Idle cricket musing

[Brendan]

Well that?s yours and Tony?s business. ;-)

He?s ?stralian now anyway.

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

Call that sledging, Brendan? You couldn't find a bob team on a lazy luge.

[david_carnell]

Q. What do Mark Boucher and Michael Jackson have in common?

A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason.

[Ted Max]

Graeme Smith likes a nice hard wicket, that's why he bought himself this new roller.

[Brendan]

Was that innuendo or a joke about iconic British motorcar manufacturers that have to be administered by German companies in order to turn a profit?

[Ted Max]

Neither. I was pointing out, with no little pictorial elegance and relevance, that Graeme Smith has a very large chin.

[Brendan]

There you go making with the innuendo again. I know your cricket is bordering on comedy but do you poms have to turn everything into an Carry On film.

Sid James was also South African incidentally.

[Ted Max]

It's very educational being here. I didn't know that South Africans called people English people poms.

(not that I am English).

[Brendan]

Always did where I came from.

Anyway I don't know why you brought up Sid James he wasn't as talented as Graeme Smith in the chin department which may or may not have helped when playing an Englishman. But that is neither here nor there. Although incidentaly Sid James died after collapsing on stage in Sunderland which is where Lewis Carroll was from. Lewis Carroll did not play cricket and wasn?t South African but he did have a chin albeit a rather unremarkable one. And I now cannot mention him without getting that dammed Jamelia song stuck in my head but that probably makes less sense to me than it does to you. Sid James now haunts the Sunderland Empire and another South African is playing the lead role in the first instalment of Ingerland?s summer of Carry On Cricket starting next week with Carry On Up The MCC. Staring Kevin Peitersen as the plucky cockney with the Broad, Sidebottom sisters supporting.

[Brendan]

Ted Max Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> (not that I am English).

Ahhh. It?s not as much fun slaggin off the English Cricket team to someone who isn?t English.

[Ted Max]

I do support them, though. So please slag away, I'm enjoying it (so must be a bit English, then).

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

Behind you, Brendan

[Brendan]

eek!

She's behind you.

Carry On, pantomime, both good metaphors.

The only fours we'll be seeing from the cast I should think.

[Ted Max]

Morning Brendan, morning everyone. Think we'll get away on time this morning?

[david_carnell]

Weather looks decent.

Bring 'em on!

[Brendan]

Morning all.

Well the weather seems to be holding for now with the match due to start in 15 minutes. England are on a winning streak but South Africa haven?t lost a test match on this ground since they stopped being a bunch of dirty racists and were let back into international cricket.

South Africa are clear favourites with Smith, Kallis, Pietersen, Prince and Strauss all likely to get runs in this series. Their bowling is also strong although perhaps insane with the village idiot as first change:

http://images.tvnz.co.nz/tvnz_images/sport/cricket_world_cup/Photogallery/Photogallery4/andre_nel_tongue_gal.jpg

Using a similar tactic England has sought the help of a bearded lady.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/nottingham/content/images/2007/07/31/cricket_01_353x470.jpg

[Brendan]

And SA are having a bowl. Good positive move, trying to exploit the still moist conditions. As Kallis and Steyn both swing both ways they should enjoy this.

[david_carnell]

Except the rain has turned the pitch into plasticine and the feared pacemen of the Safas have turned into something as docile as a petting zoo.

[Keef]

Nice steady start, good to see.

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

Indeed.

Only grating thing is Mr Boycott's voice.

[mockney piers]

A pal phoned at 8:5 this morning asking if I'd like to join him at the test. Unfortunately I'd made it to the office at 8:32 :(

Though hardly electric out there so far, I can guarantee you where I'd rather be right now.

[Brendan]

I think it is now time for the South Africans to gain a psychological advantage by moaning about the fucking English weather.

[david_carnell]

Steyn, the best pace bowler in the world?

>:D<

He just got clattered for nine off the last over.

[Brendan]

Listen here, the spin of the earth is quicker further away from the equator. It affects the trajectory of the ball.

Just you wait until he gets used to it.

[Ted Max]

Guardian OBO.

"Listen, if you have already had a bacon sandwich for breakfast and are planning to have pizza for dinner, when exactly are you supposed to fit your curry in except at lunchtime?" Indeed, Brendan van R*****, indeed.

Anyone we know, emailing the O-B-O?