Plot to rename bonfire night

[mockney piers]

eh?

What happened to

d)mockney piers whiling away the soul crushing minutes of his life sat at his desk at work whilst bleating about nothing to no effect?

I feel left out :(

[StraferJack]

that's not just this thread mockers

[Ted Max]

Shorty's deffo to blame. He hasn't posted on the thread, but I suspect he's behind it somehow.

[StraferJack]

ooooooops - confused him on this thread with another

erm.. I'm off to apply for a job at Southwark council

sorry shorty

[Alan Medic]

I wouldn't mind if they renamed Trafalgar Square. I can pronounce square ok but for some reason the t word just doesn't roll off the tongue. I guess I'm the only one who has this problem and therefore no point in starting a petition. Do you think I may have a very obscure illness which science may pay loads to investigate?

[DulwichFox]

?55,000 can now be spent on fixing Southwark Councillors fish-ponds and dry-rot. :)) [JOKE]

Fox

[maxxi]

Rename it chavulgar square daahling, in honour of New Year festivities and let's start spelling the other one Lester godammit; no wonder our little ones are so confused.

[mockney piers]

I wonder if Spanish tourists wonder why on earth we have a square named after an obscure part of their south west coast.

If you mention the battle they'd probably be surprised that they had a navy at all, thinking it was sunk in 1588!

[RosieH]

Surely The Colour Thief is just a bloody name they've given to the thing. Like the fireworks and light and whatever the hell else they're throwing into the mix are attempting to tell some kind of story beyond, you know, not blowing up parliament. (Because we all know that while we may have forgotten the true meaning of winterval, we all of us stuff our faces with parkin and toffee apples and wave sparklers around while ruminating on the nature of democracy.)

Do any of you remember stories? The Christmas Ballet for instance. You know, the one with the wooden soldiers and the sugarplum fairy. Bloody politically correct wankers naming it after a kitchen utensil. I don't know. I blame the EU. Or the muslims. Or the marxists. Or Hermione. Or soft shandy-drinking Guardian readers.

I assume there's some interpretation, some story to be told, perhaps through the medium of arsey joykillers: first they're ruddy cheeked and indignant (colour). Then their faces blanch as their blood runs cold and they realise that they've been had, and are in fact, just a bunch of arsey joykillers and this is nothing to be so excited about (colour thievery). Up. In. Arms.

Mockers - you, me, a flask full of mulled cider, bobbing for apples in a riot of colour.

[computedshorty]

To blow up the Tower of London ?Now gives food for thoughts?,

I seem to remember someone mentioned a Guy named Fawkes.

With his friend?s he brought in many large barrels of gun powder,

the bigger the barrels the explosion would be so much louder.

He was not there to steal the Crown or Royal family Jewels,

as they found that he had taken with him no digging tools.

Before he found the time that he could strike the match.

he was taken by Warders and found guilty of a plot to hatch.

Today we remember the fireworks that would have been,

if they had not discovered in the cellars and been seen.

So the Ravens can still feed free on the Tower Green,

the Beefeater watches as their feathers they do preen.

To celebrate this non event, Fires and Fireworks display,

November the fifth this anniversary of that ancient day.

Let off you chosen Squib, Rocket or Katherine Wheel,

bought much earlier you were likely to get a good deal.

Whether you go to the Blackheath , or nearby Peckham Rye,

or to Dulwich Park the rockets will rise high into the sky.

Beware whilst holding that firework or banger in your hand,

an explosion in a closed hand then you will no longer stand.

The invitation asked of me to be your Guy for the large fire.

before reaching the top of the pile I would surely expire.

If its alright by you, I will stay behind in the dusky glimmer,

there at least I can take a rest on my faithful Zimmer.

[Moos]

Yeh, but Mockers, Rosie, can't we all buy a ticket to one of the scrillion other fireworks displays and mull our jerkins there like everyone else?

If Southwark are going to spend big bucks on a commoonity thingy, it would be a great idea to do something different or at least something on when there isn't much else. The weekends around Bonfire Night are full of events. How about an end-of-winter pig roasting, ale swilling party to cheer us all up in February?

[maxxi]

Moos Wrote:

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How about an

> end-of-winter pig roasting, ale swilling party to

> cheer us all up in February?

A quick search reveals on 1st or 2nd of February the festivals (by which I mean pagan and Christian) of Candlemass and Imbolc* - otherwise known as St. Brigid's day - meant to celebrate the arrival of spring. Just what we need after a miserable January and should satisfy the religious, the crystal-botherers and the 'what-about-a-party-then?' types (i.e. the rest of us).

