Fundraiser for local business owner - Akif Mushtaq - tragically killed by dangerous dog (please share with friends and neighbours in the area)

[Jellybeanz]

13 hours ago, sweetgirl said:

As great as this post is, have you guys thought the family do to want to draw attention to themselves, for reasons you may not understand!

the family have already said they want no money,  not everyone needs money at times like this

instead of just sending your wishes to them personally you have brought media attention they do not need or want!

Sometimes you need to read between the lines!

the court case alone will bring about information the family do not want anyone to know about!

people need to leave this alone now!

you don’t see the family running to the media to give their story……. Think about it

This was done in good faith I can assure you. The money will go to his wife and children. No more media attention, just respect for a well liked member of the East Dulwich business community. Regardless of circumstances, his family are grieving and this is a simple gesture towards them of kindness. No negative posts needed, just starts a conversation about something other than those grieving when nobody on this thread is talking about anything other than the loss of a well liked man, husband, father and brother.

13 hours ago, sweetgirl said:

As great as this post is, have you guys thought the family do to want to draw attention to themselves, for reasons you may not understand!

the family have already said they want no money,  not everyone needs money at times like this

instead of just sending your wishes to them personally you have brought media attention they do not need or want!

Sometimes you need to read between the lines!

the court case alone will bring about information the family do not want anyone to know about!

people need to leave this alone now!

you don’t see the family running to the media to give their story……. Think about it

This was already in the media sadly, regardless of this fundraiser. So at least this detracts from the act itself and court case, which will inevitably again attract media attention. I agree not all media attention is good but this is simply an act of kindness by people who didn't wish to buy the family a million bunches of flowers or plants...

[sweetgirl]

1 hour ago, Jellybeanz said:

This was done in good faith I can assure you. The money will go to his wife and children. No more media attention, just respect for a well liked member of the East Dulwich business community. Regardless of circumstances, his family are grieving and this is a simple gesture towards them of kindness. No negative posts needed, just starts a conversation about something other than those grieving when nobody on this thread is talking about anything other than the loss of a well liked man, husband, father and brother.

This was already in the media sadly, regardless of this fundraiser. So at least this detracts from the act itself and court case, which will inevitably again attract media attention. I agree not all media attention is good but this is simply an act of kindness by people who didn't wish to buy the family a million bunches of flowers or plants...

At no point did I state it wasn’t done in good faith.

It was clearly stated the family asked for nothing more than prayers.

the family are doing nothing more than getting on with things.

we all deal with situations differently 

again I will say, read between the Iines!

 

 

[Jellybeanz]

I understand what you're saying, I didn't know they had asked for nothing but prayers.. anyway hopefully they'll accept it in the kind spirit it was intended if only as savings for his children or something similar as a memory as they grow, that their dad's customers saw him as a friend...

[CPR Dave]

 

Quote

the court case alone will bring about information the family do not want anyone to know about!

 

What does this mean? I think you should explain if people are donating money.

[alice]

It’s an unpleasant comment that is clearly having the desired effect but  please ignore. 

[Sue]

2 hours ago, CPR Dave said:

 

 

What does this mean? I think you should explain if people are donating money.

She presumably cannot explain because the explanation would of necessity reveal information which apparently the family do not want publicised  at this point.

That's my understanding, anyway.

21 minutes ago, alice said:

It’s an unpleasant comment that is clearly having the desired effect but  please ignore. 

What do you mean by this?

[sweetgirl]

2 hours ago, alice said:

It’s an unpleasant comment that is clearly having the desired effect but  please ignore. 

There is nothing unpleasant about the comment.

its how you have construed it!

4 hours ago, CPR Dave said:

 

 

What does this mean? I think you should explain if people are donating money.

We have to remember people are of all different faiths & religions 

what is acceptable for some, may not be for others.

there is no other meaning behind what I am saying.

sometimes things just need to be left alone…….

I understand the fundraiser is with good intentions 

2 hours ago, Sue said:

She presumably cannot explain because the explanation would of necessity reveal information which apparently the family do not want publicised  at this point.

That's my understanding, anyway.

What do you mean by this?

Thank you sue

[Jellybeanz]

Sweet girl and I have messaged and honestly neither one of us has anything but good intentions towards the family at their time of loss.

The family may do what they wish with the money and if they decide not to keep it for his children, perhaps they might have a bench inscribed in Akif's memory, or make a charitable donation. Whatever they choose is honestly for them.

Please no more comments about anything other than the fundraiser, it wasn't sweet girl's intention or mine to start a conversation about circumstances or idle gossip. 

This was a completely horrific tragedy, nothing more, and there is nothing more people need to know if they wish to donate, as this will go to his close family (wife and children) for them to decide how it may help in this time of grief and loss.

Thanks again for everyone's generosity.  

[Jellybeanz]

Thanks for the private messages of support. It is clear that everyone has the family's best interests at heart, especially his wife and children... happy new, may it bring peace.

[Nigello]

If a family at a time of great grief says “please, no donations” and others - well meaning individuals, no doubt - go against that, I consider that to be antagonising behaviour. Just do as they ask and, if you are inclined, make a donation to a charity of your choice. 

[Jellybeanz]

The family may of course donate to a charity of their choice. The fundraiser will remain open, there is no way of closing it early and it was started before I was made aware the family had said they only wanted prayers... I know them fairly well so am hoping they accept the funds for Akif's children in good faith. They can always put savings aside and I'm hopeful the children will learn how well liked Akif was locally. Thanks and please let's avoid further comment. We will never agree, so please donate or don't donate as you wish 🙏 thanks

[Jellybeanz]

Thank you for your generosity, very much appreciated. Donations still coming in... as per post above the money will go to the family to decide whether the children keep it or do something in Akif's name, like a memorial bench or charitable donation.

[Jellybeanz]

I have today spoken to one of his brothers and told him about the collection... he was as I'd hoped very touched, so just wanted to post to say this is actually fine with his family. I am relieved.

[Jellybeanz]

Target now increased as original target met. Thanks for continuing generosity. The family are keen to do something charitable in his name.

[Jellybeanz]

Morning all - I hadn't realised that so many people had commented with their generous donations. If you would like to see them click here (I may put them in a card for the family as they are lovely): https://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/p/akif-mushtaq-rip---fundraising-for-his-family/comments#start

Main fundraiser will remain open until 17th January: https://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/p/akif-mushtaq-rip---fundraising-for-his-family

Thanks for your continuing support and PMs, very much appreciated.

Please remember to make a comment (when donating) if you would like me to transfer to the card to the family, thanks

Edited Monday at 08:59 by Jellybeanz
amending date

[Jellybeanz]

Ending in just under a week. Thanks for everyone's support.  Amazing community 

[Jellybeanz]

Thanks again everyone for messages of support. I've done an electronic card with messages left with donations. 

Heartwarming to see community come together for a grieving family. 

[Azalea]

21 hours ago, Jellybeanz said:

Thanks again everyone for messages of support. I've done an electronic card with messages left with donations. 

Heartwarming to see community come together for a grieving family. 

Yes, it’s very heartwarming.  Very thoughtful of you to set this up.

[Jellybeanz]

3 hours ago, Azalea said:

Yes, it’s very heartwarming.  Very thoughtful of you to set this up.

❤️ 

[Jellybeanz]

£1,155 now raised. Would be great to get to £1,500 by 17th January when the Crowdfunder will close.

His family and friends are hoping to do something for charity in his name...