Fashion advice for a mother who has lost her fashion mojo

[littleEDfamily]

Many moons ago, I used to be cool and stylish. Sadly, the unfortunate combination of years of wearing boring work clothes, followed by maternity gear, breastfeeding garb and then clothes covered in stains from my grubby brood has left my wardrobe sadly lacking.

I am ready to step out from the wilderness. I want good clothes again and I need advice please.

I would like what they call a 'capsule wardrobe', you know things that can be worn together in a number of ways, dressed up, dressed down etc. I tend to like fairly classic stuff with a quirky twist, and don't want chuck away fashion but rather some great pieces that don't date without having to take out a second mortgage. Love dresses, scarves, classic straight black trou. Don't do heels or anything uncomfortable, but like chic not sporty or overly trendy stuff.

Where would I go shopping to achieve these fanciful dreams? Help me!!!

[pebbles]

Before I got married my mother bought me a session to get my colours done - when someone basically tells you what colours suit you and what doesn't. I had always poo poo'd it however it was spot on, you put pastel colours by me and i look drawn and older and you put browns and oranges and i come alive...

anyway this fabulous woman also does a session where she meets with you and discusses your figure, what you need in your wardrobe etc etc and then she'll go out and fine everything that you need adn then you go shopping with her at a later date where she has put everything aside that suits you and you get to try on without having the hassle of the hunting!!! Anyway, my husband has actually bought me this amazing service as my xmas present and so now i'm trying to diet (not sucessfully at present) to get to goal weight and my treat will be to have this help with my wardrobe.

I totally understand that some people will feel this is a waste of money however i hate shopping and it's been sooooo long that i've liked my figure that i don't know what suits so this for me is worth every penny -

Anyway - her name is Kate Evans - http://www.kate-evans.co.uk/personal-shopping/

Whatever you choose and i'm sure there'll be lots of people to advise on the right shops - good luck and i just can't wait to be able to want to go shopping again to buy fab clothes :)

[littleEDfamily]

pebbles - thank you - I have just had a row with my unsympathetic husband who says I am cool enough to know what suits me and would be wasting money getting a personal shopper. But I detest shopping and want a fast track to fabulousness. Perhaps your hubby could have a word and also do a bit of gentle persuasion on getting le snip...?

[pebbles]

littleedf - that's really made me laugh :)

that's exactly what i feel - a fast track to fabulousness - however I think understandably my husband knows i'm not cool and it's not going to be a waste of money!!!

good luck with your persuasion... for the shopping of course :)

[Tanza]

I agree a personal shopper is a great way to ease yourself back into style. Selfridges has very stylish personal shoppers - the service is free but they demand a minimum spend of something like ?1000 and won't select from the cheaper brands. I think the free personal shopping service in Debenhams is a good bet. It's free and there is no minimum spend in fact there's no pressure to buy anything. You sit and read magazines while the shopper does all the legwork running round the shop selecting items for you. Then while you try them on the shopper does another swoop based on your immediate reaction. I thought the service was good. My only feeling was that the personal shoppers were not particularly cutting edge themselves. The selfridges shoppers were far better at grasping the look I was after ( I went in the days before the minimum spend)

[littleEDfamily]

What about if I were to go shopping myself - do you reckon a dept store like Selfridges is the place to go, or am I best to go to say the Kings Rd or Covent Garden? Any particular shops I should focus on? I do tend to like something a bit less 'high street' not for any other reason than I like to feel (whether true or not) that I have something a bit special other people don't know about. Any up and coming designers that aren't too wacky?

[womanofdulwich]

there is a service at the glades shopping centre bromely for a personal shopper that does all the shops there. i think it is free and it might give you a wider range of budgets.

[melbourne groover]

Try Cos, they do really cool classics with a twist. Just beside Liberty, and across the road (Regent st that is) there is Hoss Intropia. Marlene Birger also good, in various labels - By Marlene Birger/Day birger etc. Depends on yr budget and inclination I think...

