A Christmas tale (shopping in the Lane)

[TheePope]

Soooo, I ventured out of the house on Sunday for a little bit of last minute Christmas shopping. I figured with the propensity of gift shops opened over the last few years I'd be able to find something, but all in all is it really a good place to shop?

Now, I'm not knocking having nice interesting shops, but the expense and the bizarre nature of some of what was on offer! My favourites were:

From Moo - coloured plastic mixing bowls & spoons all fitting together, a snip at ?35

From Mrs Robinson - a ceramic, casted rollerskate & boot (didn't dare pick it up to see price)

From Mrs Robinson - a lamp bigger than my house (ditto)

Ethnicy gift shop near DIY store - a Celestial, 3 wicked candle, 3" high and 5" diameter, ?45

The ethical shop - a brushed steel dual bin (one for recycling geddit) - ?190

Ditto - a coat hanger rail on a tricycle to carry your shopping

Oliver Bonas - my mind had gone insane by then but I was impressed by 4 shop assistants and a security guard - it's tiny

There was other stuff too, all over the Lane, seriously who is buying this and what kind of a salary do you have to be on to not bat an eyelid paying for it? Please answers - it was surreal! What's the maddest item on the lane you've seen?

[Dez]

Eating and drinking outlets seem to be the ones making most profit and the places you've listed are just hobby shops I'd guess.

[EDOldie]

TheePope Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

>> From Mrs Robinson - a ceramic, casted rollerskate

> & boot (didn't dare pick it up to see price)

They've got those in the Conman, sorry, Conran shop too. What is all that about? Answers on a postcard please.

[tiger ranks]

Lordship lane is the new kings road didnt you know that dulwich has high standards to live up too have you not seen mrs Hyacinth Bucket (pronounced 'Bouquet') with richard on the lane >:D<(tu)

[TheePope]

EDOldie - thanks for the tip - I know now what it is! It's a roller skate door stop / book end!

http://www.conranshop.co.uk/ProductDetails.aspx?pid=400985&cid=GiftsHim&language=en-GB

How have I ever lived without one of these?!

Anyone own up to buying one?

[Brendan]

Those are so last year. What you want is one of these.

The now legendary half-brick.

http://simonfraser.net/ART/Gubbins/brick.jpg

The must have household item with an edgy past the half-brick is the ultimate in urban chic. Forged in the back alleys and builder?s yards of London it now finds its true home as a tasteful addition to the contemporary bookcase or fashionable hallway door.

But this multipurpose piece of art is not only a bookend or a doorstop. Why not give this Christmas that gangland feel by having your cards personally delivered, tied to an impressive half-brick and cast through the windows of your family and friends.

Locally sourced by an up-and-coming, cult, neo-retro-neo-modernist, East Dulwich designer the half-brick puts itself in a class above all other bookends and doorstops, be they shaped as roller-skates, rollerblades or heelies, by being reassuringly priced at ?1000 (excl delivery). So order now not to be disappointed.

[TheePope]

Now that is cutting edge.

I'll take 5,000.

[Brendan]

The half-brick is also at the head of credit crunch fashion. Let?s face it for everyone who is anyone it is all about the crunch this season. When it is time to take to the streets because the bank won?t pay Marcus? bonus and you can?t afford this year?s new Range Rover don?t be seen using a substandard projectile weapon. Use your half-brick to take out a riot policeman at 10 paces.

[eater81]

Whats that comedy sketch thats been on recently? May have been on the Enfield/Whitehouse show but I may be mistaken. Sums up perfectly the boneheaded morons that buy the useless junk sold in such shops as the ones discussed above.

[Keef]

It was indeed Harry Enfield.

[HonaloochieB]

A pint of Stella is on average ?3.30 in ED. I like that.

I find it reassuringly expensive.

[karter]

and a glass of wine is still ?4.50, mad or what?

[huncamunca]

Gavin Turk,no stranger to SE London, Produced this exciting little puppy lately

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_MtrwIQYbAWs/SRtIlCm5RoI/AAAAAAAAAaA/V6H7YMg9OY8/s400/_Brick_6

Editon of 10 / ?500 each

Now sold out.

[HonaloochieB]

Five grand? Just like that, on the hip. Sweet as, Turky, sweet as.

[summerjt]

Love this thread. Brendan - laughed out loud at the picture of the brick. I've previously described LL to friends as full of shops selling ?60 corkscrews. I absolutely love browsing these shops, though, and I do occasionally buy something. I like living somewhere where there are interesting, quirky shops selling interesting, quirky things. If I think about the choice of shops in Camberwell, the best thing was the Woolworths and even that is going now...

[????]

I wonder what will be left at the end of this year?

[Jeremy]

Nothing but Sainsburys and the bookies probably, quids...

[Asset]

Actually I have a theory that the independent shops will survive this. The chains that are all crashing around us at the moment will have had much of their profits invested in, say, Icelandic banks or the stock market. Independents are less likely to have lost vast amounts of their profits in this way and run on a level of credit which is cheaper now than it has been for a while. Maybe it will be the end of the chains and the small supplier will benefit.

[????]

Asset, it's their gearing that's hurting the chains not any lost 'investments' and I expect that many of the small chains are in the same boat - soooo the obvious ones in LL (better not name or admin may tell me off) are in relatively similar picture...over expanded on high levels of debt that are now unsustainable. The true independents? Maybe...but theyll have to lower their prices

[Asset]

but debt is cheap now, gearing may be high but the payments are manageable or should be due to constant reducing of interest rates. Equity is what larger companies are losing due to stock value reducing and investments which go wrong no? Small companies don't normally have a high amount of equity do they?

[????]

Credit is cheap in the 'shop window', you try getting it if you're a retailer!!! The problem is that with deflation and especially asset (see what I did there) deflation any debt starts to get scary (and bigger) unless you're repaying...that's the problem for consumers, businesses and retailers in 2009...although, ironically in 2010 we could have massive inflation with the ? going down the swanny). I'd not want to be in retail or any debt at the moment despite the fact that money is nominally 'cheap'.

[????]

Sorry, forgot to add retail sales will be down about 10% next year plus not much demand for 'premium' kitchen nicknacks or marked up average restaurant food or delicatessan food, servicing debt with your income imploding??....carnage I tell thee

[macroban]

2009 should be an interesting year for Parkhill Properties.

[Asset]

I think interest rates should be going up not down. Live and do business according to our means etc. I hope most of the independents will weather this. Time to buy local.

[Jeremy]

Yes, well... interest rates will have to go up soon, won't they... as soon as the B of E feel that the stock market has stabilized, and that banks have started to lend money again, rates will go back up again. There may well be a higher-than-expected rise at some point, to breathe some life back into the pound.

But I think it's a mistake to look at this purely in numbers. Surely there are more factors in whether a shop survives than interest rates and debts. In my opinion there are maybe 5 or 6 "star" independent(ish) establishments in the area which will surely see the recession through. I think it's inevitable that some places won't make it, but hopefully the core of quality establishments will still be there at the other side...