an ED mum, tell her you are> thinking of buying a Bugaboo and would she> recommend it and see if the hard exterior breaks> out into the light of friendliness. It probably> will.One of the very nice things about having a baby in tow is that total strangers do talk to you, and barriers immediately break down. There's no compliment like having someone tell you how sweet your baby is. Many new mothers feel isolated and struggle to find others to spend time with during the day (if you don't believe me, read some of the family discussion room threads), and would be very happy to make friends, even if only for a few minutes. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255524 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moos Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Interesting cross-post with Molly there! :) Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255525 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nero Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 * Thanks for that! It's like a pissed-up version of the ATV credits! Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255537 Share on other sites More sharing options...
woofmarkthedog Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Like *Bob* illustrated so succinctly.W**F Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255540 Share on other sites More sharing options...
LegalEagle-ish Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Does anyone wonder what it will be like when they all turn into teenagers? Will all the teenagers be like the parents, studying hard and working towards having a career, or just live off their elderly parents waiting for them to pop their crocks and hand them their money? Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255544 Share on other sites More sharing options...
iaineasy Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 whilst I have no real opinion on this article or whether EDM's deserve this kind of slating( I have found every one of them that I have met to be very lovley indeed and I dont drink coffee from nero) I would like to applaude bob for his creative diagram because that takes all the aspects of this whole debate and makes it very funny indeed with out the chit chat!! well done BOBhugs as ever. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255549 Share on other sites More sharing options...
arriety Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 I just don't understand the obsession with stereotyping mothers? replace the word mother with anything and the whole thing looks like the nonsense it is. We have come a long way in terms of removing prejudice and stereotype and racism and so on, but for some reason one of the few places its really ok to completely slag off a group is when women become mothers. Prams exist, pavements are narrow, people (not just mothers) have good days and bad days, get over it. Why would a group of any kind care to notice a bloke out on his own having a coffee!? Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255566 Share on other sites More sharing options...
eater81 Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 That article is great! Couldn't have put it better myself. Piss of with your mountain biked tyred prams and your long haired simpering brats. If you were really decent parents you wouldnt be bringing your kids up in this open sewer of a city. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255611 Share on other sites More sharing options...
???? Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255614 Share on other sites More sharing options...
???? Posted October 5, 2009 Share Posted October 5, 2009 Eater's been on the sauce again. That's when the intolerable injustice of his shitty life comes bubbling over...on the internet of course. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255616 Share on other sites More sharing options...
eater81 Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 My life is shit, but no shitter, indeed maybe better than most other people's, however I cannot suffer fools in the same way that others can. That is why I act like such an arsehole, its my only way of keeping myself sane and gaining some kind of perverted pleasure from life. Incidentally, the only sauce I had last night was tobasco on my tea. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255696 Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeanMacGabhann Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 So that's ok then Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255700 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magpie Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 I see no reason to apologise for a lack of Jamaicans and Irish in East Dulwich, nor to apologise for being middle class and white. As to mothers with buggies being rude. I was brought up to be considerate to people in more difficult circumstances than myself. This means that it is good manners to give way to the elderly, the infirm, those with disabilities, and unsurprisingly the pregnant, and those with young children. Assuming that a person looking after a child should get out the way of an able bodied adult is rude, and complaining about it is bad manners. Harden the f**k up. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255762 Share on other sites More sharing options...
woofmarkthedog Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 eater81 Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> My life is shit, but no shitter, indeed maybe> better than most other people's, however I cannot> suffer fools in the same way that others can. That> is why I act like such an arsehole, its my only> way of keeping myself sane and gaining some kind> of perverted pleasure from life. Incidentally, the> only sauce I had last night was tobasco on my tea.___________________________________________________________________The whole catering sized bottle I take it ?W**F Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255765 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brendan Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 Not that I intend to come across confrontational or old fashioned or whatever but isn?t the most worrying thing about this the borderline aggression being shown by men towards women? I can just about understand it from other women towards women but where I grew if a man displayed that sort of aggression towards a woman they would, justifiably, get quite badly hurt. I dunno maybe it?s ok if it?s online or something. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255777 Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeanMacGabhann Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 Plus ca change, eh Brendan? Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255778 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brendan Posted October 6, 2009 Share Posted October 6, 2009 Yeah yeah, inappropriate comments about plunging necklines and fukboots are a completely different story Sean. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/8261-east-dulwich-in-the-new-statesman/page/4/#findComment-255779 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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