Sensing movement

[louloub27]

Hi there

Can anyone offer any advice? Our 16-month old has previously been a great sleeper but just recently has been waking about an hour or so after we put her down in the evening and screaming madly until we go in to her. We have been settling her by shushing and patting her in the cot and when she seems to be fast asleep we make for the door but the moment we get there (very quietly) she senses we have gone and immediately starts screaming and jumps up again.

It sounds comical now I have written it down but it is so tiring as it sometimes goes on for a whole evening and into the early hours. It seems to be enough for her to be able to see us or feel our presence in the room so my husband has taken to sleeping on an air bed next to her cot. She is not in pain or teething.

Controlled crying has not worked, different lights and lullaby toys do not seem not to be working, toys in the cot are not working. Does anyone have any experience of this? Is it just a phase?

Many thanks in advance.

[jollybaby]

Louloub27 I was about to write a very similar post. Miss Jb is 15 months and over the past three weeks has been doing this 3 nights out of 4. It's usually a bit later ie 1-3 in the morning but it can take well over an hour to settle her. If you pick her up she arches her back and kicks to get away so we end up sitting by the cot and rubbing her back until she's in a really deep sleep and then try to tip toe away. A few times we' e had to resort tongiving her milk which is a habit I don't want to get into but it's hard when you've got a full day at work looming and you 've been up for an hour and a half.

My brief google has brought up over tiredness and night terrors as a cause (not sure about the latter) but whatever the cause I'm praying it 's a phase as it's getting quite wearing. Hoping for lots of reassuring and helpful posts!!

[louloub27]

Jollybaby, i was also wondering about separation anxiety?? i will google it later.

The thing that i find unusual is that she can be wide awake in an instant and will scream hysterically whilst we are not there, but the absolute second we get in the room, she stops.

controlled crying worked well with our 3-year old when she was a baby, but this time, our 16-month old doesn't get it all. she doesn't give up screaming to sleep!

good luck with baby JB. let's see if anyone else can offer some much needed advice :o)

[Coach Beth]

A technique that I read about that worked well for me when my son was this age was to gradually each night (or every severAl nights depending on the stage)move further and further away. So we woukd start out patting and shushing beside the cot, then shushing sitting near cot, then sitting further away, then out the door with door open, then in the hall with door open.

Good luck!

[Audrey]

Hi,

Just wondered how this worked out for those who were suffering, and if you came to any conclusions as to the cause?

14 mo has been screaming each night since Thursday at bedtime (exactly as the OP describes), has a few random early wakings (between 4 and 6) and last night between 3.30 and 5.30. She was previously a really good 7-7 sleeper, going down with minimal fuss.

Personally I think it's chronic overtiredness. She only naps for an hour or so a day and is super active when awake. This is really since she started full time nursery 6 weeks ago. I'm ruling out separation anxiety as she is now very happy there with no signs of stress at drop off or collection.

She is noticably tired and I've asked them to try harder to encourage either 2 naps or 1 longer one (most feasible option at this stage I think) but if this is going to continue we are going to have to have crises talks!

Just wondered what other people's experience were and thoughts with the benefit of hindsight before I go in so I can have a discussion with them and something to back up my suspicions.

Sorry for long post, TIA.

[Yak]

Hi Audrey,

In my totally unqualified opinion that does sound like it could be overtiredness. My son would do 7 - 7 no probs, plus at least 3 hours of napping every day. But at nursery he only does an hour a day (after lunch, whereas at the weekends he will do a morning and pm nap). In our case he's just so happy and busy there he really doesn't want to miss out on anything and so is the last to fall asleep. It caused me no end of stress in the early days and his keyworker and I had endless discussions and strategies about what we were going to do (including trying for mid morning longer nap, shush patting him after an hours nap, separate rooms, putting him in a cot rather than a mat on the floor, muslin cloths from home for comfort etc) but in the end we both just came to the conclusion that we would just have to let him be.

One tip - a super early bedtime sometimes helps reset our little one. We also brought bedtime forward to about 6.30. He comes home at 5.30 and on occasions I've put him to bed by 6....sounds mad but the first time we did this we had to go and wake him up at 7.30 the next morning!

Hope things get better for you soon.

[Audrey]

Thanks Yak - sounds v familiar. She hates to think anything is happening without her (her Granny doesn't know WHERE she gets it from...). Sometimes I think the nursery staff look more stressed than me!

I like the early bed suggestion, as I also think that her daddy gets a bit overexcited when he gets her home and they get a bit exuberant together, to put it mildly. A stop to this is going to go down like a lead balloon as he doesn't even agree that its over tiredness. Anyway he is away next week so I can trial away to my hearts content (and tell him what I like quite frankly!).

Thanks again & hope all the Yak-ers are well!