Our youngest daughter went to St Anthony's many years ago. My husband is catholic, and was a regular attendee at St, Thomas More, so she met the criteria. I cannot think that a child of nursery age would be expected to attend mass on a weekly basis.
You could probably spend money on an advocate to help to get your child an EHCP if they need one, but no one can change the culture of a school, so you need to find one that will work with you. I think all schools are so stretched at the moment, no one is really getting the support they need. My child is at Charter North with an EHCP and it has been really difficult. It does have quite a supportive culture though ime
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