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Poor you Max, what a rough deal you've had. PGC expressed my feelings too, its not about condoning but appreciating that some of the lucky ones can get through that shit experience and become a whole, decent person. Really sorry and understand why you were quick to jump (I certainly would have been too).
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Maximay I'm also really sorry to hear that you lost your son. Nothing can ever take away that pain and I couldn't begin to imagine what it must be like for you. You're very brave being able to talk about it here. I lost a close friend and a family member to Heroin OD's and to be frank if it wasn't Heroin they would've taken their lives in another way because of the problems they had and how they became detached and saw their own plight. I hope that over time things get better and that you will find some positives like the beautiful grandchildren he gave you.
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As I said earlier when things were getting heated Maximay. I can?t possibly imagine what things are like for your perspective and I apologise for being insensitive towards that.


This forum is not so bad. Lots of the people on here do know each other but they are not clicky. As an outsider to both East Dulwich and England I have found them very welcoming indeed. Even though I disagree with lots of them quite often.

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Edward Everett once told a man who had been slandered: "Half the people who buy that paper never saw the article about you. Half the people who did see it failed to read it. Half of those who read it failed to understand it. Half of those who understood it knew you and refused to believe it. Half of those who believed it were people of no consequence anyway."


Vero

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Maximay - one of the things that drives me is seeing the total waste of lives to drugs. The lives ruined from taking drugs, and the lives ruined from the violence surrounding selling it.


The knee jerk reactions of politicians are not working and we need a real debate on how to change this around.


I have tried my best on a personal level with lots of people I know who are addicted to drugs, to help them understand that there can be life after drug addiction, if you don't leave it too late.


I had to do something positive with the things I have experienced, because the pain that I put my kids through, and the pain I felt, has to be used for some good. It can't just be for nothing.


I see corruption and money being given higher priority than people, and it makes me angry and sad. I see the links between the greed at the top and the lack of care and humanity at the bottom.


We have no choice but to change things. I can't not fight.


I want things to be better cos most people have good in them and things can be different. If I thought there was no chance of changing things, I'd have no hope left, and I can't have no hope.

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I think that you chav like both feet in the gutter. Not because of being a smack head, or being sent down as a courier of bags of brown. Prostitution seems like an honourable profession compared to your next move for I have known a number of delightful professionals whom I considered good and trustworthy souls. The thought of becoming part of the judiciary though sends shivers, as I cannot remember coming across or using the services of either a solicitor or barrister that I have paid that I could honestly trust.

Slithering down to the lowest point, lower than a loose ankle band on a flat footed well-digger, in to politics. I consider that politicians are lawyers with Oscars they arranged the theft of the common land and if they can do that and call it legal then there is nothing I can think of, that they won't stoop to.

If you get elected which I hope you do, as it will give us a chance to deal with a straight and open politician, who is not connected with old school ties, or masonic influences, just those two credentials would get you my vote. I suspect though that if you were to get elected your enemies, (all the opposition) would run your personal history through the nationals and on to the small screen to curb any future success. I admire your courage wish you well in your chosen career.

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I know a fair few people who have dealt in order to fund their university and post graduate studies and have gone on to some pretty impressive positions. And not all dealers "push" drugs.Also an awful lot of dealers don't go near class A drugs at all.


But any politician or would be politician that brings up religion instantly guarantees zero votes for me.


Invisible friends are only for kids with no friends, not adults with any common sense.

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The religious thing was not something I really went into in the interview but clich?s are often clich?s because they happen a lot.


One thing that happens when you come off of drugs, is that all the emotions and things you have done, come flooding back in glorious technicolour. I refused the smarties the prison psychiatrist wanted to shove down my throat and made myself face it all full-on, because I did not want to just bury it all with more drugs.


In order to move on you have to face your demons. You have a lot of time to think and read in prison, especially in a prison where you don't speak the language. You can start to understand how you got to the place you got, but the guilt doesn't go away that easily.


For me at a time when I wanted to die rather than carry on with the emotional pain that felt like molten lead inside my body, I was given a lifeline. The nuns and missionaries who work with prisoners are devoted and inspiring people, and whether you believe in God or not, they help turn people around.


