Organising a big household /me full time in work

[Fuschia]

Help!

As of next week I will be out of the house from 6am to 6pm 5 days per week (term time) where I have always worked at home 2-3 days Pw

We have two brilliant au pairs and now live by my sister but there are 8 of us in total with children 12, 6, 6, 3 and scouts, ballet etc to sort out

Meal planning

Cooking

Washing

1001 other things

Any tips to help us get used to

Me bring AWOL so much? We are setting up a shared google calendar and I will do some batch cooking /doubling up

[Convex]

There is an amazing thread on mumsnet with tips on getting organised. Try searching on that...?

[Mellors]

Hi Fuschia

you knew I would pop up in this thread!

I'm in the same boat (although I only have three kids).

My top tips:

1. meal planning service. I use menusformums.co.uk - tell you what to make for dinner each week day night. All simple, easy and cost effctive. Easily swapped for veggie etc. Takes the brain power out of it and comes with a shopping list you can directly import into online shopping. On Sunday I prep Monday/Tuesday. Wednesday au pair cooks for everyone, and I make Thursday/Friday the easiest nights e.g. pasta/pesto/veg. Breakfast - everyone has porridge. Which brings me on to...

2. Online shopping. Ocado monthly pass all the way. Order the day before for next day delivery. Automatically add everything you normally use into basket and then just shuffle through to add/subtract things based on the weeks meal plans. Get it delivered when au pair is at home so its one less job for you.

3. Get kids to have school lunches, or get au pair to do the night before if not. All coats, book bags, PE kit, ballet stuff blah blah done night before and put by front door/in the car.

4. Use Ocado for e.g. birthday cards, stamps, presents, shampoo, emergency gin.

5. Amazon Prime next day delivery for everything else other than basic kids clothes etc which I M&S. This way you literally never need to go in a shop.

6. Have a cleaner. Non-negotiable. Make kids tidy up every evening and everyone has to pitch in with dishwasher etc. The only way I keep sane is by having a tidy house in the evening. Cleaner changes all sheets once a week and au pair does all laundry, and puts away all kids stuff (with their help). She dumps our clean things on our bed and I put it away as soon as I get home.

8. Deal with life admin immediately so it doesn't get lost - I put all forms from school, party invites, bills etc in my bag, take it to work and deal with it the following day before I start work. School forms get delivered by the au pair the next day. I also have a massive wall calender in the kitchen with everything immediately gets written into. If its not in (yes, husband, I mean you and your random cycling events then you shouldn't expect to go).

8. Spend spare bits of time on train/lunch etc reading/doing something for you, not working - its one rare bit of downtime I get as a working mum.

9. Make partner (if any) pull their weight. You have to be a team.

10. Finally - try to spend weekends doing fun things, or you will all go mad/feel life is nothing but work.

Will see if I think of any more :)

[Fuschia]

Thanks for that.

Currently I meal plan manually, or a monthly cycle (roughly) and then use Tescos with deliveries on Saturday and weds.

It's a big delivery for 8 of us, so the main delivery comes on Saturday when I am home. A top up one comes weds. I think I might need to give the au pairs access to the tesco account to adjust and top up midweek.

Perhaps I should shift to ocado... Or find another way to get organised re cards and things. Maybe do the year all I. Advance.

Packed lunches get done in the morning here, night before would be better. And get bags ready the night before.. No q1 child is starting secondary in sept and he is so disorganised it's unreal.

Amazon prime, tick

Cleaner, we don't have... Probably we will need to.

My admin is in a bit of a muddle, I need a bigger noticeboard and a safe place for school letters, and as I will be on the train now rather than driving, that's a good time for admin. Doubt I can do admin at work as the start of the day is always manic.

Partner is hands on, and will be at home more, but he is impossible when it comes to doing small tasks... I asked him in February to organise some birthday presents/cards for the start of march... In the end I did one of them myself 6 weeks later, and the other one never got done.

Thanks for the tips. I need to up the organisation at least 2 gears I think.

Luckily au pairs and fab and very organised... And don't mind sorting out washing, putting away clothes.

I just need to get a second car (!) to make all this work.

[Fuschia]

Convex Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> There is an amazing thread on mumsnet with tips on

> getting organised. Try searching on that...?

Ah, good plAn.

[EmilyPie]

Ocado is more expensive but the ocado iPhone app is brilliant. Let's you do all the stuff mellors said as well as adding stuff when you remember with a one click system, which really helps when you realise you're about to run out of bin liners etc as you can add it immediately rather than trying to remember to do it later.

[srisky]

Reading this thread with great interest - we 'only' have two kids but both hubby and I have pretty full jobs/hours. Liking the idea of a live-out au pair, if there's such a thing (no room for a live-in), can anyone give me a tough estimate of how much they charge? Thanks

[Mellors]

No such thing as a live out au pair. The whole point is that they live in, as part of your family, and that you give them free board and lodgings, take them on trips, speak English with them etc. Kind of like a big sister?

[Convex]

We tried tescos and found ocado to be the same, and a much mire user friendly system. But we buy some things in bulk to save eg coconut milk and other bits from the Chinese supermarket, and stuff from the cash and carry.

Mellors, your post is awesome, I'm copying it into my notes for when I go back to work after this one!

[bawdy-nan]

Having done this for years (working full time with kids but with no au pairs) I'd say another really important thing is accept that some things just have to slide. Decide what's important and let the rest loosen up a little. Buy a load of bithday cards and keep them in a drawer - use a mass google calendar and bin as much book bag admin as you dare - aka understand the PTA as something for people without jobs.

