Slummy Mummy confessions......

[helena handbasket]

Okay now Little Cook seriously gives me the creeps, riding around on that wooden spoon. It just looks wrong. Very wrong.

[Belle]

Yeah his hair looks weird and stuck-on too. Doesn't one of the cooks live in ED??

[ludoscotts]

loving this thread, below is the link to our little treasure and result of us not curbing our swearing. (I would like to add that this was the first time she swore and we did knock it on the head soon after this she now tells on Daddy if she hears him say a "naughty word")

[littleEDfamily]

I keep trying to go to bed, but the Family Room is making me laugh too much today.

And for the record, I once saw Little Cook (who is v tall) in Somerfields. He gave me the creeps, even without his wooden spoon (but I am sure is actually a very nice man - if you're reading Little Cook: love your work!)

[Pickle]

Fuschia, how dare you diss Mr Maker (6). He's my CeeBeeBee's crush, I think he's lovely. Justin, not so much. I have visions of romantic liasons with him involving him stopping every minute to show you how to sign...

Snowboarder, nothing wrong with Home and Away! I record it religiously, have got the omnibus Sky +'d for my return, and am watching it here in NZ (although frustratingly they are about 4 weeks behind the UK, so I'm only just seeing new episodes this week).

[Fuschia]

Pickle Wrote:

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>Justin,

> not so much. I have visions of romantic liasons

> with him involving him stopping every minute to

> show you how to sign...

You have to credit him with having very agile hands though, Pickle! Chortle

[Ruth_Baldock]

Oh god, swearing...it's such a norm here in the Baldock Crib (see what I did there?) that I didn't even THINK of it. Husband and I are always saying 'we MUST stop swearing...'. It's yet to happen. When I was in labor, I was shouting out all sorts of swear words (Well, obviously!) and the MW said 'Stop it! Do you want the first thing your baby hears when he enters the world is your foul language?'. Husband actually said to her 'Oooh, Matron!'. It was the highlight of a terrible, terrible labor!!!

Apart from that, errr when we run out of biccies, I'll normally break into Baby Baldock's stash of rusks- keenly bought for weaning a bit too early. Ahh, he'll never know. I've eaten a fair few of his chocolate desert things too (again, keenly bought waaaaaaaaaaay too early). When I'm bored, sometimes I make him model his hats for me and I take photos and send them to friends with 'amusing' catchphrases.

Have also definitely broken out the Gin to calm self and get him to sleep better too (am breastfeeding). Didn't work.

[Belle]

My gin consumption, never exactly low, has def soared in the last year too.

[Vickster]

I have taught my nearly two year old to sing the Jaws theme tune every time he sees a shark. It is very cute, but probably a bit wrong! Trouble is, he thinks all fish are sharks at the moment, so we do get a few weird looks going round the Horniman aquarium....

[Smiler]

I just don't get the Sportacus attraction. No no no.

Have just let my two-year-old sleep for almost the whole afternoon: she is still sleeping and it is tea-time. Know it'll be chaos tonight and in the night, but by then my husband will be home and I will deny all knowledge of why she is so lively and claim that I've had a "hard day" (catching up on American Trash on Sky+ and surfing the net) and make him take care of her / get up in the night (he doesn't have work tomorrow after all) while I scoff take-away / sleep!

Hurrah.

[jollybaby]

I don't know about slummy mummies but I am a very slummy mummy to be. I keep doing all the wrong things. I was useless with my folic acid tablets, I had 2 glasses of wine the other night and I haven't even thought about looking at the ingredients on my body moisturiser. Despite being measured for enormous sensible bras I keep squeezing myself into my pre pregnancy wired ones . . . . . . doesn't bode well for the future (though not sure I'll ever fancy mr Tumble!!)

[Ruth_Baldock]

Smiler Wrote:

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> I just don't get the Sportacus attraction. No no

> no.

>

> Have just let my two-year-old sleep for almost the

> whole afternoon: she is still sleeping and it is

> tea-time. Know it'll be chaos tonight and in the

> night, but by then my husband will be home and I

> will deny all knowledge of why she is so lively

> and claim that I've had a "hard day" (catching up

> on American Trash on Sky+ and surfing the net) and

> make him take care of her / get up in the night

> (he doesn't have work tomorrow after all) while I

> scoff take-away / sleep!

>

> Hurrah.

Smiler, this has made me laugh like a drain every time I read it. I've come back to re-read it about seven times! (It's been one of those afternoons where you just want to cry and put the baby on Ebay)

[helena handbasket]

Jollybaby it's okay, I kind of entered into parenthood kicking and screaming as well....... not that I didn't want to have a baby, I did, but at 30-something I had become quite self absorbed as you do and suddenly to have a long list if things you either CAN'T or MUST do didn't sit well.

Don't worry, motherhood will quickly zap that independent spirit! I think it took about, oh, a day after my son was born to realize that NOTHING was about me anymore. It's all good.

These are all great, thanks moms for making me laugh. We're all so worried about doing the right thing, and stressing about the things we KNOW are straight out of the Big Book of Bad Parenting that it's nice to know that we are all just doing the best we can under insane conditions. Smiler you are an evil genius (but have left my son to sleep all afternoon as well.....). But it makes me wonder....

Does parenthood make you and your partner a team? Or like my case, has self preservation divided you a bit? I've noticed we each seem to have a scoreboard in our heads, usually who "suffered most" this week and who will make it up to them.... some days I am so blown away by my performance as "the victim" I think I should get a role on CSI!

Please keep the laughter rolling......

