Corporal punishment.

[Brendan]

*Bob* Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> You see parents clobbering their kids willy-nilly

> for what seem like the most minor of

> transgressions. You have to wonder where and when

> they started getting it so wrong.

I blame god. The design of the human body is all wrong. Being able to figure out, insert peg A into slot B, is just too easy. Now if the reproductive process involved being able to build effective human relationships and perhaps a basic knowledge of long division we may be better off.

[Mick Mac]

The only other point I would make is that people often differentite between disciplined smacking and smacking in anger - whilst I understand this argument it all feels equally painful to the child.

Brendan - I only used the word pathetic in response to your post as you had said my previous point was bollocks. I'm not normally dismissive of other peoples posts in that way.

I do think however that smacking will be illegal at some point in the future. I think its already illegal to use unreasonable force on a child, but my guess is that many children around the country are suffering too much physical punishment.

To a certain extent kids will be kids, they will occaisionally step out of line from time to time - its our job to make sure, in a humane way, that they should not repeat their mistakes. Think Moos made her points very well.

[Moos]

Think smacking is already illegal, Mick Mac. Happened about a couple of years ago?

[Mick Mac]

Really? Are you sure?

[*Bob*]

I believe you're only liable to be up before a magistrate 'if it leaves a mark'.

Yet another pointless piece of legislation to go in the bag with the foxhunting guff.

[Brendan]

I remember being a child very clearly. I remember the daily narcotic mix of excitement, emotions, temptations and challenges. I also remember getting hidings and knowing exactly why I was receiving them. While unpleasant they were never traumatic. They never made me doubt how my parents felt about me. I always preferred them to these other contrived kinds of punishment like having TV rights revokes. My sister went more for that kind of stuff and therefore my parents went that route with her. Me I preferred knowing that if I overstepped the mark I would get a smack. We all knew where we stood with that arrangement.

Having said that I didn?t get hit very often. For one I don?t think my dad liked doing it very much and secondly I like to think I was encouraged to be intelligent and creative, which meant that I didn?t get caught that often.

When it comes to schools I don?t see a major problem with the principle of a system of caning if implemented properly. But going through a schooling system where it was used liberally I saw it being abused all too often by power mad arsehole teachers.

[Tony.London Suburbs]

mockney piers Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Apologise that my point was so obvious it didn't

> require stating, as a non-parent I shall butt out

> this thread as clearly out of my depth *retires

> and licks wounds from non-violent disciplining*

Yes but you've been a child and had Parents so butt right back in MP..:)

[Tony.London Suburbs]

Brendan Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I remember being a child very clearly. I remember

> the daily narcotic mix of excitement, emotions,

> temptations and challenges. I also remember

> getting hidings and knowing exactly why I was

> receiving them. While unpleasant they were never

> traumatic. They never made me doubt how my parents

> felt about me. I always preferred them to these

> other contrived kinds of punishment like having TV

> rights revokes. My sister went more for that kind

> of stuff and therefore my parents went that route

> with her. Me I preferred knowing that if I

> overstepped the mark I would get a smack. We all

> knew where we stood with that arrangement.

>

> Having said that I didn?t get hit very often. For

> one I don?t think my dad liked doing it very much

> and secondly I like to think I was encouraged to

> be intelligent and creative, which meant that I

> didn?t get caught that often.

>

> When it comes to schools I don?t see a major

> problem with the principle of a system of caning

> if implemented properly. But going through a

> schooling system where it was used liberally I saw

> it being abused all too often by power mad

> arsehole teachers.

Everything that Brendan said, apart from the getting caught bit..:))

[Mikecg]

Moos Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Think smacking is already illegal, Mick Mac.

> Happened about a couple of years ago?

See this is where everything has gone wrong, in my day it was a case of if you are bad and get caught then the slipper or cane would be used to beat you into line, nowadays there is no fear in the kids because they know they cant be touched. I agree with Brendan that some teachers were sadistic bastards. I think the law was changed to protect kids from people who took it to the extreme.

[daizie]

Everything in moderation. My dad hit us at times, when we deserved it, and im pleased he did. It gave us respect for authority. It really did not do me any harm at all and my brothers and sisters say the same.

[Tony.London Suburbs]

daizie Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Everything in moderation. My dad hit us at times,

> when we deserved it, and im pleased he did. It

> gave us respect for authority. It really did not

> do me any harm at all and my brothers and sisters

> say the same.

Eggactly daizie and look what a fine upstanding person you've become, so a little tap didn't do you any harm.

[*Bob*]

Well me too (not very often, no harm done etc) but what we got was a more civilised, modernised and more carefully applied version of what my parents got.

ie Dad getting strapped by Grandad for something inconsequential became me occasionally getting a spanking for something I probably deserved.

