Where to have a baby shower in ED..?

[mooncake]

Hello,

My friends are insisting we need to have a baby shower, but I'm thinking it would probably not be a good idea to do this my own diddy little house - especially seeing as we are planning a home birth and I'll be over 37 weeks by then.

Does anyone have any ideas / suggestions of where in East Dulwich might be a good place to go? Possibly one that supplies nibbles or afternoon tea... or perhaps just a nice sized room for c. 15 people and we'll bring our own? Worried it may be a little tricky as things may be getting booked out for Christmas season!

Thanks. :)

[WrightC]

Have you tried All Fried Up on East Dulwich Road (02077326688)? I know it sounds random, however I always see parties in there and not just children parties. They also supply Tea & cakes. My friend holds baby music classes there on a Tuesday morning if you interested for when little one comes along.

[northlondoner]

Adventure Bar.

[Otta]

I'm interested, do lots of women have these?

An American friend was trying to convince Mrs Otta to have one when she was pregnant with our first. I said go for it, if nothing else, for the pressies, but she was having no part of it.

[Pickle]

I dont think it's very common here is it? My sister went to one recently in NZ (not common there either) and said it was fun, although was confused as to whether she would then have to buy another gift when the baby arrived.

In terms of local locations, All Fired Up, Le Chandelier, or maybe one of the pubs with bookable space?

Enjoy!

[Yak]

Mooncake, do I sense from your post you're not entirely up for a baby shower? If you don't really fancy organising a big "do" how about just plonking yourself in a pub / bar for a couple of hours and inviting people to drop by? It's lovely that your friends want to spend time with you at such an exciting time of your life - I'd just say that don't feel pressurised into having a baby shower with all that entails (not entirely sure myself as the very idea personally puts me off, but my mental image is of pink babygros, ballons and lots of cooing and oohing etc) if you don't want to.

Apologies if I've misread your post or read something into it that wasn't there, but thought I'd shove my tuppence in anyway!

[helena handbasket]

It's the norm in North America, at least for your first child. My friends had one for me and it was really lovely. It's such a huge rite of passage, why not celebrate?

I think the British impression is that it's vulgar? but I don't really understand why. Too many movies? The gifts are often practical items, such as a nice stock of baby lotions/creams/blankets etc and generally you invite the people who are good friends and would buy a gift anyway. Sometimes people join together to buy something bigger; I had some ladies from work pool their money for a really lovely wooden stair gate. Usually it's a way to give a few things you found useful with your own. I received things like buggy storage and a mirror for the car, things I would not have thought to buy but were really useful. A good friend who could not breast feed due to a medical condition received loads of formula to help offset the cost. A friend bought us a massive box of nappies, which seemed odd at the time but boy were they ever appreciated once we realized the cost! There can be tea and cake, or whatever, and lots of well wishes and stories. I don't remember any balloons! I think they are as individual as a birthday party really, no hard and fast rules.

There sure are a lot of myths about how things are done in "America", just like the Halloween thread!:))

I asked to have mine after my son was born so that I would get less yellow stuff :) and it was great because all my lady friends got to meet and hold the new baby. Plus it was just nice to have an afternoon of attention after those first weeks of newborn craziness. It's an individual thing I guess, but I can't a negative side to it.

Usually they are held at the hosts house so the knackered mum just has to show up and be a bit spoiled for a few hours, but a cozy pub would be great too.

If you do it, enjoy! You can also have a "no gifts" party where guests just bring advice to be compiled in a special book or something if you feel odd about the gifts.

