daughter denied medical care by father

[Angelina]

one of my daughters lives with her dad and I've just found out that he refuses to take her to the doctor.

She's been diagnosed anorexic and had been referred to a dieticain - he's not been taking her to appointments and when I've asked him to go back to the GP he says he will but he has not. He has just told her that he will not take her either.

He's agreed she can move back with me (as he can't cope with her) but refuses to sign the paperwork.

While his is going back to court, I've tried to take her to my GP in London, but because it's a longer term treatment than an emergency (visit) they won't see her.

They live outside of London so I'm planning on going down there to the GP with her one day after school.

Will the GP make notes of the lack attention he's providing, as well as the stressful/ circumstances she's in?

he's particularly controlling and she's quite scared of him finding out.

I want a proper medical record and a referral to a psychiatrist in London, which I'll arrange privately.

[frump]

Anyone with a local GP can self-refer/refer their child (up to the age of 18) for treatment to the Child and Adolescent Eating Disorders Service at the Michael Rutter Centre, Maudsley Hospital. Treatment with a private psychiatrist may not provide an evidence based intervention which should be offered by a multi disciplinary team. There is no need to pay for a service when a NHS centre offers a really high level of care for no charge.

[Angelina]

yes, thanks - but this is the problem - she cannot be supported in London unless she is registered in London.

Hence my quandary - she is not accessing the support that there is, where she is, as her father is not supporting her and taking her to the appointments.

[Otta]

Sounds like a clear safeguarding issue (neglect). Tell him to sign the papers to hand her back to you, or you'll report him to social services (who have to take safeguarding concerns very seriously).

[Saffron]

I agree this is a safeguarding issue (potential medical neglect). Not only should the GP make note of the father's refusal, it would maybe useful to discuss it with her school as well. They may be able to offer avenues for support that you've not previously considered. Plus it gives you an additional layer of official documentation.

In general I think the NHS is brilliant, but sometimes getting a kick start through private services can be beneficial. Try contacting Dr Jeremy Pfeffer: http://www.harleystreetguide.co.uk/doctors/find-a-specialist/?entryid43=105164

[Jules-and-Boo]

..

[Angelina]

Thanks for the recommendation

I made an appointment with her and her GP for Friday. I made my concerns known. Also contacted school as she was sick this morning and he made her walk to school in pain.

The doctor invited dad to the appointment -he's absolutely livid I've done such a thing.

He's sending her step mum as he can't make it, which will be fun as they don't get along.

Is she allowed in if she doesn't have parental responsibility.

She needs to know what the doctor says, but I also want a private conversation to discuss other concerns.

[etta166]

Your child (of any age) is entitled to confidential medical treatment. Even when my daughter was in a neonatal unit and therefore still only days/weeks old, parents had to leave for the ward round to preserve the confidentiality of the other patients. Your child can ask to be seen alone, with you, or with any other adult that she likes. She can also ask that any particular person is not present as well.

[Pugwash]

This appears to be a child safeguarding situation - she is afraid of her father (why what will he do?) she is being neglected health wise and emotionally abused. You do not state her age and who has parental responsibility, is there a residence order in place issued by courts.

Obviously you do not state the reason why your child is living with her father. Have the school noticed that her health is suffering and has she confided in them about being afraid of her father? Both yourself and the school can report to social services in the area that she is living. They have a duty to investigate, also you mention the courts - they need to be aware of the situation and if no agreement can be made - could make her a ward of court.

[IlonaM]

I agree with obtaining as much paper evidence as possible for if and when you need to go back into court.

I would suggest getting some legal advice on this (if you haven't already). The charity Rights of Women offers an advice line for family law issues, with a dedicated number for women in London (see below), as well as information on their website:

http://rightsofwomen.org.uk/get-information/family-law/

Family law

?Your service has begun to turn my life around. After 5 years in the court systems with poor legal support, I have now taken control and your advice was instrumental in safeguarding my five year old who was exposed to violence and abuse during contact with her father. I would not be here without you and cannot thank you enough.?

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