If you decide on the personal shopper, I know a fab one. She can do a few hours with you or even just go through your wardrobe with you to work out what you like/what you suit/what you could be wearing. Can sometimes clarify it all. PM if you want the details.

But if you are confident on your own then the above is a good starting point!

[Saffron]

Wow I LOVE this thread. If you shop online, try People Tree for a mix of modern/quirky and classics:

http://www.peopletree.co.uk/

:)

[mrs f]

Hello little ed family...

So I work in fashion, not that I'm a fashionista or anything but I know a bit... (just about enough to get me through at work!)

Selfridges would be a good place to shop but it can be really overwhelming there just trying to find anything, id say liberty is possibly better, they have a really good mix of interesting designers & it's fairly small so not overwhelming.

Im not sure about these fashion ladies who tell you what suits you as I've never heard of anyone going to them, I'd imagine if you were totally clueless it would be brilliant but you may well be able to work out a 'new style' for yourself without having to pay.... I'd say that magazines (vogue, elle etc) are a good place to start, not to follow their recommendations to the letter but see what the 'trends' are and then decide what you think would suit you. Then go shopping armed with a few key items you would like to get, a great pair of jeans, a summer jacket etc.... Start with the basics and build on that.....

Someone mentioned coz & I'd second them, also Hobbs have started doing much more interesting things recently (but this all depends on your taste & style)

I'd offer to come shopping with you if I weren't 39 weeks pregnant myself!

Good luck & enjoy it!

[nikki73]

I can so relate to this thread. What's happened to my dress sense! So thinking back to when I still shopped... Was also going to suggest cos. They have great designs. Wouldn't have thought of hoss intropia but yes their clothes and accessories are gorgeous. Maybe comptoirs des cotonniers? Tara jarmon is nice and I think j Lewis might stock it.

[melbourne groover]

Comptoir des Cotonniers - definately good. Also Zadig and Voltaire for a dash of French rock chick if you are down South Molten St ;-)

[sanity girl]

This is a great thread. Where can you get Comptoir des Cotonniers? Perhaps we should organise a joint shopping trip to a few select shops where we can act as each others' personal shoppers and say honestly what suits and what doesn't! Don't know when I'll find the time though, as a *gulp* very recently single mum with a 6 month and 4 year old...

[Norfolkvillas]

My sister hates shopping, and once every few years has a massive online shopping blowout whereby she trawls the internet, orders everything she sees that she likes, in a variety of sizes, usually spending around ?2k in total. Then it all arrives, she tries all of it on, figures out which items work in a number of different combinations: this makes up her capsule wardrobe and she sends the rest of it back. She usually keeps around ?500 - ?600 worth, ends up with a great choice of outfit combinations, all from the comfort of her own living room. Reiss is good for classics with a twist, and the sale sections of Matches, Net-a-Porter, and Liberty websites are always worth keeping an eye on...

[nikki73]

Kings road opposite peter Jones and used to ne one in south Moulton but haven't been that way in ages so worth double checking

[gwod]

This lady is excellent and will come to you house to work with your existing wardrobe, altering pieces, making couture items, suggesting additions etc etc to enable you to have a capsule wardrobe - but she's not cheap. (she did work at Harvey Nicks as a personlal shopper for a while.

http://www.rebeccajames.biz/index.html

[womanofdulwich]

what a great idea for any woman who is about to return to work after a break! how much moeny are we talking about for a day?any idea?

[melbourne groover]

I don't think you have to spend a fortune on a stylist. My friend who does it was a buyer for years and has revolutionised the wardrobes of a few people I know. She is really reasonable (and local). I think she recommends a few hours shopping and not sure about the wardrobe refresh but would think a few hours would be enough for that also.