[Saffron]

helena handbasket Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

>

> There sure are a lot of myths about how things are

> done in "America", just like the Halloween

> thread!:))

>

Yes, that's certainly true! And the US and Canada are such big places, that there can even be different traditions in different areas. Some of my family live in the southern States. The tradiditon there is that a baby shower is not something the mother-to-be organises. It's something that her friends organise for her to celebrate the pregnancy, and it certainly not a vulgar, gauche, or extravagent affair. It's usually just a small group of close friends at someone's house or perhaps a cafe. Gifts are often not for the baby, but for the mother herself, like a nice dressing gown for the labour, maternity clothes, or massage/manicure. (Then a separate gift is given to both parents for the baby when s/he arrives.) Traditionally the baby shower would also be a time when all the blokes are away and the ladies can talk about lady stuff. In particular, women who have given birth previously might have advice about the labour or the first few weeks postpartum.

The Dulwich Woodhouse is a pretty venue and has lots of comfy seating. When last I checked, they didn't charge a function fee, but would still be able to set an area aside for you. If you speak with the manager in advance, they can probably offer you a decent price on drinks and nibbles. xx

[helena handbasket]

Yep all true Saffron.

I think it's such a lovely way to make the leap into the great unknown!

[DrDom]

the alma?

[mooncake]

Thanks for all the suggestions. I think I will have a look into All Fired Up and a couple of the local pubs - everyone will be travelling out from London so needs to be somewhere relatively easy to get to. Do you have to do ceramics painting at AFU or can you just use it as a venue??

I've been to two baby showers before - organised by Americans no less - and felt a bit put off by all the baby games, but I'll just ask my friend who's organising to go easy on that bit! I figure it's a good way of seeing all my friends before baby arrives when it's really difficult to squeeze in lots of individual meetups (and I'm rubbish at turning down invitations!). The majority of my friends don't have babies though so won't be able to do the advice book - they're much more likely to be in the cute-but-slightly-useless-gift-buying camp!

[Otta]

I think the reason my wife wasn't interested wa not because she thought it was vulgar or anything like that, but just because she felt sick and "ft" (HER WORDS!!!), and just didn't want to see a load of people.

Personally, I think it's quite nice to show the mother to be some support.

[etta166]

DON'T go to All Fired Up!! I've been there a couple of times and it has not worked out well... See my other post on the forum. If you're willing to go to Herne Hill, the Florence is great and has a play room for children.

Also, on a practical note, at All Fired Up there are no comfy chairs or anything for the 37+ week pregnant ladies to relax in.

And as for the non-Britishness of baby showers, who cares? If you and your friend want to do it, then I'd say that's a good enough reason. I was going to have one for baby #1, but he inconveniantly showed up early and 2 days before the planned shower. Given that it was a home birth, I guess that we could have deflated the birth pool and gone ahead anyway, but we didn't in the end.

[mooncake]

thanks for the tip... it sounds awful! I did ceramics painting recently in a place in West London which was superb.

I'm trying le chandelier at the moment as think afternoon tea would be great and it looks like a lovely venue, but it depends on whether the few mothers involved are going to want to bring their baby along - they said they don't really have space for prams and don't usually allow little ones in their private room!

Otherwise I think it's going to have to be a pub... I haven't been to many around here though, so appreciate the advice on that. Generally I'd prefer somewhere in ED where it's easy to get to / from my own home and for others to get there by public transport.

[mooncake]

Just thought I should say - we ended up having the baby shower at Le Chandelier yesterday in their Moroccan Room and it was superb.

The staff were fantastic even though we're certainly not the easiest bunch. They were really helpful, allowed us to pre-order a wide variety of food (we had afternoon teas, canapes and a la carte as well) and everything we had was delicious. Everyone left happy and very very full. :)

Thanks Pickle for the recommendation!

[awilliams123]

My sister threw me a baby shower at the Plough...not chic I know, but worked out well beacuse they gave us the entire back bit (right before you go down the stairs to the garden. They supplied the food as well...we ended up having quite a nice afternoon/evening. However, that was last year just after christmas...not sure if it would be just as nice now as I've been in there recently for food and wasn't impressed. Worth look though...they might let you supply your own food.

Congrats by the way!

[awilliams123]

Sorry, jsut read, you've already done it! Glad you had a nice time.