Like many Celtic festivals, the Imbolc celebrations centred around the lighting of fires. Fire was perhaps more important for this festival than others as it was also the holy day of Brigid (also known as Bride, Brigit, Brid), the Goddess of fire, healing and fertility. The lighting of fires celebrated the increasing power of the Sun over the coming months. For the Christian calendar, this holiday was reformed and renamed 'Candlemas' when candles are lit to remember the purification of the Virgin Mary.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/1/14/Imbolc_Festival_February_3rd_2007.jpg/220px-Imbolc_Festival_February_3rd_2007.jpg

Imbolc-fest, Marsden West Yorks. Feb 2007.

So... fires, mulled things and wassail - and time for the council to spend what's left before the new financial year.

*"(pronounced 'im'olk' also known as Oimelc) comes from an Irish word that was originally thought to mean 'in the belly' although many people translate it as 'ewe's milk' (oi-melc)."

[mockney piers]

Excellent, nothing like a festival of historically dubious pedigree, retro fitted by crusty crystal types with a bit of 'celtic' thrown in to warm the cockles.

Paint me blue and call me mockvoc, I'm in!!!!!

[Moos]

I must have been channelling my distinguished great-great-grandmother McMoos The Doughty, famous for 5 villages around for her remarkable embroidery and champion arm-wrestler.

I'm well up for Imbolc. Huzzah.

[Rolo Tomasi]

Statement on Southwark Council's plans for Guy Fawkes Night 2011

Councillor Veronica Ward, Cabinet Member for Culture, Leisure and Sport at Southwark Council, said: "There is absolutely no truth in the claim that we want to rename Guy Fawkes Night.

"The facts of the matter are that we are currently consulting locally to see if people want a traditional fireworks display in the south of the borough. A decision on whether this goes ahead will be entirely up to them.

"Finally, the council will not be holding an event called 'The Colour Thief'. This was an earlier proposed theme - not agreed council policy - for a community event but has since been dropped."

[James Barber]

Hi Rolo Tomasi,

That statement is exactly the sort of this thing that gives politicans and PR people such bad names. It's full of lies and we've documentary proof it is.

79 local residents heard Verionica Ward last Thursday 15 September at Dulwich library during the Dulwioch Communminty Council hear her call it The Colour Thief.... and that although it would have some fireworks was not a firework night celebration or to be considered part of bonfire weekend despite being on 4 November.

The meeting was told by council officers the police were happy with the event and the attending local police had never heard of the proposals and were in fits of apoplexy making it clear they couldn't support it as its their busiest weekend of the year.

Veronica is a nce lady but she should just said she'd made a mistake and she was glad it was pointed out to her before it got messier.

[Ted Max]

Before it got messier. Yeah, imagine if it had somehow found its way to the national press and the council erroneously but effectively branded PCGM. Then it could have really gone off. She should def be sending you a note for saving her from that embarrassment.

[StraferJack]

""The facts of the matter are that we are currently consulting locally to see if people want a traditional fireworks display in the south of the borough. A decision on whether this goes ahead will be entirely up to them.

"Finally, the council will not be holding an event called 'The Colour Thief'. This was an earlier proposed theme - not agreed council policy - for a community event but has since been dropped.""

I'm not sure anything you assert is contradicted by Veronica's statement James?

"'The Colour Thief'. This was an earlier proposed theme" isn't a lie that you can contradict when your statement is "79 local residents heard Verionica Ward last Thursday 15 September at Dulwich library during the Dulwioch Communminty Council hear her call it The Colour Thief"

You are coming across as unreasonably obessed about this

[Annette Curtain]

Maybe it should have put it to the panel.

"Veronica is a nice lady" "She was glad" "It was pointed out" "Before it got messier"

http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01485/strictly-judges_1485215c.jpg

Nette:-S

[maxxi]

All disputatious parties should calm down and join us in (optional)naked fire-lit revelry and drunken carousing in February at ED's inaugural Imbolc festivities (Feb.

*Sparklers will be allowed. New age dance/music/colour thievery will be allowed but is likely to be mocked. Mulled cider and flasks of Hine vsop are recommended.*

[James Barber]

Hi Starferjack,

The colour thief was council policy. I was only when local cllrs insisted it was daft idea on so many levels that the administration agreed to hold a public consultation.

When press interest mounted the colour thief suddenly was nothing to do with the council.

As for the colour thief being something from the past - until 8am on tuesday when the administration read the South London Press it was their plan and policy.

[ianr]

Gawd. It's even been trailed for inclusion in the Radio 4 news Quiz, now on..

[Annette Curtain]

ianr Wrote:

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> Gawd. It's even been trailed for inclusion in the

> Radio 4 news Quiz, now on..

* James Barber licks finger a marks a number 1 on imaginary blackboard *

NETTE:)

[RosieH]

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[mockney piers]

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