Night nanny vs doing it yourself

[Strawbs]

Baby Strawbs is 6m old and we are deep in sleep training, a recent illness has put us back to square one with him waking constantly in the night and if I leave him to cry he will cry for 2-3 hours at a time. If I feed him he will only take 1-2 oz so he's not hungry. We are literally on our knees and taking it in turns but the crying wakes the whole house sometimes and then I have toddler Strawbs to contend with.

I've heard good things about Nicola at child sleep solutions but do wonder what else I could be doing. I am tempted to bankrupt myself and get a night nanny in to crack the problem but is that actually what they do or do they just give you a break? I am guessing it's about ?1000 a week? It's a hefty price to pay!

My partner is off to Canada in two weeks and then me to oz and I am terrified at the thought of doing it on my own with no back up.

Does anyone have any experiences that they can share please and if they think it's worth getting a night nanny in?

Thanks

Xxx

[hellosailor]

Hi Strawbs,

If you pay a sleep expert to stay at your house then they're there to crack the problem, not just give you a temporary break, or they can obv advise you over the phone and you do the training rather than them stay over. My friend used someone she thought was brilliant, she stayed a couple of nights, then got them to implement the stuff for another night or two (it was already way better after her 2 nights) then she did another night, let me know if you want details xx

[verds]

We went DIY with Nicola and to make it affordable I gathered 6 other sleepless mums and she did us a seminar. One of my friends was desperate as she was about to go back to work, but she followed the advice and made improvements within a week. Hope things improve for you - my first was a good sleeper, but my second drove me to sleep-free breaking point! We finally cracked it at 14 months and I still have the eye bags.

[Strawbs]

Thanks both. Hs I've pmd you for the details. Toddler Strawbs didn't sleep for 2 years and I am desperate to not go through it again. I want to enjoy my babies but find it so difficult to have the patience needed when I am dragging myself around day after day. X

[nunheadmum]

I'd recommend biting the bullet and paying for the help. We did it when my second was 4 months after 2+ years struggling with my first. It was by far the best money we spent. It was sorted in 2 nights of the night nanny (after some prep by us) and more importantly, it gave us the confidence to trust our own instincts. And we could start to enjoy our kids, not being so knackered any more.

[Strawbs]

Nunheadmum did you use a company? Did it cost the earth? I am defo happy to throw some money at the situation but am hoping it won't break the bank. Thanks! X

[snowboarder]

I think we used the same nanny as nunheadmum - it was about 4 yrs ago but I think the company is still going, if not the specific nanny we both used - Nightnannies.com, and the nanny was called Maya. She stayed over for 3 nights in total and was available by text and once came round in the day to look at naps too - I'm pretty sure it cost about ?500 - combination of agency fees and nanny fees.

I know it's a lot but it absolutely sorted us out, and my now 5.5 year old has been an amazing sleeper ever since. He hardly ever messes about at bedtime, always asleep by 7.30, while my younger son plays up until about 8.30 - ironically he was the 'good' sleeper as a baby. I hadn't slept for a year by the time we called the agency, I couldn't have done it on my own, I simply didn't have the energy. I was also dedicated absolutely to making it work, having spent all that money!

To be honest, also, her style didn't really fit in with my more 'attachment' style breast feeding/cuddling parenting style, but I was ready to try anything. Over the first two night there was probably a total of about 3 hrs crying (in 1 hr bursts) - by the third night he slept though. That's probably less crying than what was a normal 3 nights with multiple wake ups. I don't regret it for one second.

[minder]

You do get used to late nights whilst having a 6 month old. Gone are the days when I had a good nights' sleep and my eldest is now 22 and I have the eyebags to prove it and I didn't pay out any money!

[Convex]

We are planning to get nicola in but are waiting until a few things settle down. Probably when I stop bf will do it. We never cracked our first though he is coming right now he is nearly 3. Won't manage another 2 years of night waking so will seek help with the 2nd.

I think when you are really tired having someone to help you is worth the money if you can spare it.

Even if you have to repeat the steps yourself when you are back from hols, at least you will have had some sleep stored up.

