Oh weaning!

[mrs f]

I do understand what you are trying to say here BUT I think you are being a little dramatic. Sitting at your kitchen table & offering your baby food on a spoon is hardly that scary, you are not a stranger, you are their mum & are not hiding anywhere but sat with them.

Don't get me wrong I'm all for BLW, think it's great but, please bear in mind that ED has a high proportion of mothers who are into modern/ hippy/ left wing etc parenting techniques however this does not represent the whole of ED, and certainally not the whole of the uk... I'm sure most people in this country do forms of TW with their babies & some are fussy & some (amazingly) aren't.

SB tried BLW with no 1 & still has a fussy child so clearly it doesn't work for everyone... If BLW isn't for you, that doesnt make you a bad mother or control freak... It's pretty normal in fact.

I have no weaning advice for you SB or Jenny, but I think some people on here are being a little idealistic with their view points. I know you both & think you are both fab mums & don't judge you for trying to get your babies to eat with a spoon.

Fuschia Wrote:

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> Put yourself in the child's plAce

>

> Imagine sitting down in a restaurant in some

> obscure Chinese town with no menu

>

> Everytime you open your mouth to chat about the

> weather a deranged woman leaps out from behind a

> pot plant and tries to shovel some totally

> unfamiliar item into your mouth

>

> When you protest and clamp your mouth shut she

> starts doing some bizarre dance

>

> Just as you are relaxing and begin to laugh, again

> she tries to lob something obscure into your open

> mouth

[cuppa tea]

I didn't think Fuschia was specifically talking about baby led weaning was she? i read it as someone helpfully trying to put across the babies perspective on being fed. Wasn't it done slightly tongue in cheek? Noone is saying anyone is a bad mother, or judging them for feeding their babies purees - now that is dramatic!

Personally, and this goes against current advice, but a 7 month old baby is probably just not that interested in food yet. We are told an arbitrary 6 months for weaning, but neither of mine have shown any interest whatsoever until they were well over a year. They were still breastfed and not even slightly underweight. My first was fed purees and finger food, my second refused to take anything off a spoon. I don't think BLW is the issue....getting frustrated and upset over your children not eating is just not worth it! It's a waste of precious maternal energy.

[snowboarder]

Good to hear all the viewpoints. I know there are lots of advocates for BLW here - one of the reasons I did it last time - it's just I now have a 2.5 yr old who will pretty much only eat pasta - maybe I messed up along the way but I just NEED to have a child who eats more normally this time!! I think I am finding it frustrating as smallest WILL eat yoghurts and fruity stuff and opened his mouth like a baby bird for a plum fromage frais - yum - but not my vegetable efforts. And I see signs of his brother (he also happily chomped on some tomato pasta this evening) and I just want him to be able to eat, say, shepherds pie. So how do I get there if the little monkey won't eat my food?!?

[Fuschia]

Sb, re shepherds pie etc ...

Child no 1 ( weaned at 4m onto purees as was recommended then, but rejected spoon totally from about 6m so ended up on 'finger foods' but due to my fear of mess I avoided sauces and slop ... Won't countenance even pasta sauce, still!

Twins I had same determination as you sb, to endure children ate 'Proper' food

Didn't even start till 6m ...

Cooked and pureed stuff and also did lots of finger foods ... Never gad the patience to spoon feed two though my child minder did. They had home made food whereas child no 1 had ended up only Prepared to try certain (sweetish) jars

Twins never got to try the pouches with apple and veg .. I thought they were ridiculously expensive!

Child no 4

Really really I was in no rush

Offered him sliced veg at about 6m

After about a month had sudden panic worried he wasn't eating much and bought some jars which he rejected in disgust

At 10m he is doing really well

He does eat fish pie and had a go at my aduki bean chilli at the weekend

He feeds himself with his hsnds and baby bjorn spoon

Very very messy!

Obviously some children are less malleable than others, more cautious in Personality

But all mine are pretty strong willed

I thInk my advce, after doing the bloody thIng 4 times would be

Relax

Let them do it all

Give them a loaded spoon or bowl of slop then straight in the bath

Don't stand there trying not to grimace

Smile with enthusiasm as they smear it in their ears

Don't lose confidence and start feeding them pouches of exPensive sweetened glop

Once they know it exists they will fuss to they get it

Offer water to drink

KeeP juice a secret

[Fuschia]

The road isn't a straight line

First month or so it's a novelty

Then they get bored and start to insist on doing it themselves

From about 18m they get fussy until they're about 5 - evolutionary biology says this is a protective mechanism to prevent them getting poisoned once they can wander off alone

[Fuschia]

http://www.parentingscience.com/picky-eater.html

Brilliant article!!

[mrs f]

Um could you try putting apple in with veg then gradually reducing the quantity of apple until it's just veg again?

[jennyh]

Oh im not getting concerned really, I think it is all quite amusing. As always the benefit of hindsight is helpful for all mothers, ones who have been there before and ones who are trying again, albeit slightly differently. I am not standing over her shoving spoons in left, right and centre but I do lightly encourage her to try whats on the spoon because sometimes she actually likes it but her refusal to open means that she doesn't get to taste it. After the initial encouragement she will then go one to take 2 or 3 spoonfuls. I know that nutritionally there is no need for her to have these foods and I do get enjoyment out of it, but frustration does creep in when you are spending a lot of money and time on foods that are not eaten. I quickly realised that trying the Annabel Karmel 2 week plan at around ?80 for the week was not worth it when most was refused or splattered on the floor.

