ED Barber - homophobia? racism? and a bad haircut

[catch21]

I am struggling with the OP assertion that someone who I presume does not have English as their first language is using a phrase such as 'likes it up the batty'.

I think Les Dawson might have deployed this sort of use of language - but a young Turkish hairdresser in 2016....

More to this than meets the eye methinks - barber wars perhaps..

For what it is worth, I was there only the day before this alleged occurrence and the barber was French/Algerian....

[Sue]

catch21 Wrote:

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> I am struggling with the OP assertion that someone

> who I presume does not have English as their first

> language is using a phrase such as 'likes it up

> the batty'.

>

> I think Les Dawson might have deployed this sort

> of use of language - but a young Turkish

> hairdresser in 2016....

>

> More to this than meets the eye methinks - barber

> wars perhaps..

>

> For what it is worth, I was there only the day

> before this alleged occurrence and the barber was

> French/Algerian....

"Barber wars?"

First, several other people on this thread have had similar experiences at this place.

Second, the OP has called out racist posts on other threads.

Good on you for challenging them, Jim1234, it isn't easy.

[Jim1234]

To clarify, the guy cutting my hair was British in that he spoke with a British accent, assumedly of Turkish decent and appeared to speak Turkish as a second language.

I promise I'm not a local barber trying to undermine a rival local business, but I guess I can't prove that.

[keane]

Just read all this & thought as another voice maybe I should add that my other half & our kids beeen having haircuts at mem's since it opened and have always found the staff courteous and good cuts. We personally have never witnessed anything like this in their shop. From the Op's post it sounds this was chat between two barbers - yes unacceptable language but hardly a police matter?

[Mick Mac]

keane Wrote:

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> Just read all this & thought as another voice

> maybe I should add that my other half & our kids

> beeen having haircuts at mem's since it opened and

> have always found the staff courteous and good

> cuts.

I'd like to add to that. I took my 6 year old son for a haircut there about 6 months ago. For a 6 year old a haircut by a person they don't know can be quite intimidating, especially as our son has generally had a haircut from my mums hairdresser who visits the house.

Throughout the whole haircut the guy cutting my son's hair was having a conversation at the top of his voice across the room to the girl who takes the money, about dates and nights out. He didn't say a single word to my son or ask if he was ok throughout the haircut. I felt inclined to go over to my son a couple of times to check he was ok although the barber took no account of this. I think for a child a few words of comfort and encouragement are appropriate to make them feel comfortable.

That's more of a "review" than anything connected to the OP - on arrival and leaving they were courteous but on this occasion they could have done much better. Speak to the customer, don't speak at length amongst yourselves, as if the customer isn't there.

[Suffer-not]

Jah Lush Wrote:

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I've found a very nice chap at bottom of

> Melbourne Grove near the station who I now use

> regularly and highly recommend.

I went to that guy a few times ( after Ken on NCR retired) as he usually didnt have a queue. Now I know why!

He fails to do what you tell him -despite me emphasising the requirements on several different ocasions. He does the same job whatever you ask him ie a 1940's haircut that is verging on short back and sides. He seems incapable of a moderate cut that is left out over the ear. It's not a language issue as he speaks quite good English. I moved elsewhere because of this.

It's a sign of the times though that appears every barber in ED is from foreign shores and the turnover of staff is quite high. Before anyone accuses me of xenophobia let me say that I am pleased to say that I now go to an immigrant chap who does exactly what I want so much so that I have got back into the habit of tipping again!

And the worst barber in town, you may ask? It is the lady at the barbers near William Rose. She raes through the job in a quarter of the normal time, makes a real salping of it and seems desperate to get out to have a cigarette. Avoid!

[steveo]

'Immigrant chap'?

[Suffer-not]

steveo Wrote:

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> 'Immigrant chap'?

Yes, he said he recently migrated from Syria. What's wrong with being an immigrant?

