Pamper parties for 8 year old girls?

[emc]

Hi there

I don't really love the idea but my daughter wants a pamper party for her eighth birthday in July - I've contacted a couple of companies in the area who do these - one does it 'in house' and the other comes to your home to do the party. Just wondered if anyone had any experience of local companies doing this sort of thing - good or bad? There will probably be about eight little girls in total.

Many thanks

[Lindsey<3]

Just an idea hun but maybe you or a friend could run it yourself, go to like the pound shop or savers and get some cheap face packs, nail polish, spray in hair colour (that washes out)hair glitter, nail gems, even cheap make up. Im guessing it would work out a whole lot cheaper? Cucumber on eyes? Mini hand massages? Pretend to treat them as adults? Lol. Sounds fun! Music channel on in the background? They'll think theyre all grown up. Xx

[Mrs TP]

My daughter went to one when she was 9 where they had a non professional family friend do it as described by Lindsey<3, was fine and all loved it. Just need 1 or 2 peeps who will indulge the girls.

[womanofdulwich]

I don't have daughters, but the thought of a pamper party seems SO wrong to me for an 8 year old. Is this what 8 year old girls want?

[redjam]

Not what mine want, thank God.

[Lindsey<3]

All little girls love to be princess and want to feel all grown up. I think its fine personally as long as its done in a child friendly way, like nail varnish is fine but not fake nails etc... maybe they can do make overs on each other which is all good kids fun? x

[Mrs TP]

Yeah no probs with nail varnish and shimmery glittery stuff not boob jobs, Botox and Miley Cyrus. And if you embrace it the fad soon passes but each to their own. Think I am remembering correctly the pamper party my 9yr old went to also had someone showing / handling reptiles.

On the theme of parties though, that daughter just turned 10 and we did t-shirt screen printing at Captured on the a Rye which was beyond fab.

[Mariamadeit]

Mothers inc on forest hill road, do these parties, have you tried there?

[Growlybear]

I don't agree that all little girls want to be princesses and feel grown up. At 8 I would never have let my daughter wear any type of make up or nail varnish, and it's not something that she would have wanted either. I have always found it very disturbing to see little children wearing clothing and cosmetics that are way too old for them.

[emc]

Didn't really mean to start a debate on the rights and wrongs of pamper parties for eight year old girls. It's a bit of fun and playing at 'dress up' as lots of boys qnd girls do. It's not as if I allow my daughter to clatter around in heels, false eyelashes and a push up bra on Lordship Lane. If anything she's more of a tomboy, and as someone else said its a passing whim. It's a two hour party for Gods sake, nothing more.

[womanofdulwich]

But its not is it? It's a statement that you think its ok for 8 year old girls to aspire to this. I am sure you are not alone in this. Just be aware where its going.

[Kate08]

Where is it going?

[Pickle]

:(

I have a 6 year old girl who loves having her finger and toenails painted - I let her have nail varnish on her toes, but won't put nail varnish on during term time. I don't wear nail varnish on my fingers, but do get pedicures over summer. When she plays with friends they have fun with lip gloss and glitter, not something she gets from me, but just harmless little girl fun.

I remember playing with makeup when I was little. I went on to get a university degree, and haven't felt the need to get fake boobs or marry a footballer. These days I don't wear makeup at all, so it was a passing phase ;)

In my mind, it's not far different from letting them get pretty face paint put on at a school fair.

A friends daughter had a lovely time at a party held at Mothers Inc, from what I heard the prices are reasonable and they get a mini manicure and lip gloss etc.

[Pickle]

(My son spent most of last summer with painted toenails too!)

[hellosailor]

Come on people, loosen your judgey pants, poor emc?

She started her post by saying 'I don't love the idea?' but is trying to accommodate what her daughter wants for her birthday. I'm sure it would be more edifying if her daughter had asked to work at a soup kitchen for her birthday but she's 8, so she's asked to have her nails painted. Doesn't mean she isn't going to be the next female prime minister.

[Lindsey<3]

If you didnt have advice to offer as the post was asking why comment?

[srisky]

Pickle Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> :(

>

> I have a 6 year old girl who loves having her

> finger and toenails painted - I let her have nail

> varnish on her toes, but won't put nail varnish on

> during term time. I don't wear nail varnish on my

> fingers, but do get pedicures over summer. When

> she plays with friends they have fun with lip

> gloss and glitter, not something she gets from me,

> but just harmless little girl fun.

>

> I remember playing with makeup when I was little.