This is not about feeling sorry for people or thinking they are suddenly pious. It's about practical ways of making an impact upon something that most people think is a problem in modern western society.


It works.


I talk to anyone who is going down a personal or socially destructive path whether it seems like I'm wasting my breath or not, because at some time, some of the people I talk to will be ready to listen to the message of hope and might change their life in a small way. It is like planting seeds. Sometimes it takes a long time for them to sprout, some push up quickly and wither and some grow up strong. I never see relapses as failure, because where there is still breath in someone's body they can get back up again. Many people take 2 steps forward and 1 back, or even go back to where they started, but you need to help people realise they need to analyse why they fell down and forgive themselves for it.


Guilt plays a very negative part in the addiction cycle. It is an emotion that can bring someone back to their knees again and again, so for me becoming a Christian and allowing myself to let go of the guilt was a major part in my recovery.


I don't bring religion into it but before I even opened a bible, I'd already come to the same conclusions about human happiness myself, through analysing the way I was living (and others around me) in a way that brought unhappiness. Simple as that really.


This society is about quick gratification at the expense of long term happiness. Most of us are cut off from nature and live unnatural lives based on working to buy the products and services of others because we don't have the time to do it ourselves or time to learn the skills to do it ourselves.


This is deeply unsatisfying for many people and results in many people trying to fill the hole inside them with, drugs, alcohol, sex, food, shopping, gambling etc but if you step back and realise that it's the people around you and your community that are important, not the material stuff we surround ourselves with, it helps you to gain some perspective and move towards filling that hole with non-destructive behaviour.

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My deepest sympathy to the chap who lost his son to heroin abuse - it must be a terrible experience to lose a child to something so wasteful and pointless. And you are still living with the consequences of this, awful. I hope the situation with the threats resolves itself soon - for the sake of your grandchildren and the family.


But jesus I am so surprised by some of the views here - this is a forum that gets itself in rebellion over chain coffee shops, overpriced babyclothes shops, estate agents and carbon foot print issues, but drug abuse and smuggling nahhhhh thats ok. Eh??? One of my big bug bears is middle class attitudes to "recreational" drug use. Well unless drugs are now being sold in John Lewis, organically farmed in sussex by a nice farmer called John, then where do we really think our money goes when we purchase drugs. The drug industry, and it is a huge industry, is happy to sell dirt cheap heroin to kids who have to sell themselves to pay for it. Middlesborough has the highest instances of under age prostitution in the country and guess what, the majority are on heroin or crack. More often than not prices are supplemented by the people willing to pay more for it - ooh all those nice people with a bit of charlie after the carbon neutral organic dinner party. Ok some dealer dont push class a but where do you think they buy their stuff from??? Not John Lewis. I dont know how anyone with a social concience can contribute to the demand for this industry - the money all flows to a small number of sources, and these people arent all that nice.

and as for amanda - no I wouldnt vote for her, and I dont admire her honesty, in the way I dont admire anyone who admits to a horrible crime - are we so used to politicians lying to us we some how think the ones who are honest about their misdemeanours are some how better. And the sympathy of "what she has been through" - it was self inflicted - there was a choice somewhere along the line. Still you may make an ok politician - some of the last posts have a touching level of spin....


well thats me not able to attend any forum drinks.......

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Dita - there is no need for you to accept what I did, I am not asking for or expecting that, but isn't it better that I use my knowledge of the underbelly of our society to try to achieve something positive, even if just as recompense for what I have done?


Another point I would like to make, is that this is supposed to be a representative democracy. We have a glut of middle class politicians allegedly representing the middle class (although in reality they seem to be representing the big business class) but where are the representatives of the underclass? Are they not a part of this society? However someone may want to demonize them, they have a legitimate expectation of democratic representation in a representative democracy.

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Maximay, please don't think of this forum as horrid and cliquey. I can see why you'd have felt that, but there was never an intention to bully you, and I was trying to say that you ere perfectly entitled to an opinion.


Sorry about your son, and (whilst I know this is easy for me to say), try not to worry too much about the threats from this c**t. One would assume e's not totally stupid, and doing anyhing against you would just be idiotic if he wants to stay out of the eyes of the law.

