bigbadwolf Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 This is another topic that I feel deserves some serious discussion.Ever since I was young I've been spellbound by things that I'm not allowed to have, be it a box of matches or a nuclear weapon. When I was young my parents would save up for us to go on holiday and on some occasions we were lucky enough to go abroad, usually on the continent. These excersions would expose me to utopia of contraband and I would try my hardest to engage in my favourite hobby;SmugglingSmuggling is entrenched in our history as a nation whether it's the finest french brandy or the latest rude playing cards drifting their merry way past the divs at her majesties customs and excise. Anyway, During my youth and to this day I've upheld the tradition of smuggling. I've brought back everything from flick knives to the most potent Cannabis seeds imaginable. It got so bad that my parents would often search my luggage before we made our way back home. I once tried to import a beanbag gun/riot control device but it was intercepted and I was royally f.cked over by the customs men.What have you lot sneaked into the country.(Moved to the Lounge as it is not a current affair or topic relevant for the Drawing Room - The Administrator) Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peckhamgatecrasher Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 Can't help thinking this would be better off in The Lounge.However, my friend smuggled poteen from Ireland to UK in a Madonna shaped holy water bottle.A chap I knew whose leg was blown off by a land mine had a prosthetic one fitted. He learned to fly and regularly smuggled bottles of brandy from France to UK in the fake leg. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231358 Share on other sites More sharing options...
matthew123 Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 Perhaps BBW is still unable to start new threads in Lounge and so had Admin unwittingly smuggle it in!! Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231389 Share on other sites More sharing options...
???? Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 I'm awaiting BBW's thread on 'Masturbation' in the Drawing Room Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231392 Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeanMacGabhann Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 I would suggest that if BBW wants to be re-admitted to Lounge posts, starting non-Drawing Room topics in the DR isn't the best way to do it Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231394 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easties EL Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 Vegemite into every country possible. B) Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231396 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Windom Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 the usual accidental hash from the Dam, i blame it on a big coat with many pockets and a somewhat forgetful state.... Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231397 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brendan Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 Way more than my allowed quota of wine every time I fly back from South Africa. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231403 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ted Max Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 It doesn't count if it's inside your body at the time. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231404 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brendan Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 Try explaining that to the HM customs officers on the gate at Heathrow for the 11:30 from Bogota. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231413 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huguenot Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 I smuggled 10 kilos of Stinking Bishop into Beijing in my suitcase.Not one of my finest moments, it cost me two suits and half my favourite wardrobe. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231433 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jah Lush Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 Lighters, flick knives and cigarettes as a kid and later I'd smuggle drugs into whatever country I was visiting for a holiday, usually pills or powders of the upwardly direction and maybe a bit of weed. On the first occasion my friends and I bottled it before we went through Customs on our way to Spain and so we each took what was supposed to be a fortnight's supply of blues (speed) in one hit before we got on the plane.Speeding off my tits, eyes bulging, gurning like a lunatic, very drunk and sweating profusely I was stopped at Customs. I thought this is it, finger up the arse time but they only wanted to double check my passport which was a yearly one and then after a quick once over I was let through. Phew! Was up for days afterwards though. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231437 Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbadwolf Posted July 30, 2009 Author Share Posted July 30, 2009 Good show Jah, I knew I could count on you.I don't think I'd go as far as smuggling class A drugs as I'd probably get carried away and find myself banged up in some Venezuelan prison where my arsehole would be routinely butchered by all the prison guards.I prefer interesting stuff such as exotic weapons. I heard a story once about my dad who in the mid 80's overloaded a 4x4 to such an extent that the front wheels struggled to maintain contact with the road since the back seats were stacked up with stella and plonk. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-231480 Share on other sites More sharing options...
