Come out come out, where ever you are...

[dulwichmum]

BBW - you may or may not have realised this by now, but I do not appreciate you designing situations for DM to fit into. Despite your previous obscene insinuations, my character is not promiscuous - that is in your head. Dulwichmum has only ever had one housekeeper - right from the beginning, her name is Albena. It has never been implied that she arrived as a result of people trafficing, that is your imagination. Dulwichmum has a series of au pairs, and she claims to hide their passports. If you are going to be offended by my blog, and many are, you could at least read it.

DM have never mocked or degraded those in financial difficulty. She is a food snob and shops at Borough Market and Waitrose/Ocado - there are so many like her. Notice how excited forumites get at the thought of an M&S on Lordship Lane.

You know nothing about me, despite your private messages. You know nothing at all.

I have not defended DM's character, observation is everything. For all you know, I could be living in a local council house ... or a retired brickie from Penge. You have clearly grown up in the era of reality TV. Oh dear...

[Santerme]

Peckhamgatecrasher Wrote:

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> I can honestly say, Brendan has displayed the most

> exquisite manners I've ever come across in a man

> under 70.

Most useful thing I learned at Sandhurst was the correct way to tackle asparagus...

[bigbadwolf]

D.M,

I've followed your blog as you well know. From what I've read you've had several au-pairs, I believe that the last one was found with a mug that said "I love Brixton". She was got rid of, by which ever means you saw fit.

Yes, I appreciate that D.M isn't promiscuous at heart, but she's cerainly bandied the sugestion that she'll entertain a squad of fitness instructors, even if it is only over a 'glass half empty'. I do however realise that my situations have often seen you end up in some embarressing and unlady like manouvres. I'm sorry for that and I'll remember that in future that even if the Dulwichmum doesn't like what's happening to her, the women behind the character is actualy offended. That path will now be closed to me. I'm sorry.

However,

You have mocked those in financial difficulty. To you it may seem harmless (much like the situations I've put D.M in) but to poke fun at those wo have to go the lower end of highstreet because they can no longer afford the luxuries that you're supposedly still enjoying, is still mocking those who have to do without. Especially in the situation we've found ourselves in due to people you're supposedly married to. It's like saying "have a wiff of my roses to get rid of the smell of ash". It could be seen by some as offensive.

Reality T.V,

I'm afraid you're wrong here D.M. I was brought up (thankfully) before this craze took place and by the time it had infected the moral fibre of our society I was and still am old enough to see through it for what it is. You're blog however serves as a reminder of perhaps a greater threat of 'fantasy T.V'.

You're right, I don't know anything about you except for our private conversations. You probably know a little more about me from what I've posted such as my age etc...

I'm fine with that.

I hope what I written has cleared up any misconceptions on my part.

Take care.

[HAL9000]

bigbadwolf Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> ... the character of Dulwichmum ...

You do realise that you are criticising the behaviour of a satirical construct, a parody of real life, a social commentary?

I think it's time you admitted that BBW too, is a cleverly crafted satire: the antithesis of everything DM represents. And that you are really a retired neurosurgeon who even sent his gardener to a couple of drinks to lull us into a false sense of security?

Now, that would have been a response worthy of a truly vivid imagination ? a Bond of the canine world. Never mind - take it out on that rubber bone of yours and bounce back in moderation. Moderation in all things - Aristotle

Some of your posts are genuinely funny ? but some aren?t.

[LegalEagle-ish]

Damn - you lot need to stop brawling in public!

Was it the hot weather that got everyone a bit crabby?

Come on now guys, lets all kiss and make up.

[bigbadwolf]

Sometimes Legal, the linen has to be aired in public. I was being pushed around and some were trying to shift me to the other side of the fence.

Sometimes, I have to bite back.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZuYDFhqd4Y

[HAL9000]

bigbadwolf Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Sometimes, I have to bite back.

I think it would help to ask (yourself) what this forum would be like if you were allowed free reign?

Why don't you post here a brief description of what such a scenario would imply?

[Sunlover00]

I can't remember any BBW's posts (Sorry BBW but I just have the memory capacity of a goldfish) but bad humour or not, I think everyone should leave off BBW now. He was only tryin to do a nice thing by starting this thread and if I wee getting some gip abt my fabulous jokes I'd get defensive too.

So we're all agreed, no more agro from anyone? Good.

Drinks still on then? ;o)

[bigbadwolf]

Don't worry Sunlover, I can only remember a few. I have absolutely no problem with people commenting on my sense of humour whether it's disliking/commenting on/picking apart or saying it's not funny. It's up to them to interpret it.

What I have a problem with is when someone starts on me for no reason what so ever and then everyone else jumps in as well. I wont be intimidated here or on the street and I'll defend myself or bite back.

Thanks all the same though SL.

[Sally81]

I'd like to come along...You lot are a bit scary sometimes though....but very helpful and occasionally hilarious!

[mockney piers]

I wouldn't worry, noones scary in real life, big bunch of softies. Even our BBW is jolly and polite in real life.

[bigbadwolf]

You should've seen the state of me after the last piss up.

[HAL9000]

That's how you remember it. My spycam tells it like it was...

[bigbadwolf]

Hal,

What you do or don't do to your pets after dark is your affair. That is not me.

