Nursery vs Nanny Share

[Love_London]

I'm expecting my first baby soon and I am planning to go back to work full time after 8-9 months.

I was planning to go for nursery option (as opposed to childminder or nanny), but now I'm thinking about nanny share also.

I know that all nuseries / nannies charge different fees but in general, are the costs comparable or is nursery still a cheaper option? I am interested in the all-in cost including food, activities, etc.

Also, what is your opinion on mixing them two? e.g. nursery 3 days, shared nanny 2 days?

Thanks!

[Saffron]

For under two years old, I wouldn't mix nanny/nursery. Very young infants and toddlers do best with one main carer (besides parents). Nannyshare can be cheaper and more flexible than nursery sometimes. It all depends on the arrangements you need. xx

[esme]

I agree, stick to one for continuity... Nanny great esp for younger kids but equally nurseries can suit some babies (my first loved childminder, second is loving nursery, depends on the child).

Nanny will mean help with some chores and child in their own home but of course you are hiring just one person so need to be sure they will provide same level of care as you do.

Speak to lots of people, visit nurseries and childminders and you will get a gut feel for what is right for you and your family x

[VanessaPMR]

Nanny all the way, especially with a young baby. A nursery is unlikely to accept your child if they are sick, which they are often, so a nanny would be better for that reason..

Good luck!

[bensam]

If you are working full time I would go with a nanny share without a doubt. They are likely around the same price, though nanny share may be slightly higher. From the adults side the plus points of a nanny share is that at least half the time you don't have to drop off and pick up. Every day, 5 days a week, for months on end, getting your little one to and from nursery can be tiring and stressful. Second you will almost never have to appoligise to your boss about taking time off work to care for your sick baby as a nanny is perfectly able to stay at home cuddling, administering calpol ect to a sickly child, where a nursery sends them straigh home. As your little one gets older they will make increasing messes with messy play, food etc. Your nanny will keep all the child related messes in order and do their laundry too! If you have to stay late from work for anything your nanny is often able to babysit. If you train breaks down etc you do not have to stress about being late to pick-up. Your nanny will be able to continue the weaning process, intrudicing your baby to great home cooked food and be able to discuss any feeding issues. Your nanny will also be able to help easily with potty training. From the baby's view point nanny's are also amazing. They have one relationship with one carer. They will both bond and your nanny will get to know your baby really well. She will be able to talk about how your baby was that day (feeling a bit off, hitting new milestones, hit a playmate over the head with a toy) and then discuss issues and how to tackle them. Your baby will also develop a bond with the other baby/toddler you share with as they will constantly see each other. Your nanny will be able to reinforce the rules you set and help your baby develop a routine, disciple and manners. Amazing how they teach them to share, tiddy up and not throw food! Your nanny should also talk to them constantly in effective ways and help with their speech, encouraging and correcting them. Finally you nanny will be able to take them out everyday to the park. museum etc. Make sure you have a nanny which drives and who likes to get out and about. It is wonderfully stimulating for the children to be in the different parks, groups and at the museums. There is so much for young children in the area and you nanny will be able to take advantege of it. Find the right family to share with before you find the nanny then pick the nanny together. There are a lot of wonderful nannys working in the Dulwich area. But the family can be more tricky in terms of how close they are, there budget, the hours they want, their views on doing paid activities and outings. Nursery's are also great environments, but I think they work best for part time working mum's. I work full time and my nanny (and the various shares I have had) have been crucial in allowing me to go back to work full time. Nursery is very tiring for a baby/toddler and they are shattered by the end of the week. But no matter what you do I agree with the advice above, do not mix! Your baby will be developping it's ability to attach in those months when you first start back at work. They will not understand the merry go round of mummy, nursery, nanny. It will be very stressful for them and you.

[BellendenBear]

There isn't a right answer to this one. You have to do what works best for you financially and logistically and what feels right for your baby. I have 4 kids and have used different childcare for each of them and can not say which was the best. There were advantages and disadvantages to each, and each was chosen because that was what worked for us at the time.

1st child - nursery full time from 7 months. Changed to 3 days nursery / 1 day nanny after 2nd child arrived.

2nd child - 3 days nursery / 1 day nanny from 7 months and continues with this now aged 4.

3rd/4th children - nanny 4 days per week from 9 months.

The advantages to a nanny are that they have a very close bond with your baby, they will continue the routine that your baby is used to and you don't have to factor pick up and drop off into your day. For us another big advantage is that we don't have to worry about school holidays, inset days etc etc for the older ones. Also, I definitely found it easier to go back to work the 3rd time because I knew that for the babies their day would remain the same in an environment that they were used to.

Many of the other plus points that Bensam lists are true but not exclusive to a nanny and the same can be said of nursery and the bond they will have with their key worker, their development of social skills, potty training and exposure to different activities. For us kids getting sent home from nursery has never been an issue, maybe we have been lucky with our choice of nurseries or perhaps my kids don't get sick as often as others. In fact our nanny has had more sick days causing us to have to take time off work than my elder 2 ever have!

As for combining nursery with nanny, I think that can work fine. Many babies will be looked after by different grandparents on different days or a combination of grandparents and nursery for example. We used a combination of nursery and nanny after my 2nd child because the nursery only offered 2,3 or 5 days and we needed 4. This gave them the best of both.

For one child I would expect that nursery will be cheaper especially when you factor in food and fist of activities. Nanny becomes more cost effective when you have more kids.

Good luck with whatever you choose.

[Love_London]

Thanks all for your comments. Still confused as to what would work the best for us but i guess we will never have an easy answer to that question anyway.

One thing that I am concerned about nannies is the whole admin side of it (i.e. giving them holidays, paying national insurance, etc).

For nanny share, does one family normally take care of all the admin side and the other family pays monthly charge or do both families need to be involved?

[MarianaTrench]

I looked in to a nanny share at the time and found it aroudn 30% more expensive than the other childcare option I had chosen.

My alternative was a childminder, who charges ?50 a day. The comparison may be different to a nursery, as nurseries tend to be more expensive.

Another complicating factor was that my nanny share lady didn't want the nanny full time and I did, so I ended up paying 'more' in a relative sense.

We found that a nanny would typically charge ?10 (net) an hr, for taking care of 2 kids. So you would have to add the tax etc on top of that.

I found that when the child is sick you want to stay home with them anyway, rather than hand them over, but maybe that's just me.

[amydown]

Just to add that a sole charge nanny normally seems to charge ?10/h net if just working for one family but if it's a share, I believe they charge more per hour (eg. ?12/h net to be shared between families)

[Fra81]

I would just like to add that although it's true that with a nanny you don't need to rush home from work to pick up your sick child from nursery, nannies also get ill sometimes or need an emergency day/time off, hence the issue is still there.

[MarianaTrench]

Yes, you're right actually Amydown, I remember now.