How to fit everything in?

[snowboarder]

Snowboarder stupid question number 1...

So me and baby snowboarder are all a bit chaotic...despite all his 18 weeks we have no real routine apart from trying to feed every 3 hrs ish and as said before naps are as and when...and we're a bit bored (ie I'm tearing my hair out and he's screaming at me no matter what toys I buy) so I've been madly thinking of activities for the autumn. Couple of nice morning sessions of singing etc. hopefully arranged. I've nearly got the whole week sorted.

Now I'm thinking - I need to sort out naps (sleeping is better in the mornings if at all) and before too long this child will need some proper food, both of which need us to be at home mid morning time I think...so what happens to activities? Seriously I need to get out but does he need to stay in? How do people manage?

Again..so.hard...

[snowboarder]

ps - is it in any way obvious I've been on my own too much this week....?

[Belle]

We've only been weaning for a few weeks but as it's early days we're not wedded to times really so although it's definitely extra work (and hard work) I do find I don't have to change my days. Yesterday for instance, me and my mum wanted to get out and about early so we didn't do breakfast - but instead he had quite a lot of stuff for lunch. but am doing baby led weaning so that does lend itself to being flexible I guess. I've only just signed up for a class because I found up till now I could never tell if I'd be able to make it or not. Now I'm a bit more gung ho and will just go ahead with plans even if he's being a nightmare, for my own sanity and in the hopes that it'll calm him down.

[Mellors]

By the time they are onto proper food (6 - 9 months or so) they should be able to last the morning. I used to go to morning activity, take a bottle (or give a feed if you are bf) mid morning to put her on, and then get back sharpish at 12 or so.

Lunch at 12 then straight to bed with another feed at about 12.30. She zonks till about 2.30 - 3pm though, so afternoons can be a bit tricky.

Its all a bit hit and miss at 18 weeks - I just used to drag her along anyway and let her kip in the car seat/buggy/floor if she nodded off, cause I still had no 1 son to entertain.

[Mellors]

Or just take food with you - no problem if you are with other mums getting the bib and pot out, and even easier if you are baby led weaning cause you can just take rice cakes/bread sticks/fruit/peppers/carrots/mini sandwiches etc etc and let them help themselves.

Don't worry, it just kind of sorts itself out somehow (I have never managed a routine yet, or at least not intentionally).

[pebbles]

Not stupid question at all - it's all so confusing

I remember when I started weaning he would start getting grouchy about 10.30/11ish for food so on the days that i was at home/cafe/friends house that is when I would feed him his lunch (starting off my half a boob as well) and I slowly moved it back to 12/12.30 when he started eating more brekkie so therefore allowed me to be more flexible during morning. However on the days that I had activities in the morning I would just give him a proper milk feed at that time and then i woudl always try and get him to somewhere that i could try and feed him for 12. Sometimes he wouldn't take anything as was full from milk but other times he would take a bit. It certainly took a few deep breaths to be "cool, calm and collected" about not following my routine - i'm afraid i was very much a routine type mum however those deep breaths seemed to work and slowly it just worked.

I truly believe mums sanity is more important to following routine and getting food in them at the "right" time - therefore if keeping you sane means getting out and about and doing classes (it's what kept me sane) then that should be your focus and snowboarder junior will fit around you - it might take a bit of time though but it will happen

The other thing I have to say is my son didn't really play with toys until after he was 1. I remember being worried and confused and I suppose a bit annoyed that I couldn't entertain him with toys however what I did find he absolutely loved is being outside. Whether that be in his pram but more often on a rug so if you have outdoor space i'd really give it a try - he loved watching the leaves on the trees etc - it also gave me a great opportunity to sit with him and read a few pages of a book!!! :)

Do keep the questions coming snowboarder, they're not silly questions and I know if I had had the guts to ask these questions when my little one was a baby I would have felt so much happier and reassured about what I was doing.

[quickbrownfox]

I always found it was good to stay home in the morning with a small baby - they sleep (put them down as early as they'll tolerate) and you get your housework done - which means you feel so much better about everything. Then mid to late morning you can head out and be sociable - staying out for as long as possible to get through that late late afternoon/ early evening time where you're counting the minutes until your partner gets home. Bubs can nap in buggy or carseat again in afternoon, and a short one is fine if they've had a good morning sleep.

Re: food, agree, take bits and bobs with you and just wing it!

PS I am no expert

[Mellors]

I just remembered my food lifesaver - always have a banana stashed about your person/in your change bag/the car. Babies generally love 'em and dont mind if they're squishy.

[Fuschia]

I struggle with mine as they like to nap in the morning.. and if I take them out and keep them awake, they conk out in the car or the buggy on the way home, before they've had their lunch. It is a pain being out somewhere with a grouchy baby who only wnats to sleep, as well.

But you just have to do your best!!

I'd suggest you let the baby nap on the way to a class or club, if they wnat to, and be ready with a snack for after.

Re intoducing solids, start with breakfast, if that is easier for you. No hurry to get onto 3 meals per day.

[Pickle]

I, even still, find it easier to get out in the mornings than the afternoons. When weaning started I'd give milk on waking, then breakfast. Babies generally slept for a bit at 9am then straight out the door at 10 to whatever activity we had for the day (or I could have gone out at 9am and have them sleep in the buggy, but that was just too early!!). I used to do a milk feed around 10.30am whereever we were. Then home quickly after the activity for lunch at 11.30 - 12ish.

These days things are much more relaxed as neither child sleeps in the morning, there are no mid-morning milk feeds, and they're happy to wait a bit for lunch if necessary (I always carry a good selection of snacks to keep them going if need be). The "difficult" stage when you first start weaning doesn't last long, and you can always feed when out and about.

P x

[millie42]

For both of mine (3.5 yrs and 10 mths) - I always tried to get out and about as much as possible when they were small and eventually both of them slept really well in their buggy/car seat. I found I was going potty being stuck at home so would go on long walks, trips into town etc. Now the oldest is 3.5 (and obviously I cant have both asleep in buggies) I try and do everything in the mornings get them home for lunch and straight into bed they both sleep in the afternoons for 2.5/3hrs which gives me some free time. If they wake up grumpy it would be back out in the pram or up the park for an hour or so before tea. It does take a while to get them into the sleep routine and we had a few niggles on the way but they (and I) are now much better natured in the afternoons and the routine works well for all of us.

I think it is very hard being at home full time with a young baby esp and it is really important to get structure in your day so you always know you have something planned. The kids welcome the routine and its a great way to get to know other children and mums. The kids will fit into your routine if you stick to it.