I would ask though and am genuinely interested...As per my previous thread about gagging and vomiting, I have approached finger foods and BLW warily as the resulting vomiting is very distressing for my baby. I backed off because she would find it so shocking and upsetting that I viewed this as being mentally scarring for her. However I know that in time her gag reflex will adjust so I have been trying to offer something at each mealtime with varied results. Given there are opinions on spoon-feeding and the effects of forceful feeding on babies, can I presume that people agree this violent vomiting is potentially damaging in the same way?

[Saffron]

If Baby is vomiting at every meal, then it probably is stressful. It's also a sign from Baby's body, that Baby is not ready for solids. Go back to milk only feeds for a few weeks.

There is a hypothesis that the separate sections of the alimentary tract have parallel development. So, as the mouth, tongue, and throat develop, so too do the intestines. Intestinal development is very complex. It includes maturation of cell-to-cell junctions, development of intestinal fauna, induction of enzymes, etc. If intestinal develpoment is not sufficient, then even if Baby takes solids, nutrients from these solids are not necessarily captured and processed by the immature intestines.

If you think Baby is capable of swallowing some soft solids, and you want to continue with spoon-feeding, try giving Baby the spoon and a little pot for herself. This lets Baby lead, while giving Mummy some control too. Have a look at PEDIATRIC CUTLERY: specially curved little spoons that are easier for Baby to handle.

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=pediatric+cutlery&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&biw=1024&bih=536

Good luck and happy weaning. xx

PS:

Fuschia, hillarious post about the Chinese restuarant metaphor... although I know some adults who would probably pay to have that kind of service for themselves! ;-)

[jennyh]

Thanks for that info, really interesting. She doesnt vomit at every meal as I held back on the vomit-enducing foods for the time being. She is fine taking purees when she feels like it, it is only things like chunks of rusk, bits of fruit and veg. Basically anything that isn't mushed!

We have had some success with the softer corn-type snacks as they dissolve easily in the mouth so we are practising with this to see what happens. She also likes to suck on things like strawberries until a bit breaks off and panic sets in! I have also made some purees a bit thicker and 'bitty' so she gets a bit more used to it. What a minefield! Fun Fun Fun!

Sorry SB for taking over your post!! :) Im done now!

[Fuschia]

mrs f Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Um could you try putting apple in with veg then

> gradually reducing the quantity of apple until

> it's just veg again?

There is evidence that would work!

[Fuschia]

I had some luck introducing parsnips to

My

Older child and squash by drizzling with honey the first few times

[hellosailor]

Can I just ask a quick question which is probably quite obviosu - let's say you have dropped the late morning milk feed and your baby has milk and then breakfast when they get up and then no milk again until the second milk feed of the day at 2:30 - with a solids lunch in between.

If you are taking a relaxed approach and not worrying if they reject most of their solids lunch, would you just give them an extra milk feed here instead?

i.e if they haven't had anything since breakfast, they're not going to settle for afternoon nap etc, get through to 2:30 milk feed, without something in their tummies, so rather than saying 'ok, they didn't want lunch' you substitute the food they rejected with milk at this time instead?

Just wondering cos if you end up doing this a fair bit then it feels a bit like 'going backwards' in that you're saying, ok, this isn't time for lunch, it's another milk feed, when you had dropped it. but I guess there's nothing else you can do cos you're not going to let them crack on without having a nice full tummy?

[snowboarder]

Hello sailor - yes - I think this is the reason I do want to get some food in my littlest because he has fitted nicely into napping at 9 and at 1, therefore lunch has replaced his 1pm ish feed. He's not been feeding well at all recently either - I'm hoping he's the world's most efficient feeder as he seems to feed so little - I do offer and he doesn't ask.

If he completely refused lunch I'd prob try to feed him before his nap, yes. I know ideally milk would have stayed the same until solids more established but it just wasn't working with combining 2 childrens eating and sleeping routines and him going longer in between sleeps.

[JessB]

Well, first child was never very excited about food, and still isn't really (now 2.5) and I was definitely concerned with quantities and making sure he had a "proper" meal etc and thus going through several options until he had had a satisfactory number of spoonfuls.

Now 1.5 months into weaning No.2 and I decided not to puree very much, and just to offer bits of whatever was going, finger food, on spoon, whatever. He is enjoying it and so am I. I am trying to think of "baby led" in the sense of if he's up for it great, and if he's not I am not going to sweat it. As it happens he is reaching for everything, which is something child No.1 NEVER did. So, I definitely think some are just not that into it and some are. But I do think we can try not to get too stressed about it and be bay led in that sense.

Ultimately, if they're hungry, they will probably eat enough and from experience, relaxed mealtimes are more important than getting them to eat too much. 7 month old baby is really showing his big brother up at the moment. and yes, I know it may well not last, but I'm enjoying it while it does. And really enjoying not making purees!!! Hooray!

PS I think baby sb is eating really well and a good range and you're only just starting really!