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Wedding first dance and pre marriage counselling recommendations

Blueskye

By Blueskye
in The Lounge

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rendelharris

rendelharris

Posted
Posted

Good God.


No recommendations I'm afraid but I'd like to take the liberty of wishing you the very best of luck as a counterbalance to the previous. Best thing I ever did, don't know if the Mrs agrees of course...

pop9770

pop9770

Posted
Posted

rendelharris


Sounds like you have a Victorian marriage moneys on the Mrs shagging her tennis coach or someone through work


If not you're one in a million ...


;)


Romantics it starts out all Mills and Boon and ends up in court with a big legal bill.

pop9770

pop9770

Posted
Posted

I'm not a hater I'm a realist.


If you're going to commit yourself to a voluntary life sentence then it's best to go into it with your eyes wide open,, the OP appears to understand that wanting pre marriage councilling is a great idea,,, they appreciate it's probably better not to leave it to luck..


Really hope they are happy ever after, for that outcome many factors need consideration I'm only offering a realistic route to getting all those factors out in the open.


Maybe watch the youtube video before you assume ?

clockworkorange

clockworkorange

Posted
Posted

Bore off pop...


Go big and original on the first dance. Dont go mushy. Show your personality in it.

We had a jungle track. We smashed it. Everybody loved it and remembers it.


Premarriage counselling- they become the person you proposed to/agreed to Marry about 30seconds after you say "I do". Dont panic just yet if you're fearing the wedding planning has changed them! They'll return to normal...

malleymoo

malleymoo

Posted
Posted
Blue Skye. There is a local company Just Dance who I would recommend. They do wedding dances as well as run some fantastic Zumba and Dance classes locally. Fi and Dommie are creative and really good at nurturing less experienced dancers. This is the website address http://justdanceuk.com/
pop9770

pop9770

Posted
Posted

johnie Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> No, you're a hater



Have you even watched the video I linked to?


It's not hateful or boring it's real fun and ends on in positive way.



Calling me hater is hatefully..

Earl Aelfheah

Earl Aelfheah

Posted
Posted
I am not sure you've watched it tbh. He commends marriage, and is rather dismissive of polyamory..Just suggests people understand the trade offs, are self aware, realistic in their expectations and good humoured.
pop9770

pop9770

Posted
Posted

I'm not recommending any of the three options I listed, I'm recommending a video :)

As a first step before spending money on pre marriage counselling.


My view is marriage was invented at a time when peoples life expectancy was low 30ish years, doesn't really match with todays reality. Imho


But if you're going to do it may as well be fully armed with the reality of the romantic delusion.

malumbu

malumbu

Posted
Posted

I'll watch the whole thing another time.


From my perspective much of it is driven by endorphins early in a relationship. Difficult to keep that going all your life!


Here's a nice clip


www.youtube.com/watch?v=S_kI5Xh4zxo


I hope I haven't offended anyone, not this time at least!

Grok

Grok

Posted
Posted

If you need pre-marriage counselling, (Lordy, whatever next), then do not get married, simple as that. Sorts out the first dance 'dilemma'!

As for a jungle track dance being "smashed" and "remembered", well I am utterly sure it was..

pop9770

pop9770

Posted
Posted

rahrahrah Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Everything he says is common sense. I think he

> actually does your average person a massive

> disservice in thinking they're more naive than is

> the case


hahaha


Don't for one minute underestimate how naive young and old "in love" people are.


A modern day philosopher who has his finger bang on the pulse of our "modern" world vs some councilor?

JohnL

JohnL

Posted
Posted

pop9770 Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Some advice from my friends and family ie 100s of

> years of experience

>

> Options are

> 1. Don't get married

> 2. Go polyamorous marriage

> 3. Live like a Victorian

>

> IMHO You should both watch this before you go and

> see a counselor

>

>



I'm covering up the chair legs at the moment (for option 3)

Mick Mac

Mick Mac

Posted
Posted

We got pre marriage counselling from a priest (compulsory if you are getting married in a catholic church, which I only did to keep my parents happy). Not sure how much he knew would / could know about marriage though.


He basically said, you will have a fair few arguments. Don't expect the perfect love-in to last forever. Learn to get through the difficult periods as best you can.


Having said that I'm not sure how much he knew about marriage, it turns out he knows all about it.


There are quite a few failed marriages in ED - so to be honest you might love the person forever and you might not. Be ready for some difficult times, but all in all it's definitely worth it. Particularly if you have children, they bring their own pressures, massive lifestyle changes, hard work and great joys and rewards. Its a team effort.

malumbu

malumbu

Posted
Posted
Mate went to a Catholic Boarding School. Funnily enough the priests did a lot better at explaining sex education than the head teacher. That isn't saying anything more than what you said above (ie just because you don't partake doesn't mean you can't advise)

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