rememberwhen Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 Not quite on topic because it was not smuggled, but as a kid I was on holiday in Majorca. During this holiday I had collected several sets of matchboxes. Each set of 40 was of things like flags of the world, breeds of dogs, etc. End of holiday, into suitcase they go. All full of non safety matches!Well we all survived , despite the potential bomb in the plane's hold. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232650 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andystar Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 Flick knives in a tuba, a few boxes of Coca leaf tea from Colombia, I distracted them by taking a 24 pack of beer onto the plane. Sharks' jaws for my dear lil brother. My mum smuggled a bow + arrows & a vcr once & some awesome chilli pepper seeds for me. (not at the same time tho ) Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232688 Share on other sites More sharing options...
woofmarkthedog Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 I have a friend who when we goes skiing loves the "white powder" so much he carefully un peels a couple of pot noodle lids and laces them with "it" then carefully superglues lid down again.( method 1 )He also being a very dubious sort mostly drives to France to ski, the on the cheap/ younger passenger/mule generally unwittingly gets his kit laced somehow ( usually ski poles ) prior to leaving.Funnily everyone eagerly awaits their arrival at the resort, the new boy is pale as a ghost when the contraband is unpacked.W**F*BTW this is not a confessional by proxy* Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232774 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Kelly Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 NOT for the timidOn ski holiday? Bring several pairs of skis (race stock) A pair of foam core slalom skis hollowed from tip to tail with a plastic tube fitted in place. The contraband tubes terminate into the base material which is simply cut open with a razor and replugged with the ptex base material after filling. Both skis (pair) are constructed in the same fashion so their weight would not throw an eye of suspicion. We have inventory of current model year skis "cored" and will consider a reasonable trade for services provided or will sell contra-custom skis outright - CASH ONLYPM for details if interested, also offering conversion services for your equipment, vehicle, etc.current passport and free time available for hireIan Kelly Courier Services Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232854 Share on other sites More sharing options...
woofmarkthedog Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 Can these "custom" ski's get through Jamacian customs with out raising suspicion ?If so I'll have a couple of pairs and fill them with top grade Cocaine (don't tell anyone my plan).Sounds absolutely foolproof!....as a bit of research what is the skiing actually like in Kingston town ?Just in case "sods law" I get a pull.W**F Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232879 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andystar Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 woofmarkthedog Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> Can these "custom" ski's get through Jamacian> customs with out raising suspicion ?> > If so I'll have a couple of pairs and fill them> with top grade Cocaine (don't tell anyone my> plan).> > > Sounds absolutely foolproof!....as a bit of> research what is the skiing actually like in> Kingston town ?> > Just in case "sods law" I get a pull.> > > W**FMaybe you can get a hollowed out bobsled??http://http//ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51YSTS8RDVL._SL500_AA240_.jpg Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232896 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassius Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 Cannabis in rum from Barbados - then you have cannabis infused rum and when you've dried the leaves out you have rum-infused cannabis - not done by me but by my ex fil. Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232898 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Kelly Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 Discussion of illegal contraband is foolish in open forum. I can only suggest a stay over in Nassau/Freeport for duty free shopping. Remember it is mid winter in south american this time of year. Detailed discussion is really a conversation best had in pm.Ian Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232937 Share on other sites More sharing options...
woofmarkthedog Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 Ian......*Ahem*..Are you related to Ned Kelly ? by chance.W**FPs. I need a stowage silo, say 3000 m underground x about say 200m round,lead lined with a satellite connection. To store a "BIG POINTY THING* in. Are you able to help? Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232943 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Kelly Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 If you have the ?, I have the resources. How deep is your wallet? Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232947 Share on other sites More sharing options...
daizie Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 how hard is your love Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232948 Share on other sites More sharing options...
woofmarkthedog Posted August 2, 2009 Share Posted August 2, 2009 daizie Wrote:-------------------------------------------------------> how hard is your love---------------------------------Dazie, this is a sensible conversation between me and "Ian 007 Kelly"He may have hard love but let the business flow here "sweetheart"W**F Link to comment https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/7268-anything-to-declare/#findComment-232951 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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