what time does your 2 yr old get to bed

[lucyA1308]

My 2yr 2 month old has always been good at going to bed. 7.00-7.30pm, after a bedtime story, and a beaker of milk, up to bed, lights out and straight to sleep. Other mums and family have all been very impressed.

Just this week though, things have become much more difficult and she has been getting to sleep between 8.30 and 9.00pm. There are several issues, and I am not sure which one is the underlying factor.

i.) the evenings are a lot lighter, so her usual bed time, it is still very light.

ii.) due to our second child moving out of our room, and into the cot bed, we bought our 2 yr old a "big girls bed", as an investment, instead of another cot bed. She can now get right out of this (even in her sleeping bag), and time after timemake her way back down stairs, until she is completely work out. This is only recently though, and didn't happen before, so I don't think that the new bed is the only issue.

iii.) I am wondering whether to reduce / stop her nap times, if she isn't actually getting sleepy until much later - where as before, when she went to bed, she would be very much ready for sleep.

Is anyone else finding that the longer evenings are becoming an issue yet?

Eventually the 2 girls will share a room, and up until this week, they have had the same bed time - putting the baby down first, and then giving the 2 yr old an extra story time, cuddle of her own, and then straight to bed.

Now, if she can't hold my hand as she is trying to get to sleep (which this evening, took 1 1/2 hours) then she will get out of bed each time.

I am being strict at the moment, because I don't want this to become a habbit, but at the same time, if bed times are a battle of wills every night, she will never want to go to bed. i can't wait by her bed every night, and especially not if they are sharing a room, other wise the baby will wonder why her big sister is getting special treatment, and not her.

I do bed times on my own, because my husband works late, so I feel that I have to be firm, in order to make it work long term.

[dulwichgirl2]

Yes the lighter evenings are an issue for us too. We had the same problem with older girls and do pre-empted it this time by exhausting the little one during the day so that she had to crash out at her usual time. This has completely wiped me out too, though. :-(

[sunbob]

We stopped our daughters nap at about that age. I would listen to her on the monitor and she was spending a higher and higher proportion of her nap time awake. Also, she was not wanting to have a nap- after cutting out the nap I realised that previously she had been very eager to be constantly doing stuff, whereas when she knew she wasn't going to be packed off to bed she was much more willing to relax at home for a little while each day (so not all my down time was lost). On nursery days when she had a nap she wouldn't go to sleep till later either.

[echo]

On a practical note, Can you put in Black out blinds?

I have similar issues including late working partner. My two girls- 3 3/4 and 1 3/4 they tend to have 'flexible' bed times between 7.30 to 9.30 ish on a bad night! My mother thinks I'm crazy. She was a lot 'firmer' with bed times in her day!

I often have to hold the eldest's hand, look for monsters, get a glass of milk etc? The little one is still co-sleeping in the big bed, the eldest always wants to sleep there too.

Anyone writing about this tends to suggest a routine, for example bath, story then bed?

I have often wondered whether girls need less sleep? My brothers two young sons have longs nap and still go to bed at 7.30 on the dot? (teacher mum) But then they are up at 6.30 am? Mine sleep longer in the mornings.

I tend to think they will grow out of it and they are still little, so when school starts..... it will all change.....

[Saila]

I really doubt sleep has anything to do with gender.

I would guess more to do with how active the child has been, whether they've eaten the right foods and a consistent bed time routine - rather than girl v boy.

p.s. another vote for blackout blinds - works wonders in our house

[Pickle]

At 2 both of my kids were going to bed at 7pm (and they still do now, at 4 and 5). My son continued to have a lunchtime nap until he was 4, daughter dropped hers at around 2.5. Personally I would stay firm, get some good blackout blinds and maybe cut down the nap a little. Plenty of fresh air in the afternoon and a strong wind down routine before bed.

Good luck

[esme]

My son is also staying up later, tho I find after a second burst of energy (usually a puzzle and story then more milk) he settles... I think they all go through stages, regardless of light nights, sometimes growth spurts or something else, but usually go back to their routines sooner or later. I would also try some food an hour or so before bedtime to make sure it's not hunger (from growth spurt or just generally doing more now the days are sunnier - well except for this week haha) :)

[nylonmeals]

@LucyA1308, how old is your baby? Maybe the wanting to go to bed later is a reaction to that and a way of demonstrating to you that she is the older one? I know that our 2 year old went through/is going thru that.

[ClaireClaire]

Just to add my 2 cents... :-)

My kids (now aged 2.5 and 5.5) go down around 8.30pm and have done so for ages. (At least a year)

There is no way in h*ll I would be able to get them to sleep at 7pm!

We do all the usual good things and they go down well around 8.30pm

Both my kids dropped their midday nap by the age of 2.

I hope you can get your early bedtimes back on track, LucyA1308.... I guess this is just to say there might be a chance that your kids are like mine, and just need less sleep!!

Good luck with it

Claire x

[Saffron]

My daughter (27 mo) goes to bed at 9:30! Some children really do need less sleep than others, but if you had a routine that was working then it's probably worth having a crack at it again, perhaps with some small variations. Maybe a combination of reducing naptime and moving the bedtime back 1/2h? Some children start to need less sleep as they transition from toddler to child.

I do bedtimes on my own too, so I feel your pain!

[natalieljackson]

We had a similar hard time with our daughter's bedtime not long after she went into a 'big girl's bed', and also not long after her little brother had arrived! She must have been around 3, and started to get up when she'd never done it before, or shout out and wake the baby constantly.

In the end, something really simple worked, we told her if she stayed in bed quietly we would go back and check on her after 2 minutes. If she kept calling out/ coming down there would be no tv (or now, chocolate milk)the next day.

We would go in, give her a kiss, or just say, "Good girl,night night."

After a couple of nights of this working we went in after 3 minutes, then 4.

She is 5 now and she still says "Come and check on me in 4 minutes!" as we put her to bed, but in reality it's usually 15 minutes, or we forget until we go to bed.

She's usually asleep after 1 check.

I think she just felt insecure and if she knows we're around and will check on her she's not worried.

Hope this helps, it's so hard to work out what they need, and they're all so different, but it might be worth a try?

Good luck,

Natalie

[lucyA1308]

Hi Natalie.

Your post sounds very familiar. I will try your tip, and am also going to think about a sticker chart with a reward at the end of the week if her sleep time improves. Thank you.

Her favourite phrase at the moment is "everyone's awake now"!

[natalieljackson]

Hope it works, I'm certainly no expert. My 2 year old son was awake at 4.30 this morning and didn't get back to sleep until 6am. The alarm clock goes off at 6.20.

Every time we think we've cracked the sleep thing somehing changes!

Let me know how you get on,

xxx

[Sanne Panne]

What worked for us is to stick to the same bedtime but not expect that the little one goes straight to sleep (and communicate that to her). E.g. leave a little light on and say it's fine to look at books and play with toys a bit longer and get into bed when tired but stay in the room and not make lots of noise... (and be firm about her staying in the room). When they're this small they may sometimes fall asleep on the floor so it's a good idea to check after a couple of hours ;)

Of course, limiting nap time a bit and using black out blinds could help too although the benefit of the blinds was mostly to keep the kids from waking too early in the morning as we leave a light on at bedtime anyway.

Good luck, every child and every situation is unique.