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Saying that you have been there done that so you must be the best qualified person to advise/counsel other people in relation to it, doesn't really cut it, that would be ok if you were applying to work for a drugs counselling bureau or something like that, you are trying to stand up as the average Joe on the street and represent people of all walks of life and I am sorry to say the majority of members of the public do not have a criminal record, let alone a past as colourful as yours. You can't expect people to look past that because hey now you regret it, of course you regret it, it is (although sometimes should not) now hampering your now chosen way of life, people are offered all sorts of choices and decisions to make in life, and they do not all (though I am not saying you are)use the well I was going through a bad time and because of that I did this, excuse. Many of us have real rough lives and how we deal or chose to deal with that is up to the person in question. I do believe people can redeem themselves though, and are allowed to make mistakes in life, like drugs, if it was only the once, (assuming it was only the once you smuggled drugs into the country and were unlucky enough to get caught your first time) then everyone is entitled to an error in judgement and can redeem themselves.
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Maximay, I'm so very sorry for your loss and quite understand how bewildered, angry and frustrated you must feel at the shattering of your family and the continuing threat to it. Like Keef I doubt whether this man would actually be stupid enough to do anything, but realise that in itself is little comfort.


I too have posted but a few times myself, and as yet have never met with any hostility. Yes, some people seem to get very excited over the strangest things, but as a rule I find the forum very informative and at times quite hilarious!


I don't 'know' anyone here, well I probably chat with a few of you at the school gates or see you about, I may even have sat on the 176 whist you were chucking up, but I couldn't actually put a face to any of the names, with the exception of Chav, but then that was easy because she has a picture on her website. Have now realised that our children go to the same school and I have often seen her riding her bike down with the dog, haven't really talked to her save on the couple of occasions that my son has asked to stroke the dog. From what I've read on here she seems an honest woman, if maybe a little too open at times (squirts!) but that's just my opinion, (the sharing, not the honesty!). I commend Chav for taking her life and turning it around and for her quite obvious passion and dedication for bringing about changes for the good of the community.


If we're all totally honest there is bound to be something in our past or even current life that we would rather wasn't out there for all to see, so let him who is without sin and all that jazz.

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Saw the story this morning - I thought it came over as balanced and positive. Certainly not prurient or damaging to you CWLD, would expect it to win you votes, not lose them. Everyone has a history - no on should be shackled by their history. If I was resident in your constituency you'd get my vote.
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Um, just a point about the 'middle class recreational drug use'. Firstly there is a distinction between 'abuse' and 'use' and second if there was no prohibtion then the money spent would not line the pockets of big crime cartel types. It may line the pockets of government though (poss same thing).

I'm all for recreational drug use as you can probably tell. That doesn't mean I don't think about the exploitation and nastiness that surrounds the industry.

Until governments realise that they cannot dictate which drugs we can and can't take; i.e medical pharmaceuticals ok, recreational pharmaceuticals not ok, the problem of crime surrounding drugs will continue. Should we all stop doing these things because we are told to or should governments listen to the majority of people who are able to use recreational drugs without causing any harm to others.

My view and I know it doesn't sit well with other people's but as has been proven many times prohibition does not work, what is needed is a sensible outlook.

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The problem with Skag isnt the skag - if this makes any sense


pharmeutical skag delivered in regulated measured doses does ( like any other drug - nicotine. caffine etc ) have an addictive side to it - the psycological vs the physical addiction question is an ongoing debate - it is likely that skag is less addcitve than nictine or caffiene


the risk and the dangers with using skag are multifold, but are more to do with infections, disease,theiving , mixing with criminals to get the stuff and suchlike - the OD is a risk, but this is to do with using a non regulated and non standard product with no idea of what is actually in it.


Prohibition has not proved to be nuseful with any product- its just allows the crims to make money and corner a market


I would never advocate regular use of soemthing like this - any addiction isnt good for you, whatever the product


legalisation isnt the same as promotion- just as legalising homosexuality wasnt promoting it.


its a big and as weve seen, highly emotive debate for obvious reasons - but criminalising it would seem to be costing us more - in terms of lives and hard cash


it would be a brave step for a politico to open the debate - and probabaly career suicicide if it wasnt hadled ith extreme caution.

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