[Ruth_Baldock]

Helena,

Hard to say. DH works stupid hours, by his own admission, and then will call me at 7pm to say 'Just leaving now...' only to roll in at 9pm, after saying 'Oh, as I was leaving so-and-so came by the office for a drink...'which leaves me REELING, so he knows I have it 'worse' and hasn't really tried to play the victim much in my son's 13 weeks of existence. However, he does sleep through Baby Baldock's night-time operas, and will accuse me of lying when I say 'He woke at 1.45, 3.15, 4 and 7' because he couldn't hear it!!!

I think parenthood has divided us slightly but he's good at doing what I want anyway- he reguarly tells his overbearing family to go take a hike when they come over, smirk and then tell me what I should be doing (this happens about three times a week- best was yesterday 'If he slept in his own cot, he wouldn't have got that bug you got- this is why co-sleeping is DANGEROUS'.

[Belle]

Actually both I think Helena - we're def a real team, sometimes v much in the face of adversity (ie our son) - but def do the score board too, and as during the weeks I do night-wakings and my husband gets up with the baby in the morning, often it's a bit of a competition of whether the night or the early start was worse. But i remember saying to my cousin that sometimes when your other half is around it's as if there's someone else there whose fault it might be when things go wrong (even if actually they had nothing to do with it) - poor guy!

[snowboarder]

I think we have gone from team to pretty divided. MrSB happily admits he could not do my job....but actually I think he would be better at it as is SO less emotional than me!

However am now making him crawl round the kitchen with baby as payment for my bad week.

[ryedalema]

Oh boy -I have soooo many slummy mummy confessions. I do the competitive 'worst day' stuff, the 'gin addiction' stuff...but the Lazy Town and Something Special guys? Eeewwwww no thanks!

Hasn't anyone mentioned the CBeebies presenters yet? Esp. the black guy and the Vernon Kay lookalike?

Yummmmm.

[Ruth_Baldock]

ryedalema Wrote:

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> Oh boy -I have soooo many slummy mummy

> confessions. I do the competitive 'worst day'

> stuff, the 'gin addiction' stuff...but the Lazy

> Town and Something Special guys? Eeewwwww no

> thanks!

>

> Hasn't anyone mentioned the CBeebies presenters

> yet? Esp. the black guy and the Vernon Kay

> lookalike?

>

> Yummmmm.

Don't know about them, but I used to teach Jacob Scipio who now presents Kerwhizz. He was a right little bastard. I say 'teach', he had small group lessons in the Learning Support dept. where I worked.

[sanity girl]

They're called Sid and Andy. Don't you love it when they do their number "raps" with accompanying "street" moves. Bless them.

ryedalema Wrote:

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>

>

> Hasn't anyone mentioned the CBeebies presenters

> yet? Esp. the black guy and the Vernon Kay

> lookalike?

>

> Yummmmm.

[Pickle]

The number raps are hilarious, I love the slightly sheepish looks they both have on their faces while they do them (I bet their friends hassle them about it in the pub!).

[The Nappy Lady]

I love the Sid and Andy Number Rap, it is hilarious, love the idea of them getting teased about it at the pub.

Re the 'team' thing, I think in reality my hubby and I make a great team, but somehow we quite often manage to appear to fall out in the process of actually dealing with stuff pretty well. I guess it is often just that we are both tired and a bit stressed and we have got better at recognising this and not letting it turn into a major row.

I think the jump from 1 to 2 children is much harder than the jump from 0 to 1, because suddenly there really isn't any respite from parenting, but then again maybe it is just that the early days with number 1 have faded after 5 long years!

I sometimes feel he is harder on the children than I would be, so have to bite my lip and I'm not always good at that. In the long term I can see he's right, but in the moment I can find it hard not to 'jump in' if that makes sense. It doesn't help that we are both pretty stubborn, strong characters by nature and have children who have (surprise surprise) taken after us, so they don't take no for an answer easily either.

Molly

[helena handbasket]

Sid (or is he Andy?) is from Peckham. Read a nice interview about him somewhere.

[Pecanpie]

helena handbasket Wrote:

> Does parenthood make you and your partner a team?

> Or like my case, has self preservation divided you

> a bit?

When our first was three weeks old we realised we were turning on each other and the words of Pheobie from Friends rung round our heads, 'thats what they want you to do'. Many years on we are a good team, but it took a LONG time!

Ps Sid and Andy, mummy eyecandy, no brainer! Mr Tumble however, no no no!

[Sanne Panne]

The Nappy Lady Wrote:

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> I love the Sid and Andy Number Rap,

Yummmm I love Sid in the number rap. Andy, bit of a kiddo. But Sid, yeah! Sportacus has an ok body but he's the coproducer of Lazytown so he's not just an innocent actor-victim and that's enough to turn me off. Justin gives me the creeps although his programmes are really good.

Otherwise I'm not prejudiced at all.

As for non-tv confessions... I give my 20mo a small piece of my toast with Nutella a couple of times a week but there's only a hint of Nutella on it for her because I will have licked the rest off to keep her from getting chocolate all over her face (and to make sure I get enough Nutella). That's your anti sugar, hygiene obsessed mum from a year ago.

[hpsaucey]

Anyone talked about DH crushes??? A few friends say their other halves really fancy Sarah Jane. URGH!!! My other half goes for the Milkshake girls every time - more 'real and earthy' apparently.

Mister Makes looks like he'd be a laugh. Or what about that guy from Doodle Do - bet he'd be good fun for a few pints down the pub at least!