> I went on to get a university degree, and haven't

> felt the need to get fake boobs or marry a

> footballer. These days I don't wear makeup at

> all, so it was a passing phase ;)

>

When I was about 8/9y old (primary school age anyway) I remember pretending to be Sandy from Grease and even blew out talc powder rolled up in paper pretending it was a cigarette. I loved Grease, still do, but I'm nothing like Sandy. The biggest influence in my like were my parents and their behaviour and expectations. Having said all that and knowing I turned out ok, I'm not sure how happy I'd be letting my kids watch Grease where the depiction of 'cool' is smoking ciggies, bunking off school and snogging in the back seat of a car....what were my parents thinking?!

[emc]

Yes, kate08 - can you please enlighten me as to where you think this is 'going' as I'd be terribly interested? As many other sensible posters have mentioned playing dress up may (or may not) be a part of lots of childrens' development. For your information my daughter is incredibly, bright, motivated and driven, she has lots of friends of both sexes (wouldn't ever be described as girly, but if she was, so what?) and sees her hard working single mum (yes, me!) go to work, in a fairly high powered job and believes she can do and be anything she wants . That, to me, is one of the most important lessons I can teach her and I lead by example....if she wants to mix up a fruity face pack and paint her nails with her friends for her 8th birthday because she has a passing whim to do it who cares?? If you really think that this is some kind of statement or setting a precedent about how women should 'be' then I pity you. Teach girls (and boys!) to be self sufficient and that they can achieve anything they want is what it's all about - to me anyway. Like I said, didn't mean to start a debate, but hey, it's an interesting one!

[hellosailor]

srisky Wrote:

-

>

> When I was about 8/9y old (primary school age

> anyway) I remember pretending to be Sandy from

> Grease and even blew out talc powder rolled up in

> paper pretending it was a cigarette.

I did this with talc too!!

[sillywoman]

My daughter would have luuurved a 'pamper party' at this age. She seems a normal enough kind of girl to me, though now I'm wondering what secret darkness her early love of girlyness could be indicating? Hmmmm ? I'll watch her closely for any signs of wagness. Oh yes - now I think of it she does love 'Made in Chelsea' - she and her friends all gather to watch it together. She even got me to buy her the Binky book - oh no! It's a slippery slope to doom and destruction from here emc . . .

Seriously though, WOD - who I know to be a normally sensible and utterly reasonable poster - may be hinting at the feminist issue here to do with self regard and encouraging our daughters to love themselves for who they are without unnecessary adornment. But, at her own admission she doesn't have daughters so I hope you'll take it in the right spirit WOD if I say, I think you may be worrying unnecessarily. Most (not all) little girls love a bit of dress-up, sparkle and slushiness, it doesn't herald a life of Katie Price emulation. With the right encouragement from their parents (and I know that emc is a lovely, grounded and conscientious Mum) they can grow up to be articulate, intelligent, strong and lovely women, most will support feminism and have sufficient idea of their own worth to make a bit of pampering now and again something they will delight in. The worst I see a 'pamper party' leading to is a lifelong love of spa-days. Now that's not such a bad thing is it?

[emc]

Sorry kate08 my previous post was directed at Woman of Dulwich not you! Apologies. And Thankyou Sillywoman - v well articulated and interesting to hear from the perspective of a mum of a teen girl. I just think there are much more important things to get concerned about when raising daughters. And happy to admit I do LOVE a spa day....

[hellosailor]

wot Sillywoman said

[MothersInc]

Ok, this is an interesting debate, I thought it may be best to stay out of it but feel it right to comment.....

I am a mother of two, a boy aged 4 and a girl aged 7. Before anything, I am a mother and that to me comes first. I decided to throw my daughter a pamper party at Mothers inc. for her 7th birthday, now before this, she had never worn nail varnish or anything like that (she has never worn makeup and never will until she is about 50!).

For her pamper party, we painted the children?s nails in clear varnish - we would never put colour on the child?s nails, unless the parent stated otherwise as it is to their discretion. We made organic masks - boys were also in attendance and helped make the masks and put them on etc. The main part was in the childcare room where we played all the classic games musical statues/bumps etc. The important thing here is to keep it child friendly and fun. My daughter is extremely smart and I have every confidence in her growth and development, it is for us as parents to guide them and let them know right from wrong etc.

A pamper party done in the right way, will just be a wonderful memory and will surely have a positive impact on them rather than a negative one.

[Convex]

I'm with the 'fairly harmless' gang

I had a makeup kit when I was about 5!

[shaunag]

My 3 year old is obsessed with nail varnish....I am not...she developed the obsession from copying her best friend...a boy! I'm not worried-it's a phase and healthy for kids to explore. Pamper party sounds like great fun! Hope she and her pals enjoy it!