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Awfully sorry Lizziedjango,


There were no lies or over exagerations, maybe some colourful language. If however the lady used a muslin cloth I would have been more than likely not to mention it here. If however a mother chooses to feed the baby with her assets in full view, without prior consideration for fellow coffee guzzling gossip moungers, and another changes a nappie at a dinning table. In my book this is not the way to behave in public, and un ladylike.

Two points.


First of all for those who don't bother actually reading a fullthread,I DID SPEAK TO THE WOMAN IN QUESTION!!!!! And I told her that I thought it was unacceptable and pointed out child changing facilities.


For those who think this is acceptable and that there is nothing wrong with changing a nappy in a food service place, let me offer this following scenario.


You are sitting quietly enjoying a coffee, glass of wine, bite to eat or whatever. At a table near you a small child's soiled, smelly nappy is removed, the sight of runny poo exposed for all to see, the delicate aroma of toddler turd drifting to your nostrils and mingling with the subtle flavours of your food and drink. If you don't find that unpleasant - GO SEE A DOCTOR!!!! Ninety-nine per cent of the human population find the notion of eating and drinking in comfort incompatible with the sight and smell of human excrement. There is also the hygiene issue that changing a nappy can involve accidental spills, stains etc that cannot always be properly noticed or cleared up. WHy do you think many food service establishments have a sign stating that for hygiene reasons dogs aren't allowed? If you are a member of the other one per cent, can I suggest you NEVER give dinner parties or become involved in the catering industry. It is for this very reason that many places (such as this establishment) provide private child changing facilities so that children can be changed in a sanitary way with appropriate privacy.


If you think there is nothing wrong with changing a baby's nappy, let me suggest this - next time I am in a public place and fancy a pee I won't bother going to the toilet. I will just take the old lad out, pee in a bottle under the table and dispose of it later. After all, what is wrong with the sight of a man's bits - we've all seen them. And I believe fresh urine is actually usually a pretty sterile fluid. Why should anyone get uptight about it?


Can those posters who think it okay to change a baby's nappy in a food service environment please give the rest of us a concrete assurance that they have no involvment in the catering, hospitality or food selling or preparation industries in East Dulwich? I think many of us would be comforted by the fact.

I don't mind public breastfeeding in principle, but it makes me want to watch. Then I think watching is rather intrusive and borderline perverse, and then I feel guilty.


Feeling guilty makes me unhappy, and then I resent the innocent mother for embroiling me in this moral quandary and ill-focused misery.


I can't really admit to these complex arguments, so instead I concoct other red herring arguments about public decency which make me sound like a lunatic, but not a pervert.

At the end of the day RosieH,


People will do what they see fit, I personnaly preferd to be discreet when my wife and I are in public with the children, however I don't like fighting with women because it is a loosing battle and always ends in tears. So to avoid a bun fight, I would prefer to avoid the tin opener.

i think the comment that breastfeeding is unladylike is really very amusing but am sure the public breastfeeding mothers of east dulwich is a whole different thread....


what really can be more lady like than breast feeding your baby- unless we still live in the 50s where women are still confined!!

As a non parent I have no objection to breast feeding in public, it is certainly preferable to screams of hunger, however there can be no excuse for changing a nappy in an area where food is being eaten. It is rude, thoughtless and unhygenic.

If there were some village stocks in the centre of ED for these kind of lapses in decorum it would make it easier to shame wrongdoers and people who act suspiciously.


I've been on the phone to someone or other at the council all morning about it, I advise you to do the same.

Breastfeeding in public shouldn't be scorned at, if a child is wailing with hunger, then feed it, although sometimes I do think some mothers have taken it a wee bit too far in that some now defiantly get their tits out wherever they want, whether child is hungry or not and in full view of everyone and then glare at people daring them to challenge their right to feed in public. If a child is hungry and needs nursing,then feed them, sometimes you can't even tell, some nursing mothers have it down to a tee, (not that you should have to hide it), its a natural thing to do and should not "offend" anyone, but as for changing nappies, soiled or otherwise in eateries, or any places where food or drink is consumed, that is just completely unhygienic and totally disgusting.

i did not misinterpret your breast feeding comment as you did quantify it well and i know what you mean.... the lady like comment just amused me.... i am all for public breastfeeding if you want a life as well as a baby but also feel that it can be taken to the extremes... i remember sitting in a pub and one of the people i was with breast fed by sitting the baby on her knee upright and letting it feed so the entire breast, bra, stomach and everything was on show including winding with the boob still out....


and just for the record, no i did not say anything to her......


still don't think it is very polite to change a nappy in public....

Ok Mikecg, I take your point re. "If however a mother chooses to feed the baby with her assets in full view...". I agree that it is quite easy to breastfeed discreetly, and that that is the more appropriate option in a public place. One does not have to have one's breasts on display when breastfeeding, and if that is what you found 'offensive' then I can see your point, to some extent.


As you say, it is possible to drape a muslin cloth or a scarf over the area...

Domitianus


Initially you said the nappy was 'soiled', and now you say it was"soiled, smelly nappy ..... the sight of runny poo exposed for all to see, the delicate aroma of toddler turd drifting to your nostrils and mingling with the subtle flavours of your food and drink."


Are you sure you're not exaggerating a little bit?


Shame you didn't say anything to the mother though. I wonder what she would have said to you if you had had words with her.>:D<

Oh come on people. I think the OP was completeley reasonable. No one wants to eat in the presence of human bodily waste, irrespective of the age of the individual who produced it. To try and imply that the OP is in any way in the wrong about this is just silly. Also - why the repeated queries as to whether or not he/she said antyhing? Despite the fact that the OP has repeatedly said they *did* address it with the mother, why the hell should they have to? What the woman did was antisocial in the first place and shouldn't have happened. Why is the onus being put on the perefctly innocent member of the public, spending good money to eat out, to confront this woman and further ruin their meal with an unwanted confronttation?

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