Overheard...

[hellosailor]

Just saw that a friend of my brother's has posted this on facebook this afternoon..

'Loath as I am to start a story with "In my local farm shop"...

In my local farm shop, a man is giving a cookery lesson to some primary school kids. He says "does everyone like houmous?"

Amid general murmurs of agreement, one kid shouts "I'm kind of over houmous."

Yep, I'm back in East Dulwich.'

It made me laugh and much as I'm kind of loathe to start a 'Kid's say the funniest things!' style thread, it reminded me of a couple of other things that cracked me up when I heard them recently.

Firstly my friend was at Latitude last year and heard a dad reprimanding his small daughter with the words 'NO Jocasta, that's DADDY's Yakult!'

Secondly my friend was the company manager on OLiver Twist in the west end for a long time, she was in the rehearsal room while the director put some newly cast workhouse boys through their paces when there was a cast change. After an initial rehearsal where they were briefing the boys about where to stand, what to do, whether to exit stage left or right, a few rounds of 'Food Glorious Food' etc, the director asked the assembled boys 'Has anyone got any questions?'

And one little lad piped up 'Yes. What did they do if they were lactose intolerant in the workhouse?'

too good.

[number 2]

Mwhahaha!! Love it!

[oimissus]

I was at a 5th birthday party for a friend's daughter and lots of little girls from her private primary school were there. There was an animal handler there, and she started on hedgehogs. 'What shape does a hedgehog go into if it's scared?' she asks. Up go the hands, and one little girl says confidently 'a sphere'. 'That's private education for you' says one mum rather drily. The animal handler did said she'd never had someone give that as the answer before!

[Mrs TP]

At the risk of being kicked off the forum for mentioning the Maccie D word, we were discussing the content of Happy Meals when my 4yr old piped up 'what do you get in a sad meal?'

[oimissus]

Burger King

[buggie]

When I worked in A&E I had the brother of a patient recognise me and tell me that I'd seen him when he'd cut his finger, but it was going on holiday to Sardinia that had made it better!

[ad2000]

Overheard in West End of Glasgow - Child to Waitress when asked what they wanted for lunch.

"I wish to devour the unborn"

Confused look from waitress.

Mother of child "Eggs. He means eggs..."

[simonethebeaver]

Ha! The kids in question were from Eliot Bank, so the pretentiousness has spread to Sydenham.

[yeknomyeknom]

My friends kid insists on wearing goggles to eat her toast in the mornings. She insists she once got a crumb in her eye and doesn't want to risk going blind.

In the supermarket I heard a dad trying to convince his kids that Tom and Jerry weren't a big mouse and a small mouse.

[susyp]

In a cafe near me one weekend i sat through a discussion a mother was having with her 2 6/8 year olds about whether they would prefer to go on a driving holiday through america or fly to the italian lakes. I kind of got the impression they would have preferred a bucket and spade holiday in the UK!

susypx