Three children aged 3 and under - how will we do it?!

[omagem]

I've got two kids - the eldest will be three soon and the youngest is 18months and we've just found out I'm pregnant again. It wasn't planned. We always wanted more children but ideally would have waited a bit longer. We're both feeling a bit overwhelmed with the news really and I wanted to ask - has anyone else been through this? How did you make it work? I'm just imagining complete chaos with three children at home (I'm a SAHM) and my family are over an hour away so we get very little help from anyone. It'll be alright though won't it?!

[Pickle]

Congratulations!

I've got three, but not quite such a small gap (5 years between first and third, but just under 17 months between the first two).

You will be fine. It will be busy, but in some ways having all three at home while your new baby is tiny makes things "easier", as you won't have to worry about school runs or being anywhere on time!

I managed with just the support of my partner, we have no family close by at all. In the blink of an eye they'll be off to school, so enjoy the time when they're all at home with you x

[Mariamadeit]

3 here too (6,4 almost 1) it is busy and our home is never tidy but it is fab, I can't really remember what it was like with just 2. They lay together beautifully and the little one is always watching the older two. If you haven't already got one, a sling is a must!

[Lesley1980]

My friend has 6 under 7! She has a lot of help from her father but just wow! It will be hard to begin with but I hunk routine is the key. I've got 5 but they're spread out from 18 years to a 16 month old. Although I often wonder how lovely it would be now if they were closer in age me and the hubby could go away together. I wish you the best of luck. And huge congratulation.

[etta166]

It will be fine. I have 3 close in age (4 years from oldest to youngest), and as everyone has said, the key is to be organised, calm and realistic. Also, you need your older children to be as independent and helpful as possible. Even if it takes longer in the short term, I really value the fact that my children are very independent now (my youngest is 3).

Good luck.

[sillywoman]

4 here. 3 was absolutely great, I really really enjoyed 3. We were in the same boat as you at the time (SAHM with no family support available & 3 under 3). I found I was kinder on myself, less stressed about the 'must do, must have' type of stuff that i did with the first, and to some extent with the second, and other folk were kinder too in an 'ohmugodthatpoorwomanwemusthelpher' kind of way. Loads of people round here seem to have 3, and usually fairly close. So you'll be joining a supportive club and you'll do just fine. 3 is great, so great we did it again (can't really recommend that, but that's another story).

[omagem]

Thank you all very much for your lovely messages, we're (well at least I am) feeling a lot more positive about everything. Like you say I guess we need to be a bit more realistic about what can be achieved with three at home and give the housework a miss every now and then. Lesley1980 your friend is amazing (or totally bonkers!) I can't even imagine how long it takes her to get 6 under 7 out the door! It takes me 30 mins just getting 2 toddlers out! Thanks again to you all! X

[devsdev]

Congratulations! I only have two but one thing I would go back and tell myself when my second was tiny is that there is NO need to get to playgroups etc. all the time! I made myself (and the kids) so stressed for about 2/3 months when I tried to get out the door for 9:30am playgroups. Thankfully I realised it was crazy and it was a lot more fun after that - we took things at a slower pace and only went to convenient playgroups.

Make your house super fun for the kids and set yourself up with friends who have similar aged kids and can come over to play. My sis-in-law has 5 aged 10 and under with a 6th on the way...it's chaos but it's very fun.

Good luck!

[notapoppet]

It will be fine, you can do it ! I have 4 but all far apart in age...I've been dealing with one teenager after another for 17 years and just embarking on the last teenage roller coaster..I have to say I'm a bit tired of it now.

Your teenage roller coaster will be a much shorter ride, You will be able to sit back and put your feet up and smile.

[Medusa]

When my children (triplets, now 15.5)were small I pared things down to the essentials. The house was not immaculately clean. Meals often included a jar of sauce and were certainly not all cooked from *organic* scratch. The children didn't have baths every night and nothing was ever ironed.

Because money was scarce, we had no access to paid activities beyond the odd session at soft play. Instead my house was set up pretty much along Montessori lines, as was the garden. Summers were spent in parks, having easy picnics and at the Peckham Rye One O'Clock Club. Winters we stayed at home more and did hours of painting, sticking, building train tracks and gradually amassing a vast collection of playmobil that kept them entertained for hours.

The things they missed out on were swimming (because of the child:adult ratio rules) and many out and about activities that would've involved tubes and trains. Too much stress with a gaggle of tiny children. They did plenty of that when they were older.

I wasn't huge on routine, but bedtime was sacrosanct, even on holiday. Otherwise there would have been murder most foul...

[louloulabelle]

Hi

I have 3 with almost identical gaps as yours. It's a challenge but as with everything in life you find a way that works for you. Logistics of getting 3 that age around on your own can be a challenge but depends how adventurous you are etc. I didnt go far in the first few months of no.3 arriving.

I learn't to make sure that no's 1 & 2 had something to occupy them when i needed to feed baby etc and somethings could only be achieved when hubby was around to help also. We have no outside support from family and couldnt afford babysitters so like Medusa our bedtime routine was quite strict - and still is as far as possible - and you do spend a lot of time doing laundry etc.

Ive tried to make sure toys and craft things are easily accessible so they can all access them without me always having to help and now they are at nursery/school age i try to prep as much the night before as possible such as school clothes and bags and lunch boxes etc.

We've never done the playgroup type things as most of the time they didnt suit all 3 ages groups so was best to make our own fun in the park or home in the garden.

Do batch cooking where possible so you've always got a bolognese sauce or the like in the freezer for quick meals and dont beat yourself up about trying to cook everything from scratch. sometimes toast and a yoghurt wont kill them for dinner!.

Most of all try to enjoy it. It is hard and even now mine are 3, 5 and 7 the challenges just change they dont go away but life gets a bit easier as they all become more independent and out of nappies and can feed themselves and all that and in my experience having them close in age is now much better as they like similar things. Be prepared though for everything being mostly geared up for a family of 4 not 5 and the expense of 3 of everything!!!

Good Luck xx

[Jules-and-Boo]

look at my friend's blog - "MummyTries.com"

Hard, yes - but she is a shining star of how hard it is but how to keep going and how to get on....

[omagem]

Thanks for everyone's messages, really appreciated! Now the whole idea has sunk in must say we are feeling less terrified and very excited for the future and the whole new level of chaos that awaits! X