[reneet]

I don't know about image consultants, I had tasters with a few some years back and was not satisfied with any of them, I felt I was not me in what they choose or suggested. Although they were right about the colours that suit me. Anyway I am the least fashionable person I know, after years of spending all my time in ugly suits, the a few years of nothing but jeans and t-shirts, I am now very lost. Maybe after my mat leave(which I have not even started yet), I should embark on reinventing myself.

[littleEDfamily]

Thanks ladies - so much great advice.

I am going to try and sort this out myself, rather than with a stylist initially. I have thought about it and I think I know what suits me, I am have just been too lazy to apply myself to getting out there and making it happen.

So, assuming I am starting from scratch and getting the essentials, what do you think about this as a shopping list and any thoughts as to the best place to go for each item:

1. Classic black trou - straight leg, dress up or down type style

2. Very cool jeans - (I am not thin enough for really skinny jeans, but I do like the look of them)

3. A complete 'going out' outfit (I have a night out with school mums in a month or two and have no idea what one might wear - I don't want to wear heels though, as heels make me angry and walk like a man) Oh where to start!!!!

4. Tops??? What sort of tops??? Does Topshop, do as the name would imply, do really good tops or will they just fall apart?

5. Shoes - I wear Bensimmon plimsouls for all of the time I am not wearing ugg boots or flipflops. Any ideas around cool flat day shoes and where to buy?

6. Summer-ish jacket (I actually have one of these - navy blue, sits at the hip - it's a classic style and very 'me')

7. Tailored shorts - like the idea of this, but what does one wear on top so as to avoid looking too American?

8. Dresses - a day dress and maybe a dressier dress

9. Cardigans (I feel like an old woman just writing that word, but sensible me says one needs at least a couple in the English climate)

10. A nice necklace?

I'm going to buy Elle instead of Elle Decoration for the next couple of months!! The idea of buying a whole bunch of stuff online and then returning 3/4 of it is very appealing, but deep down I think committing to a proper day or two shopping is the way forward...

PS Edited to add, I do like pretty things and prints as well as black and navy!

[womanofdulwich]

Im pretty sure a white shirt is a part of every capsule wardrobe.

maybe the floral stuff can come from scarves/ accessories. Good luck.

[QueenBeeStyling]

Hello Little ED Family,

I'm a local mum with two children and have recently set up my own personal styling company, Queen Bee Styling. Having worked in the fashion industry for 20 years I decided to set up the business in response to so many mums feeling just like you, myself included. Most mums I work with spend so much time focusing on the little ones that they forget about themselves but it's not too difficult to get back on track.

I'm not going to give you the hard sell because you have been given some great advice but I'm happy to talk to you, free of charge, if you would like a bit more advice.

As well as the usual personal styling services, i.e. personal shopping, wardrobe refreshes and style sessions we also hold styling parties. These are a great way to enjoy an evening with the girls in the comfort of your own home. We cover a range of topics such as: the latest trends, how to make the most of your body shape, building a capsule wardrobe, jeans (best brands, fit and where to shop for them) and how to accessorise. We're also looking to hold workshops at a local venue where there will be a small charge on the door. These group events give you a really good introduction to personal styling at a fraction of the price, having said that our prices are very reasonable.

If you would like more information please email me at [email protected] (our website should be finished soon)

hope to speak to you soon

Sally

[Moos]

My advice re: jeans would be to go to Selfridges and get them to do a Bodymetrics assessment, which will help them find a pair of jeans that suit your shape. I ended up with Serfontaines, which I'm very happy with. They're expensive, but I wear jeans so much (having sadly also lost what fashion mojo I ever had) that it's worth it. I'd also say that tops, cardigans and accessories such as sunglasses are the things to follow current trends with - assuming you like the trends - as they'll need regular replacement anyway. Have fun!

[mrs f]

1. Classic black trou - straight leg, dress up or down type style Hmmmm... I always get my smart trousers from Paul Smith.... but that might be a bit too smart.... perhaps Hobbs or Cos?