[bodsier]

I hate to do this....somehow it feels like I am perpetuating womens inequality ...but it helped me to figure out where to start....I guess the way round it is to ensure that everyone who is capable knows the routine (even a child can wipe down a sink) and tidy their room..... Easy steps helps, but decluttering essential....

http://www.flylady.net

[Yak]

I'm bookmarking this thread! Google calendar didn't really work for us but a written calendar which is The Holy Grail did.

The only thing I can contribute really is about cards and presents. I do a job lot whenever there is a sale on an online and have a permanent present box of things that are non gender and not too age specific (kaliedescope, wooden whistles, build a glider plane etc). I guess that gets tougher as kids get older though. Postage stamps are always added to the Ocado order once a month.

For cards, I buy blank 50 cards and then have a stamping kit with letters, numbers, pictures etc. Sounds a bit airy fairy but it means that a thank you / get well soon / birthday / wedding / new baby card is never far away. They can look as amateur as you like and then just blame the kids. Quite cheap to do too

Oh and we have a "hot weather box" and a "cold weather box" for each person with all their bits and pieces like shoes / gloves / hats by the door and it is up to each person to keep their box in order. Store away boxes as seasons change.

Washing machine - use the delay start. Put washing on last thing at night but delay start for 7 hrs without it sitting in the machine getting creased. Feels less like a chore to hang it out first thing and means you can get to bed at a decent time.

Cleaner - definitely worth investing in this, if you can afford it.

Chalkboard for admin tasks that are not paper / email related and easy to lose track of.

Decide what it is you care about and don't sweat the small stuff

[sanity girl]

Wish there was a "like" option for your post bawdy-nan! The PTA comment made me laugh.

I am not nearly as organised as some of you, but my non-negotiables are use ocado/online deliveries for as much shopping as possible and have a cleaner.

bawdy-nan Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Having done this for years (working full time with

> kids but with no au pairs) I'd say another really

> important thing is accept that some things just

> have to slide. Decide what's important and let the

> rest loosen up a little. Buy a load of bithday

> cards and keep them in a drawer - use a mass

> google calendar and bin as much book bag admin as

> you dare - aka understand the PTA as something for

> people without jobs.

[bodsier]

Can't help thinking that having the daily routine on display helps everyone to chip in.....

[ryedalema]

I'm loving this thread...have been working full time since both of mine were 5 months and my OH works full time and is away a lot (as am I) so agree with loads of these, and have a couple of adds:

- definitely have a stash of cards, and also have a present box. Whenever I see promising gifts I buy a couple and keep them for the right birthday party

- Ocado (and its app) is fab, as is Amazon

- We have a family google calendar and 'invite' it to work meetings that affect school runs and family time

- We also have a set 15 minutes at the start of the working day on a fortnightly basis when we compare calendars manually to check we haven't missed anything

- pay forward play dates whenever you have the chance...it'll help if you need to call upon someone in an emergency

- don't feel guilty..I perpetually feel guilty that I'm not doing my best at work, or at home

- find special time in each week with each member of the family (including the OH)

And very good luck to you! It can work!!!

[Mellors]

Yes, yes to PTA! I had to stop doing so much with them once I went back to work full time. Now I provide cakes for cake sales (thankfully Ocado is fine for ours rather than handmade), and help out with weekend activities a couple of times a year. I can't be on the committee or be class rep though.

This is a benefit of working full time, I think ;)

Also yes to hot weather/cold weather boxes. I have one massive box by the back door full of wellies. I have another by the front door full of hats/gloves/scarves in winter. Ideally millions of the same type so any kid can pick up any. I have a "kit" of sunscreen and hats for summer.

A new one I learnt recently .......have sets of spare house and car keys. *somebody* (yes - you baby child) managed to lose mine the other day. Cue massive pre-work disaster/panic.

Also keep spare things at work - chargers for phone/kindle e.g., stash of food in desk in case you miss lunch, your chequebook in case you can't pay a bill online.

[womanofdulwich]

I know a few people that have housed live out au pairs- where a family effectively needs an au pair but does not have room, they reach an agreement with a friend that lives very close by. The employer pays the friend rent ( say ?150 a week) in return for a room and bills. The au pair sleeps and spends weekends in her own pad but spends the rest of the time in the family house.This includes eating there.

[Convex]

Yes, or a shared au pair. Eg they could live with one family but split time between 2 families?

[Fuschia]

I have a box for each child for current bags, gloves, hats etc and a box of summer stuff and a box of winter stuff and willies and waterproofs in the cupboard opposite (have fantastic huge utility room/boot room now)

Also have boxes in the shed labelled beach toys, sailing, wetsuits, beach shoes, camping etc (expedit unit) which mops up the overflow

It dies seem to be great minds think alike..

I need to update my present box and also have a better system for school notes.

I keep snacks and spare clothes in the car, cheque book in my bag

[womanofdulwich]

that's a funny place to keep a willie ;)

[srisky]

Not a bad idea after 4 kids...

[Fuschia]

Ha

I just spat tea over my ipad

There are willies all over the place in our house, it's true... We are outnumbered if you count the cat!

[DenmotherSmith]

My top tip with four kids at three different schools and a ridiculous amount of incoming letters/book bag junk entering the house every day is to photograph EVERYTHING with my iPhone , Invites, hospital letters, parent evenings, receipts, I take a snap of it all and save in a 'letters' album on the phone, later backed up to computer.I go through the photos once a week a make sure I've noted everything. Somehow letters seem to disappear off the enormous notice board taking over the kitchen......

[Fuschia]

Haha

I do that too!

Then email pics to myself

[Strawbs]

Hats off ladies, this thread is like organisational porn to me! I shall be referring to this as I return back to full time work with two children in January. X