I shudder to think what went on after you stopped filming. What with all those empty bottles lying around.

[bignumber5]

You do realise that you are criticising the behaviour of a satirical construct, a parody of real life, a social commentary?

At the risk of fanning the fire, I think BBW is probably well aware that DM is a satirical construct, but I've recently realised that the forum BBW is unlikely to be how the man behind it lives his life, rather that it is something of a caricature. So actually, his point about the aspects of DM that are at the expense of others is pretty valid. I suspect that the difference is that DM does her thing on her blog and here, but doesn't take it outside of the classroom, so to speak.

BBW, if you are indeed something of a parody yourself (Gawd help us all if you're completely for real ;-)) then perhaps that's the lesson that DM can teach you.

DM, rather than reprimanding the young whippersnapper, why not take him in hand and show him how it's done:

Sort of... well...

http://www.aceshowbiz.com/images/news/00020573.jpg

[woofmarkthedog]

Now if anyone can tell me who is not a real person on this then "you gott betta eyes" than me (mine are glass btw and held in with wire)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fm4xDzAlX94

The Bristle hound is real....No?

W**F

**Writer takes of dog costume , hangs it over the back of the chair "See ya' in the morning ol' fella..!" & heads up to bed *

[HAL9000]

Just found some archive footage of BBW and DM from their salad days in Hollywood - they were a terrific double act (both performed their own stunts, too):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhga8c42sw4

[MrBen]

Sally81 Wrote:

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> I'd like to come along...You lot are a bit scary

> sometimes though....but very helpful and

> occasionally hilarious!

I know what you mean Sal but turn up and you'll find they're all harmless. Take the online battles into the ring and you'd have a bunch of wheezing, out of shape IT workers, frustrated nurses and media creatives, rolled up Guardian in hand, flailing at each other aimlessly. Like one of those fights from school.

LET US THANK THE FORUM FOR GIVING THESE PEOPLE A VOICE.

[bigbadwolf]

bignumber5 Wrote:

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> You do realise that you are criticising the

> behaviour of a satirical construct, a parody of

> real life, a social commentary?

If you're talking about me BN5, not so much.

> At the risk of fanning the fire, I think BBW is

> probably well aware that DM is a satirical

> construct, but I've recently realised that the

> forum BBW is unlikely to be how the man behind it

> lives his life, rather that it is something of a

> caricature. So actually, his point about the

> aspects of DM that are at the expense of others is

> pretty valid. I suspect that the difference is

> that DM does her thing on her blog and here, but

> doesn't take it outside of the classroom, so to

> speak.

>

> BBW, if you are indeed something of a parody

> yourself (Gawd help us all if you're completely

> for real ;-)) then perhaps that's the lesson that

> DM can teach you.

I actually find it shocking that you think that my posting style suggests that I've created some kind of alter ego for myself. I've stated quite clearly who I am and often converse in quite a civil tone with the majority of you. I admit that I can come across as brash and crude as D.M and other's have pointed out. I'm afraid that this is simply just me being me. You may find this shocking but I do have a very dark sense of humour and most of my friends share the same sense of humour. I don't wish the machinations of my cruel humour on anyone either. I'm not somekind of oafish monster either. Get a bloody grip!

> DM, rather than reprimanding the young

> whippersnapper, why not take him in hand and show

> him how it's done:

Don't make me laugh. My writing style may be crude and charmless but it most certainly isn't simple or repetative. I abhore those stupid smiley face's and I wouldn't dream of using a sentence between 2 highlights (*) to explain some physical action that relates to the visual presentation of the post. That shows a lack of literal dexterity and I knew that in secondary school.

> Sort of... well...

>

> http://www.aceshowbiz.com/images/news/00020573.jpg

[dulwichmum]

*laughs socks off*...

[Keef]

See his is it, I just don't believe you BBW. You may not be a character, I believe you're not, but I just don't believe you'd say all the things you say on here, if you found yourself in a pub with the likes of DM. This thread should never have become an attack the wolf, but you've obviously made an impression! As Piers says, it's to your credit that you can take it, rather than trying to rally a bunch of the saddest net geeks in the world, to "take us down". Fucking idiots!

[bigbadwolf]

Keef,

I've no intention of speaking to any of you at a pub in the way I carry on here. I'd be seperated with most of my teeth if I did. I think that the majority (including yourself) know this. I suppose I'll have to admit on reflection that this could be seen as a charicature on my part. I've met with several of you you and I carried myself politely.

I very much doubt I'd find myself in a pub with D.M. I would still verbally defend myself if I found myself the subject of attack.

I don't see any of you, D.M and Jah Lush included as any kind of 'net geek'. I see you as all members of a valuable community message board that does benefit it's users. If others find that sad then that's their loss because lets face it, if you live in the east Dulwich and it's borders and you're not on the forum...you're no one.

[mockney piers]

I think you may mean literary dexterity, my literal dexterity is terrble these days, can't even touch my toes.

Anyway, enough with the personal attacks, and back to online identity, oh for the retopificating power of a chair.

[bigbadwolf]

mockney piers Wrote:

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> I think you may mean literary dexterity, my

> literal dexterity is terrble these days, can't

> even touch my toes.

Yes, I think you've got me there Mockney.

[capt_birdseye]

C