30 minutes

[Belle77]

hello,

About this time of day - I start to long for someone to hand my beautiful 10 week old to. He doesn't nap for more than a few min at a time in the day and goes to bed about 10 pm. The reality of single motherhood is I haven't got anyone. Are there any good toys that might distract him for that long? Also, if so, would anyone like to sell theirs?!

M'aidez,

Belle

[melbourne groover]

Have you got one of those seats that has a vibration setting? I found this invaluable, he would drop off to sleep in it and even if I couldn't get him into bed he was asleep and we all had a bit of down time.... he then would go to sleep in it and I could transfer him to bed then, from there bedtime evolved into the standard 7pm.

Worth a try maybe?

Good luck ;-)

Amy

[Fuschia]

A swing! Maybe a bit old to start him in one now, but they're a godsend.

But hang in there, at about 12w they do start to realise what night time is and bedtime comes forward.

xx

[woofmarkthedog]

Belle

Your post speaks volumes, it's so tough bringing up young babies & finding a little time out. As a couple it's hard but on your own is really tough, however it makes you in the end.

My partner travelled a lot for work so I had a lot of "us' time, I used a mechanical rocker , then later a baby gym matt with the music and toys above.

I used to get us both in the bathroom put radio 4 on low, make it all safe then run a bath for myself. Somehow the closed environment , the smells, noises really calmed him down. I sat in the bath and chilled a little, just watching him.

Now he is 8 & his brother is 5, & we are all really close because of the time we spent.

Keep up the good work.

[Moos]

Belle, just want to echo the sentiment expressed by Fuschia and Woof - you're doing alone what brings couples to their knees with tiredness. Well done you.

Would you be able to organise any swaps with nearby mothers who have babies of similar age? They're so portable when little - if you'd consider going to a friend's house and looking after two babies for a few hours one evening, perhaps another mother would do the same for you?

Also really agree with Fuschia about the 12-week change - obviously, it doesn't happen overnight, but around that time, babies often do become a little steadier and are able to sleep for longer, so you might be able to get a little time back in the evening.

Best of luck, and let us know how you get on.

[millsa]

Hi Belle,

I still remember these first few weeks of little sleep very well, and I spent most of the time on my own with hubby working late. Mothercare wibrating chair was brilliant, the wibration put my baby to sleep or just kept him entertained and calm. I can lend you mine but only for about 5 weeks as I pormised it to a friend who is having a baby at the end of Aug. Your baby should sleep better in 5 weeks time anyway, fingers crossed. Pls let me know if you want it.

and good luck with everything

x

[cactus]

I remember how tough the early evenings could be with a young baby, my partner and I lived

apart for the first two years of our son's life, so I was usually alone for that part of the day.

Similar to Woof, I'd run a bath and leave him kicking around on the floor for half an hour

which often worked a treat. Or having a bath together was a relaxing way of whiling away a bit

of the long evening, though not exactly a break I know.

I had a Tiny Love cot mobile, which played different tunes and would hold his attention for quite a while,

I think I bought it from Jojo Maman Bebe. Also at around 12-14 weeks, babies do seem to become more interested

in the world around them, and they will start grabbing at toys and objects, which increasingly keeps them absorbed.

Good luck.

[Belle77]

Thank you for the tips. We had a candlelit bath tonight (not trying to give him a complex, light in the bathroom is presently broken!) and it helped a great deal.

B x

[The Nappy Lady]

Belle, are you local?

If so, I'd be happy to pop around one day to hold baby while you take 30 minutes to do whatever - sleep, bath, jobs etc....just PM me. I will drink a cup of tea and have a 'small baby fix' while you get a well deserved break.

I am off on hols soon, but happy to try to fit something in before I go...have Mum with me for next couple of weeks so even easier.....

Molly

[Special Chocolates]

It really does get easier around 12 weeks! I speak from recent experience as my baby is now 16 weeks but spent first 9/10 weeks of life crying and i never thought it would end, but it slowly got better and things have been so much easier in last month or so...

Mine spent 90% of time in a sling - especially when indoors as i could potter around and generally just feel like i wasnt destined to spend rest of my life on the sofa...do you have one? there are probably loads for sale v cheaply on here if not. I found it to be total lifesaver as he would chill out for hours in it.

Early evening is the worst as it feels like day has dragged on forever - have you tried feed/bath/story/bed from about 6? baby will probably take a few weeks to cotton on that it means bedtime but doing this every night really helped me feel like i was making (some) progress.

:)

[The Nappy Lady]

Good point Special Chocolates (love that name by the way). I find the bathtime thing key in making bathtime run smoothly - it keeps baby going for the last hour when otherwise she'd probably go to sleep too early, and actually she has a fun time, and then goes down like a dream....well, at least most of the time.

Molly