nap conundrums

[Belle]

The mythical 1-3 nap still evades my little one. Naps are basically driving me mad - please help if you've had similar experiences.

My son is 18 months so by rights should be down to one nap I guess. I don't really mind which it is - just want to get it right at least half of the time, as at the moment it's always going wrong. Basically I can stick to the 9am and 2pm (ish) naps - but then some days he just refuses the 9am nap. He'll then crash later in buggy/cot and because he's so knackered, he doesn't sleep that long, then is crabby all day. So next day I might think, ok, we'll h old out till post lunch. Same thing - too knackered, so 9 times out of 10 he crashes before we get home and has rubbish buggy nap, or is overtired when he does hit the cot and doesn't sleep for more than an hour - then crabby all afternoon. Tried bringing it forward - makes no difference. Also, if he has a morning nap, he absolutely refuses to have afternoon nap in buggy. Can coax him into one in the cot but it's as th ough he can just about get by without it when out and about - until we get home, when he's clearly overtired, won't eat tea etc. If i'm going out for the day I usually try to either get by on the morning nap (usually means meltdown around 4) or hope for a quick buggy nap around the middle of the day (but if he doesn't manage it means he refuses lunch).

it's really driving me mad, and it doesn't help that i've taken on some freelance so his naptimes are now even more valuable to me than ever. It's not just about me though - I'm conscious that the current system or lack of it is meaning he's knackered and grumpy most afternoons. It's also limiting our days out etc as I've realised only way to avoid this is to have nap in cot in afternoon. anyone else in nap hell?

[kristymac1]

I remember when my daughter dropped her morning nap (I thought my life would end....) and she struggled to get to 1o'clock for her normal 2hr sleep, so I moved it to around 11am and then she had her lunch around 1pm when she woke up. It really just meant that we had less time to do things in the morning but more free time in the afternoon, eventually she shifted her nap back to around 1pm - the most important thing for her at that age was that she got good quality and good quantity sleep (so always in a cot unfortunately) rather than the time which she had it. She's always been a rubbish sleeper in the nighttime (was gone 3yr before she went through the night with any consistency), good daytime naps means she's always a fairly happy thing during the day.

Hope that helps x

[Fuschia]

It does sound like he is in transition. I think trying to keep him awake in the morning by taking him out, very early lunch at 11 and then try a cot-nap, at least until it's established, is probably the way to go.

[crystal7]

I was going to post something similar! E is 18 months too and cannot even get to 11. She mostly has a short nap on the way to a morning activity, 9.15-9.45 and then sleeps after lunch from about 1-2.30 ish (sometimes less). The probem is she still wakes at 5.30 most mornings and I'm sure it's because she's getting too much sleep in the day. But it's a catch 22 situation because she is so tired by 9 or so that it would take serious entertainment to keep her awake and we'd need to stay at home as she'd sleep if we went out in the buggy...She seems to be the only 18 month old I know still having 2 naps! Keep hoping it will happen naturally but maybe she needs a shove in the right direction?!

On the days I work she often falls asleep around 7.30-8ish and has 20 minutes in the buggy on the way to her childminder and then crashes at 11.30-1 and has a late lunch. This makes no difference to the tme she wakes up in the morning although she fall asleep quicker at night...

Sorry no advice just wanted to let you know not all 18 month olds are doing 1-3!

[Sanne Panne]

We also did the 11am thing with lunch after the nap and gradually moved it to 1pm. We stayed indoors in the mornings most days to avoid accidental buggy naps until nap time had consistently reached 12pm so we could safely be out from 9am-11am.

[Fuschia]

Mine still fall asleep in the morning if we are in the car for any length of time... but that's handy actually for days out!

[Belle]

We did try the 11-1 for a bit - first day was amazing, thought we'd cracked it, then got progressively worse so that by day 3 or 4 he only napped 40 mins - then nothing more for rest of day.

today, for the first time in a few days, he refused a morning nap - tried for 40 mins or so but eventually gave up. We went out and about and I assumed he'd nap at some point since he'd had no sleep all day. got to 2.30 and he finally, after protesting, did fall asleep in buggy. Woke up 15 mins later. Nothing since, and consequently v tired grotty baby (and frazzled mum). I've found there's no correlation between daytime sleep and early waking Crystal7 - last week my son had two 1.5 hr naps, then slept till 7.10 (v rare round here!) - then a few days later had 40 mins total nap and same waking next day. Equally we've had several 5.30 wakeups this week and 6ish too, with varying amounts of daytime nap. It's like a bloody puzzle that's unbreakable!

I think if it was just that he didn't need the sleep anymore, tough as it might be, I could accept it. But since there are days when he does happily sleep a couple of hours, that doesn't seem to be the case - so it's the unpredictability I can't handle.

[Maki]

My 18 month old has fallen into a habit of napping 50 mins from 11.30 Monday - Thursday (at nursery - 2 staff have to shake a beanbag for 10 mins!), then on a Friday she crashes the minute we leave the house at whatever time that might be (in the buggy or in the car - never in a cot) and at the weekend she holds out until after lunch and sometimes has up to 2 hours sleep (in the buggy).

I can't figure it out and I've decided to let the napping in a cot thing be as it's ruled my life for too many months so I now give in!!

She is also waking up in the night 50% of the time (between 2 and 4am) and can't get back to sleep without the buggy. This is a new thing, she has been a good sleeper at night for many months now. I'm praying it's teeth but no other signs..

Sorry, no helpful advice but it's been nice for me to vent!!

[crystal7]

Hmm maybe I should let her decide when to drop it and stop worryting that other toddlers are doing things differently! Maki, we still have night wakings sometimes but not sure if they're nap related? Can't really see a correlation...I might try the 11-1 but can't bear the thought of having to stay in until then- not even sure if E wil be tired without having been outside!

[kristymac1]

crystal7 Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

I might

> try the 11-1 but can't bear the thought of having

> to stay in until then- not even sure if E wil be

> tired without having been outside!

We were such early risers (still are for the most part....) that we still managed to get out and about most mornings - music class, baby gym, park, coffee and then home etc...

[Belle]

Starting to wonder if perhaps it's just the (annoying) case t hat some toddlers grow out of needing 2 hrs sleep sooner than others? Mine had just over an hour in one nap today - it's possible that he was overtired as didn't go down till 12.45, but though he woke screaming (never a well-rested sign) he recovered quickly and managed to then go till 7 bedtime no probs. Argh though - somehow one hour a day seems v v short! Also seems to have completely vetoed any buggy naps which makes days out a bit tricky.

[sunbob]

They are definately all individuals! My daughter had no day time naps for the first year, unless crashed out on top of me after a feed. I always tried to put her down but she never managed to sleep in the cot and was too excited by any trip outside to drop off in the buggy (very tiring). She then got more confident in the cot during the day and by about 13 months I was able to put her in her cot awake at 11am after a drink of milk and she would calmly go off to sleep for an hour. After settling in at nursery she became very flexible, can have her 1 hour nap at 11 as at home or after an early lunch as at nursery. The latest development is that she seems to be moving on to needing even less sleep, 1 time in 4 I will hear her on the monitor wide awake and singing in her cot instead of going to sleep and a couple of times at the nursery lately they told me that she didn't manage to get to sleep until 4pm or some ridiculous hour. Oh dear!