Edited to correct typo

[Jeremy]

I like the sound of this 1940's "short back and sides" barber. I might try him... if he doesn't ask me what team I support, or where I'm going on holiday, then even better.

[titch juicy]

I'm just glad some comfort has been found on here in these difficult times.

[steveo]

Jeremy Wrote:

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> I like the sound of this 1940's "short back and

> sides" barber. I might try him... if he doesn't

> ask me what team I support, or where I'm going on

> holiday, then even better.

Or if you want something for the weekend

[JohnL]

tutorse22 Wrote:

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> Kudos to Jim for saying something. It's not always

> easy to speak up in these situations, even when

> you v much want to.

>

> I've been reading recently on another thread

> elsewhere about similar types of "micro

> aggressions", and one commentator I very much

> respect has suggested that these moments,

> uncomfortable as they may be, should be seen as

> opportunities to engage . We're entering

> difficult times here, and courage to engage with

> the "other" side is increasingly important?

Hope we aren't going to regress as a country into hate.

I remember calling out some guys in a local bar in Egypt and them

saying I could get away with anything as a tourist but if they

talked to me outside the private hotels the police would beat them up.

Of course in the Hotel bars you got treated like royalty.

[Seabag]

They are as Jah says "tosspots"

Go to see Shaun at the end of Barry Road, he's a very good barber and a decent human being.

He's good with the kids too.

[Mick Mac]

Seabag Wrote:

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> They are as Jah says "tosspots"

>

> Go to see Shaun at the end of Barry Road, he's a

> very good barber and a decent human being.

>

> He's good with the kids too.

Sean is the perfect barber and I used to go there on weekends when I had more time. Unfortunately as I work full time it's easier to get it cut in the evening on the way home. I miss my chats with Sean and I hope he is well.

[Jah Lush]

Does Sean still serve beer?

[mikeb]

He did when I went in September.

[Jah Lush]

Suffer-not Wrote:

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> It's a sign of the times though that appears every

> barber in ED is from foreign shores and the

> turnover of staff is quite high. Before anyone

> accuses me of xenophobia let me say that I am

> pleased to say that I now go to an immigrant chap

> who does exactly what I want so much so that I

> have got back into the habit of tipping again!

WTF is this shit? Well now you mention it. You doing them a favour by turning up for a haircut? You want to try thinking a little bit more before you post this kind of crap if you don't want come across as a Daily Mail/Express/Sun reading xenophobe.

BTW - My dad used to take me to a Turkish/Cypriot barber shop on Grove Vale in the 60s where the nail bar is now. Lovely man, obviously long gone now. I also went to a similar place in Peckham too as well as Segars up by the Plough and Jansens on Half Moon Lane (also long gone) I haven't noticed any difference since those days.

[tutorse22]

@Suffer-not

"Yes, he said he reently migrated from Syria. What's worong with being an immigrant?"

No-one is suggesting there is anything wrong with being an immigrant. But don't you agree it would be more respectful, not to mention accurate, to think of him as, say, a "Syrian" or a "person from Syria", rather than simply an "immigrant chap", which implies that all of us immigrants (for I am one too) belong in one big pile, regardless of where we come from?

[TonyQuinn]

I haven't posted for a while but just want to say that I once went to this establishment and had to tell them to keep the noise down within seconds of entering. Shockingly loud banter....it may have been football-related but there was a nasty edge. I think someone has to tell the manager that the behaviour of the two guys in there is unacceptable. Very much doubt that either of those two guys is Mem.

[Borky]

http://peckhampeculiar.tumblr.com/post/107781448439/cutting-humour

Steve has been in Peckham for half a century now. I am surprised that no one has mentioned this place.

[Bic Basher]

I use the Mem's in Penge. None of the alpha male/homophobic behaviour alleged here has happened in that barbers and also ?1 cheaper than the Dulwich one.

