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What an awful experience. I have 3 kids and have many similar tales.... Including one where my (ASD) 3 year old was talking on the plane (yes, just talking) on a particularly stressful flight for me (alone, pregnant, 2 toddlers) and the man in front told him off very rudely 'as he needed the peace and quiet'. I looked over and he was reading the airline magazine. Charming. On the encouraging front, onvr when I was being told off by an old lady in John Lewis because the baby was 'making a racket' (he was), a passerby kindly reminded her that she too, was once a noisy baby. People forget, don't they? Good luck!
Well, I had an opposite situation, but equally upsetting, my 1 year old was sleeping in his pushchair very calmly, when this old woman sitting in front of him was looking at him and then asked me if he is alive, as he looks too peacefull. This was 2 years ago, but I still remember the hurt I felt when she said that. Some people have no filter and I wish they minded their business,especially when a child is having a nap. Some people need drama.

just to give a different perspective...


I was on the bus the other day and a baby in a pushchair (about 6m) was crying intensely, and the mother didnt look at the baby once!! this really angered me but my stop was the next so i didnt say anything....


it just made me so angry because all the baby needed was some distraction or for someone to talk to her.


obv it doesnt excuse the way people attacked you on the bus which was deffo the wrong way to handle the situation.

My husband took our two boys to a cafe on a busy Sunday morning once, and as soon as they walked in this man started muttering about noisy kids etc. I grant you, my boys are not the quietest but they would have settled down after a few minutes. Anyhow, my husband made sure they were seated far from the man then went to get some water. Man was still muttering as my husband passed close by. Summary of ensuing conversation:

Husband: "Is there a problem?"

Man: "I didn't come to a cafe to hear loads of kids shouting and screaming" [they weren't]

Husband: "Well you better f*** off then hadn't you."


I'd never have dared done that! I would have just been really hypersensitive and tried to shush my kids to whisper-level. And silently fumed with myself wishing I'd told the man to f*** off. Should add that kids were out of earshot of conversation. My husband hardly ever swears!

bkkmei Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> My husband took our two boys to a cafe on a busy

> Sunday morning once, and as soon as they walked in

> this man started muttering about noisy kids etc.

> I grant you, my boys are not the quietest but they

> would have settled down after a few minutes.

> Anyhow, my husband made sure they were seated far

> from the man then went to get some water. Man was

> still muttering as my husband passed close by.

> Summary of ensuing conversation:

> Husband: "Is there a problem?"

> Man: "I didn't come to a cafe to hear loads of

> kids shouting and screaming"

> Husband: "Well you better f*** off then hadn't

> you."

>

> I'd never have dared done that! I would have just

> been really hypersensitive and tried to shush my

> kids to whisper-level. And silently fumed with

> myself wishing I'd told the man to f*** off.

> Should add that kids were out of earshot of

> conversation. My husband hardly ever swears!



Good on your husband for confronting the man and ending it all within 10 seconds!

I was on holiday in Spain at the wknd and in a shopping centre could hear a toddler crying in his buggy. I looked over to see a man (assuming his dad) pick up the teddy he had thrown on the floor, shove it back then smack in the poor child in the face area. I looked at the mother who was watching me with a shocked look on my face and the father did this another two times all whilst the toddler kept screaming! Holding my son around the same age I said 'oi you don't do that'! To which the mother asked what my problem was! I was so angry I was shaking! I told her she is my problem and you don't do that but it fell in deaf ears. My husband didn't see the smacking and thought I was just overreacting to something so ushered me away from the situation. It was only after when I explained he said he felt terrible for not confronting the father and should he go back there. I was still so angry but realised if we confronted them it wouldn't have gone well as she was already defensive and could have erupted into a huge row and with kids there not a good idea as if the father had tried to get physical then my husband would have battered him and being in a Spanish police station with limited Spanish between the pair of us and a toddler this was not the way to go. Plus we thought that us calling them out on their behaviour would probably make no difference and that they were just plain ignorant bullies.


I'm not one to ever interfere in how strangers treat their children infront of me, but if a child was being hit then yes I would always say something to the parent. I certainly wouldn't shout abuse though! Babies/toddlers cry on buses that's perfectly normal, but I will admit if I saw someone totally ignoring their crying child on the bus I would have thought to myself just pick him up for a cuddle or try to reassure him but I wouldn't interfere in that situation.

There'll always be mutterers who resent their peace being disturbed by a baby or toddler. Provided you're doing your best to keep your little one happy and occupied, just ignore them or ask them directly what their issue is. Most in my experience just say 'nothing' and go on muttering. I once sat opposite a woman who spent the entire train journey talking loudly on her mobile, and then started tutting when my boy got wriggly (but not loud). Once I'd sated myself by having a daydream about crushing her phone under my foot, I just ignored her. Some people just have a bent about noise from kids, just like I have a bent about loud phone conversations.

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