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AIN'T IT GRAND TO BE BLOOMING WELL DEAD !

(Leslie Sarony)


Leslie Sarony - 1933



Lately there's nothing but trouble, grief and strife

There's not much attraction about this bloomin' life

Last night I dreamt I was bloomin' well dead

As I went to the funeral, I bloomin' well said,

Look at the flowers, bloomin' great orchids

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!

And look at the corfin, bloomin' great 'andles

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!


I was so 'appy to think that I'd popped off

I said to a bloke with a nasty, 'acking cough

Look at the black 'earse, bloomin' great 'orses

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!

Look at the bearers, all in their frock coats

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!

And look at their top 'ats, polished with Guinness

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!


Some people there were praying for me soul

I said, "It's the first time I've been off the dole"

Look at the mourners, bloomin' well sozzled

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!

Look at the children, bloomin' excited

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!

Look at the neighbours, bloomin' delighted

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!


"Spend the insurance", I murmered, "For alack,

You know I shan't be with you going back"

Look at the Missus, bloomin' well laughing

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!

Look at me Sister, bloomin new 'at on

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!

And look at me Brother, bloomin' cigar on

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!


We come from clay and we all go back they say

Don't 'eave a brick it may be your Aunty May

Look at me Grandma, bloomin' great haybag

Ain't it grand, to be bloomin' well dead!

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