[Nigello]

I went in the other day, on a whim, having seen that the "monologue" barber wasn't there. But he was, and stepped out from behind the internal door just as I was being shown where to sit by another. His chat was not sweary, not offensive or even that dull, but on the loud side and with plenty of asides to the others. A mum and child were dealt with kindly and warmly and the cut was 7/10 but when I paid and didn't tip the chat was dispensed with immediately and I didn't even get a goodbye or thank you. It's a good looking shop that has helped revive that parade so I hope it won't go but I can see why it may need a, ahem, "more customer-focused attitude".

[Suffer-not]

tutorse22 Wrote:

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@Suffer-not

"Yes, he said he reently migrated from Syria.

What's worong with being an immigrant?"

>

> No-one is suggesting there is anything wrong with

> being an immigrant. But don't you agree it would

> be more respectful, not to mention accurate, to

> think of him as, say, a "Syrian" or a "person from

> Syria", rather than simply an "immigrant chap",

> which implies that all of us immigrants (for I am

> one too) belong in one big pile, regardless of

> where we come from?

No I don't agree with you.

Before you shoot your mouth off with another knee jerk reaction, read the entire paragraph as follows ......"" It's a sign of the times though that appears every barber in ED is from foreign shores and the turnover of staff is quite high. Before anyone accuses me of xenophobia let me say that I am pleased to say that I now go to an immigrant chap who does exactly what I want so much so that I have got back into the habit of tipping again! ""

It was an obervation on the demographic of barbers in the area and how pleased I was with the immigrant barber I now have. Or perhaps you do not know the meaning of the noun "chap". Looking it up in https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/chap, it says it is ""dated A friendly form of address between men and boys:?best of luck, old chap?""

It says it is "friendly". No mention of disrespect- as you suggest.

So you can climb off your pedestal "old chap" and get a grip of your emotions. Kindly engage brain before mouth.

[tutorse22]

@Suffer-not I have not been rude to you and I would ask you please not to be rude to me either. I do not expect to change your mind in a brief exchange on an internet forum, but I'm still going to put this out there for whatever small benefit it may be.

- If you know the person's provenance, in this case Syria, it would be more respectful and accurate to call him "Syrian", or, "Syrian chap" if you must -- although I draw your attention to the "dated" in the OED definition, and ask you to consider that the colloquial use of this word in 2016 is different to what it was long ago.

- If you know the person's provenance -- whether it be Syrian, French, Nigerian, Australian, or wherever - and continue to call him an "immigrant chap", ask yourself why are not calling him or her by his/her nationality.

- Think of another person who is an immigrant. Think, perhaps, of a friend who has emigrated to Australia for the good weather. Would you call him an "immigrant chap"? If not, why not? What about a white French guy working in Goldman Sachs in New York. Is he an "immigrant chap"? If not, why not?

[Suffer-not]

Jah Lush Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Suffer-not Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

>

> > It's a sign of the times though that appears

> every

> > barber in ED is from foreign shores and the

> > turnover of staff is quite high. Before anyone

> > accuses me of xenophobia let me say that I am

> > pleased to say that I now go to an immigrant

> chap

> > who does exactly what I want so much so that I

> > have got back into the habit of tipping again!

>

> WTF is this shit? Well now you mention it. You

> doing them a favour by turning up for a haircut?

> You want to try thinking a little bit more before

> you post this kind of crap if you don't want come

> across as a Daily Mail/Express/Sun reading

> xenophobe.

>

Well Jah Lush, your comments certainly illustrate two things:-

1. You are a reactionary foul-mouthed left-wing bigot. And a tosspot - to use one of your favourite put-downs.

2. Your standard of posts has not improved much since you posted this recently ...

.......""Utter fecking dogshit for morons. It was a pathetic excuse for comedy 40 years ago. All these remakes are for feeble minded old dingbats."".......

As you seem to have a problem and lots of spare time, I suggest you invest in one of these...

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Swear-word-coloring-book-Relaxation/dp/1522921354