Stay or go?

[Smiler]

We moved to small town surrey because of house prices and because Mr Smiler hated london living, 1.5 hour commute door to door (no tube though, which is a plus). Two small children. No local family.

Pros: childcare (much more choice, cheaper, better quality). Space (detached house, garden, green space). Less pollution. Less pressure on public services (can always get a dr appointment, and see regular dr if you want to). Much less traffic - can do quick trips by car, eg DIY shop, family weekend outings, that in ED would take ages. schools mostly have good green space. Local cinema/theatres. Community more mixed age-wise than ED, e.g. elderly ladies and gents verypleased to see babies around!

Cons: very quiet - streets often empty, everyone in their houses or driving. Poor public transport (suspect is crap for teens). Commuting eats up family/work time and exhausting. Public parks not as good as ED ones. Few/poor restaurants and take-aways. Community less diverse.

Lots of people here have one partner (almost always the man) commuting and the other at home or in a local, very part-time (and low paid) job. This wasn't what we wanted, but looks easier, except for the finances!

[????]

It,s not all that rational. There are city people, there are people who like the city for a while at a certain period in their lives ( that may be quite a long period)and there are some people that just don't like city life. Despite a couple of attempts I am a city person, expensive smaller house and sirens et al.

[ClareC]

rahrahrah Wrote:

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> ClareC - Where is it you have moved to?

A village @ 5 miles from Ashford in Kent. It's a high speed line into St Pancras stopping only at Stratford.

[ClareC]

Otta Wrote:

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> Think a big part of it is whether you are from

> London origionally, and whether you have extended

> family here.

>

> Both my wife and I were born and brought up in ED

> / Forest Hill, and as such, I feel a sense of

> roots in the area (we live in Sydenham which I

> love, but we rent). Next year we are hoping to get

> a finger nail grip on the bottom rung of the

> property ladder, and common sense is telling us to

> move away and get something decent for our limited

> budget. I can handle leaving, I've left before.

> BUT, my parents (ED) and my wife's dad (Sydenham)

> are close by and see a lot of our daughters. I

> love that they have this relationship (having only

> ever known one of my grandparents, who lived in

> Devon so I saw her once a year), not to mention

> the free childcare two days a week! I also get

> free transport in London because I've got crap

> eyes, and that would make a huge difference if I

> moved outside of zone 6 and lost that.

>

> I just wish I'd been sensible as a younger guy,

> but I basically pissed all my wages up the wall

> throughout my twenties. House prices in London are

> nothing short of crazy.

Totally agree!

I think if you grew up in London / have family there then it's a much bigger decision. I grew up in Kent although not the part we live in now My family are a similar distance away as when we were in ED but it takes 30 mins not an hour plus.

[canela]

and similarly if you didn't grow up in London, there can often be just an assumption that at some point you will leave it again. lots of people come to London for work when they are young but never envisaged having a family here. trouble is, London can be very difficult to leave - especially work wise.

[prm]

Ann, I would love to hear what it's like for teenagers in London and how is it different from other parts of the country?

I'm not from the UK so it's hard for me to have an opinion...at the moment I think we will probably stay for primary school but my worry is for when they are older and I wonder how dangerous it could be for them to be out and about in London on their own.

Ann Wrote:

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> I was lucky to have bought in this area 20 years

> ago and haven't faced the cost of living issues

> current families do.

>

> However the accessibility we have here is great,

> like many of you I didn't grow up in London.

>

> For teenagers London's amazing!

[Vickster]

We moved out last year to Bedford - further than most of the places listed above but fantastic rail links so we both still commute to London. 35 mins to St Pancras on the fast train, and also slower Thameslink trains which I actually get as it is direct to Blackfriars where I work. Door to door for me, 1.5 hours. Was extremely cheap when we bought last year, but house prices have risen significantly since then. I know of at least 5 other London 'expats' who have moved here in the last 6 months.

Neither of us are from London, so although we loved living in East Dulwich, we didn't have that same ties that others do. We have made loads of friends and are so pleased we made the move.

Pros - We chose a town and in particular a house within walking distance of the town centre so that the kids can have some independence when the time comes. It also means we can walk to and from the bars and restaurants of which there are many. Loads of amazing parks and the beautiful river bank. There is a thriving arts scene of which Bedfringe - an Edinburgh fringe spin off - is the highlight.

Cons - While the state primaries are excellent, three outstanding in our catchment area - one of the secondaries has a bit of catching up to do. We are a long way off this stage, so hoping things will improve. There are several excellent private schools though.

One thing to bear in mind is that even if you have a reduced mortgage, if you are commuting, particularly from outside of London, your travel costs will more than likely cancel this out. My rail ticket is ?400 a month, my husbands is ?500 (he needs the tube as well).

[StraferJack]

"One thing to bear in mind is that even if you have a reduced mortgage, if you are commuting, particularly from outside of London, your travel costs will more than likely cancel this out. My rail ticket is ?400 a month, my husbands is ?500 (he needs the tube as well)."

Horrifying but worth noting that an annual season ticket allows 1/3rd discount for family members as well on individual rail trips which alleviates it some small bit

[midivydale]

We are having these discussions in our home too. Tough one. I would love a house and a garden for ds and to achieve that we would have to move. But i love the area, we are two commuters with a 10 min train journey to work (from Brockley) and live opposite Ivydale school and i have made so many mum friends I would hate to leave.

My main hesitation for leaving is lack of diveristy and fear of racisim/ discrimination.

[neilly1973]

We moved... But only to crofton park! Same house.in ED would be ?250k more... And prob a bit smaller with less garden... Schools are also better and many others moving... No brainier to get in quick before it gets equally expensive...

[pebbles]

I agree that I find the norm is that people who were kids in London stay in London and if bought up in the country a lot of people feel the urge to have more space.

I was brought up in Dulwich and am lucky to have my family still here and pretty much all my school friends are no more than 20 mins drive away. Therefore to me the thought of leaving Dulwich is just a no go area. My husband was brought up in Northamptonshire and came to London for work. However his hours are long and he would never see the kids or me if we lived out of London so luckily (for me) it's a no brainer staying around.

I LOVE visiting friends who have made the move out and do get jealous of their space and relative freedom for their kids.

prm - you asked about teenagers living in London. I'm 36 so safety has changed a lot. I was allowed to walk home from the pub or train station up until 11pm at night whereas I can't see that I will allow my children to walk alone as soon as it gets dark. I loved the fact I could walk to the pub and meet up with my school friends at the weekend. The fact that Central London is only 15 mins away for shopping, theatre, big cinemas, meeting up in Hyde Park to snog boys!!!! - it's wonderful having it all on your door step. BUT staying with friends the other day in the country the doorbell rang at 7pm and a 8 yr old boy was there asking if my nephew wanted to "play football" and off they went to the Green in front of all the houses. No parents were on watch but all the houses were in view. This just can't really happen in London!!!

So..... I'm waffling as usual. My personal opinion stay stay stay :)

[Ann]

I agree with pebbles prn. The transport links are good for teenagers as well as commuters. There was very little to do in the town I grew up which was a 'nice' area, good schools and commuting distance to London, although it's probably much improved now.

Yes you about safety but busy London streets can be safer that quiet country roads too, that's a whole other thread!