[Mark2010]

We used Nicola's services twice for our daughter (different problems each time) and it really changed our lives. She offers the seminar (which we used for our three year old when she was little and not sleeping more than two hours a time). We then had a personal consultation when our baby was born and our daughter stopped sleeping again. It was the best money we spent for a long time. On both occasions the issues resolved in three days following Nicolas advice. Other friends who also engaged Nicola had the same success. I cannot recommend her enough.

[Digbina]

I used a sleep trainer for both of my boys - it is definitely worth it. I used night nannies as well. We had Maya for our second as the trainer we used for our first (Chloe Hylton) wasn't available. I have to say I wouldn't recommend her - she won't work weekends so if it takes a while she'll leave you hanging and she got me up in the night to participate in the training. Definitely not what I was paying for! I agree with snowboarder about her style as well. She told me it was my fault my baby wasn't sleeping through as I was too responsive to him (!!!). We went then back to Chloe and had a much better experience.

Expect to pay around ?160 per night to the sleep trainer plus agency fees. It is worth it though.

[nunheadmum]

Yes I used Maya / Night Nannies the same as Snowboarder. For us her style worked(I was aware the problem was as much us as the baby and I wanted to know what I needed to do differently) and I never found any issues of availability as she was always available by phone whenever I needed (although possibly I didn't try her over the weekend). But that probably demonstrates a good point - if you're spending that amount of money, they should be willing to give you the opportunity to talk to them in advance and check that the way they work is inkeeping with what your looking for.

Good luck finding a solution.

[Strawbs]

I spoke to a night nanny today who was ?250 a night and said it would need a minimum 4 nights for progress. On mat leave we have decided to go with Nicola at child sleep solutions as she can come tomorrow for ?225 and people seem to rave about her. I am desperate for this to work so hopefully her 99% success rate will apply to us too!! X

[Julesnightnanny]

is Nicola staying over night and is that fee per night?

[Convex]

Ok good luck Strawbs. Fingers crossed it improves things.

[stress_head]

Having my fingers crossed for you!

[hellosailor]

good luck Strawbs, keep us posted xx

[EmilyPie]

Good luck, got everything crossed for you!

[Strawbs]

Jules night nanny - that is her cost for a face to face consultation, a detailed plan you implement yourself and give weeks of support.

After a diabolical night of him waking every 20-30 minutes I am desperate to hear what she says.

X

[patt1980]

Good luck Nicola worked for us pretty quickly so hope you get some sleep soon!

[Julesnightnanny]

Hi strawbs thank you for info.Its interesting what people are charging. I did a sleep training course on sat but was to late when I saw your thread. I was advised it will take 3-4 days to change a habit, be consistent and it will pay off. Good luck end enjoy your well deserved night sleep x

[Pickle]

Those of you who have used a sleep trainer for babies (say, under 1 year), I'm intrigued at the approach they use. I'm assuming daytime routine is looked at before doing anything with nights?

Sorry, not adding anything useful, I know, but it seems like such a lot of money! I put strict(ish) daytime routines in place with all 3 of my (breastfed) babies from around 2/3 months and found the nights sort of slotted into place based on that.

I hope you have some success Strawbs, sounds like you're having a terrible time x

[Strawbs]

Well so far so bloody amazing!! After 3 days of his day time routine being changed and 2 nights of training (last night being the 2nd) baby Strawbs only woke up once last night!!! Took me a while to get him back off but we have gone from hourly wake ups to 1 in 2 nights, absolutely extraordinary!! It's early days I know but I am seriously hoping by this time next week he will be sleeping through. For anyone in my position who was about to form out ?1000 on a night nanny give Nicola at child sleep solutions a call first, you just never know!!

I feel exhausted today even though he slept so much we I think I slept so lightly expecting him to wake and for the battle to commence but I defo think I'll be more at ease tonight!

X

[hellosailor]

Oh strawbs that is brilliant news, Nicola is fab! Yes it will probably take a little time for you to stop being on red alert and relax a bit at night even with him sleeping well! But sounds like it's well on its way to being sorted, so pleased for you! Days will be so much easier with him sleeping well at night too xx

[patt1980]

Great news! I am also in the camp of waxing lyrical about Nicola to other parents with bad sleepers, her methods really do work.