However, I'll be following a yet more civilised, modernised and carefully applied version.. the one where you don't ever need to hit your kids to get a message across.

Just doing what your parents did because it was good enough at the time is nonsense. I mean, I used to enjoy Angel Delight in 1979 but I think there are better options available in 2009.

[daizie]

very funny tony and thank you for the compliment, surely your not suggesting i deserve a beating

[Tony.London Suburbs]

daizie Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> very funny tony and thank you for the compliment,

> surely your not suggesting i deserve a beating

Not at all!...I got the cane for gaining 23% in English Literature at Grammar School aged 11/12 at the end of year exam.

My performance improved dratically the next year, which is how I come to know the "Hoist by your own petard" Hamlet text on another thread.

I didn't fancy another 2 strokes, with a decent run-up that Bob Beamon would have been proud of...:))

[daizie]

see, it works! :))

[Moos]

*Bob* Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I believe you're only liable to be up before a

> magistrate 'if it leaves a mark'.

>

> Yet another pointless piece of legislation to go

> in the bag with the foxhunting guff.

I'm not the best at searching on the internet (where's Huguenot when you need him?) but here's the definition I found:

"The official legal position is you can smack your child but not around the head, not with a weapon (slipper, wooden spoon, cane whatever) and you mustn't leave any marks or bruises"

which seems reasonable to me if parents MUST smack.

[bigbadwolf]

Right, I started this but I suppose in hindsight I haven't really explained my position on it, well not seriouslly anyway.

I'm not a parent as I've stated before but I can at least add that I've been on the recieving end of a very balanced and fair upbringing, that's a fact I'm not going to argue about with any of you because none of you were there. You'll just have to take my word for it.

Corporal punishment was used to discipline us.

Yes, my parents also got the stick and I whole heartedly agree with those who say if you're beaten you'll probably do the same to your offspring.

I have NEVER raised a hand to either of my parents. My father was the one responsible for dishing out the cane and yes I suppose the fact that we got a walloping from time to time has caused us to think twice when back chatting but he has always encouraged healthy arguement and debate as has my mother and wouldn't even dream of raising his voice threateningly to stiffle any opinion. I have regularly argued with my Mum and Dad who've conceded that I was right.

I only recieved the cane 4 times in my life and even at the time I knew I deserved it.

1) I hid a girl in my infant classes inhaler for a laugh and during the evening after school she suffered an astmha attack.

I got 6 full strokes of the cane.

2) After repeated warnings about kicking a football towards a wall with a window near it I carried on and when the football went through the window a shard of glass nearly took a family members face off. 6 full strokes.

3) Starting the car with an infant cousin in the passenger seat and started driving off (only a few yards). 6 full strokes to my hands.

4) Setting fire to a bush in the park that got so out of control the fire brigade had to be called. 6 full strokes.

My parents never punched me in the face for not doing my homework or some other tawdry excuse to 'lay into me' and I can't stress hard enough that it was reserved for when I'd stepped way out of line after repeat warnings.

Lecture over.

[Mick Mac]

Nice of you to clarify you have never raised a hand to either of your parents BBW. Do you think we should all state that or does it go wihtout saying?

Enjoyed your 4 stories - although the first one made me take a puff on my inhaler.

[mockney piers]

My dad has admitted that he occasionally felt imminent physical violence from me, something he never really felt from my older brother despite a couple of handbags shovings they had (they had a more turbulent relationship on the whole than us), and he admitted that he on several occasions fucked with my head to see how far he could push me and on two occasions he knew he had to leave the room rather than take a punch to the face (when I was about 17), but then my dad could be a bit of a wanker frankly!!

At 78 he still likes to goad, and will still belittle my brother from time to time with barbed comments.

My brother and I have oft reflected that we learnt as much about what not to do as what to do re parenting from our dad.

As Philip Larkin said...

[daizie]

BBW, there is everything right and nothing wrong in what you have said, there just arent enough of the right kinds of people in society today .

[Mick Mac]

Is it love BBW - is this the love, you have been searching for?

[bigbadwolf]

Don't worry Mick. Going by some of Daizie's previous post's she comes across as the kind of girl who doesn't mind sharing. You up for it Daizie as I think Mick needs a bit of encouragement.

[Mick Mac]

uuum - 15 minutes and no response BBW - I better give up on that one. You have her to yourself mate.

[daizie]

omg you are treating me like a piece of forum meat

[Moos]

Daizie, may I offer you the words 'fuck off you tossers' for only a small fee? You may find them useful at this point. I could even add in 'I wouldn't touch either of you with a bargepole, crater-faced sockmunchers' but that would have to be extra.