2. Very cool jeans - (I am not thin enough for really skinny jeans, but I do like the look of them) go for a straight leg then, a super skinny jean only really works well if you are SUPER skinny or are wearing heels, for the jeans, it depends on your shape, go to liberties or selfridges and try them all on... nudie and severnfor all mankind are good, but it depends on your shape

3. A complete 'going out' outfit (I have a night out with school mums in a month or two and have no idea what one might wear - I don't want to wear heels though, as heels make me angry and walk like a man) Oh where to start!!!! Get either a great pair of flat 'dressy' sandals (invaluable anyway) or a pair of really pretty pumps.... in terms of the outfit, that depends on you, a simple dress that you can accssorise is always good, then you can dress it up or down, if you have that great pair of jeans then get a dressy top and that can do the trick of looking good withought trying too hard (which is never a good look!)

4. Tops??? What sort of tops??? Does Topshop, do as the name would imply, do really good tops or will they just fall apart? um, topshop are great but really it's only worth bothering with the oxford circus one and looking at all the boutique and other 'designer' ranges they have, the rest is mostly tat (nice tat but yes it won't last you forever) but they are brilliant for basics.... I agree that a good white shirt is a basic (if shirts are your thing?) otherwise, silk is always great for dressing up, basic but very pretty vests are great in the summer, these are the things that change the most in your wadrobe (if you think of your trousers, shoes and jackets etc as your investment peices then your tops can change more with the seasons, so go Safari if that is 'the look' this summer)

5. Shoes - I wear Bensimmon plimsouls for all of the time I am not wearing ugg boots or flipflops. Any ideas around cool flat day shoes and where to buy? have a look at Paul Smith 'men only' shoes, brogues, moccasins etc, they are very 'on trend' but also flat, sensible and comfortable!

6. Summer-ish jacket (I actually have one of these - navy blue, sits at the hip - it's a classic style and very 'me') Perfect, a 'men's style' jacket is also a brilliant one in a nice colour to instantly smarten up a pair of jeans and a vest...

7. Tailored shorts - like the idea of this, but what does one wear on top so as to avoid looking too American?

8. Dresses - a day dress and maybe a dressier dress Tailored shorts are definatly a great idea for the summer.... I would go to the high street for these as the shapes change so often, perhaps even gap, cos, Nicole Fahi

9. Cardigans (I feel like an old woman just writing that word, but sensible me says one needs at least a couple in the English climate) Cardians are a must really...... and get them anywhere, invest in some classics and then buy some more high street throw away ones. Try lots of shapes on, eg long 'boyfriend' short cute ones etc and see what works with you, also think about outfits, I have some short 'cute' ones which are great with dresses or dressing up etc and more boyfriend for casual looks

10. A nice necklace? well of course! try Kabiri or ECone.....

For shoes try selfridges shoe lounge or poste mistress for great selections (also paul smith men only styles)

actually, ASOS I think is a really good website for a mix of designer and highstreet as well as net a porter for designer designer (great for inspration too) and the outnet for designer bargains

remember, get the basics right, a great pair of jeans, a jacket, shoes, handbag etc and the rest you can play around with....

enjoy!

[Belle]

I have a v cute cropped Hobbs cardie that's very useful (raspberry pink), or there's a place called woollovers I think it is, they have a website - friend got me a lovely cardie from there. Also boyfriend cardies are useful, can just get from likes of M&S/Gap/even Primark (though the latter won't last long).

Massimo Dutti is a nice make, there's one on Regent's street - don't think online though - Zara-esque but perhaps slightly more classic. In answer to both your tops and shorts question, they do nice tops/blouses there as do Zara - from crisp white shirts to peasant style blouses, would imagine they'd look nice with shorts? Great Plains (sister company of FCUK, good website) also do loads of nice blouses at reasonable prices, quite well made I think.

How do you feel about wedges? Russell &Bromley tend to do a nice peep toe/sling back wedge style every summer, i've had mine for about 3 years now and still going strong - could work for your going out outfit.