Cost of starting family in ED/Peckham

[tomchance]

My partner and I have started to talk about the practicalities of having a kiddo, and obviously one of our main concerns is money.

We currently rent quite comfortably off our combined income (roughly ?60k), but if we dropped down to just my income (around ?30k) we'd really struggle. We've looked at a few shared ownership schemes in the area and it seems the minimum household income they want is around ?35k, which is above mine. I've looked briefly into child benefit and local housing allowance, which it seems we could potentially get help from if we kept renting but I'm not sure I'd have enough left to save anything.

Can anyone offer some basic advice, like childcare costs vs. staying at home and getting a mortgage or paying rent without relying on our present income & low outgoing requirements?

[Fuschia]

You might be able to get child tax credit

[Fuschia]

Good site: http://www.entitledto.co.uk/Default.aspx?AspxAutoDetectCookieSupport=1

[ratty]

If you take a decision on having a baby based around being able to afford it then the population would soon dwindle. The simple answer is that your life will change and your expenditure will go on different things, you will come up with ways of saving / earning money that you never before thought of.

For most people having a baby is a struggle financially - this, in my opinion is part of the fun.

We were in a similar position to yourselves back in 2007 when we started planning our first one. My wife got pregnant and we tightened the belt from that very minute, saving as much cash as we could for the first year. We were managing to tuck aside nearly ?1k a month from our combined salaries, so that when my wife stopped working and Maternity Pay stopped we had a good few of grand to see us through (even after buying all the things baby needed brand new (yes, even a bugaboo). This allowed her to stay off work for 18 months. My boy then started nursery when he was 16 months old, my wife went back to work 3 days a week and I now compress my working hours into 4 days meaning we save a day on nursery.

It's not nearly as tough financially as you think it will be! Good luck! You will find a way to do it!

[Bobbaz]

It's a tough one as having a baby does cost but there's always ways round things and your lifestyle will change dramatically anyway once the baby arrives. Your number 1 cost without a shadow of doubt are childcare costs, the things you need to factor in are do you have support from your family/friends or are you going to have to pay for a childminder/nursery/nanny? It is possible for you to return to work relatively quickly after the birth maybe on a part-time basis to add a little to your income? Childcare costs will vary dramatically dependent upon the option you go for a Nanny is wonderful but they aren't cheap and you'd have to earn over ?30k I would say to justify this option but childminders/nurseries can cost much less.

The forum is fab for buying 2nd hand (or sometimes free) baby items and certainly your lifestyle changing meant for us we saved a fortune in going-out partying costs!

I didn't find that 1st year overly expensive in all honesty, it's when you get into school fees, clubs, big presents that the costs start mounting up. The 1st year tends to be your initial lay out for nursery/pram etc and nappies - not too painful.

Anyway good luck with starting your new family!

[linzkg]

We recently bought a comfortable house followed by the birth of our baby - based on 2 city salaries - we had budgeted everything and had it all mapped out .. I was made redundant 5 weeks before our son was born .. so there went that idea! He's almost 8 months old and I'm still home - though even stat maternity pay is soon to run out but I do have a few other ideas to bring in money - but in the meantime we're making it work - you'll be suprised that you CAN make it happen somehow - there are things you possibly 'wasted' your money on that you cut out without even knowing it.

Point being - you can plan to your hearts content but things can change over night.

Good on you for being responsible and it can be stressful trying to put everything in place - but remember the fun in a baby and also the unknown and the future.

All the best!

[The Nappy Lady]

Just to second Bobbaz,

I know it can be hard to resist buying all new stuff for your first baby, but in all honestly 2nd hand newborn stuff is often hardly used (sometimes not at all if baby is bigger than expected at birth, or too many clothes purchased etc). Do make the most of the classified section and Freecycle too and you can avoid spending the ?1,000's that some do on equipment.

Cloth nappies will save you a fortune too (of course I have to mention this being The Nappy Lady)!! ?1,000 roughly per child on disposables, or say ?250 on cloth nappies and use them on the next child too (can sometimes pick nappies up on the forum in as new condition to from those who try but don't end up using them). Oh and use washable wipes too - ?7.50 over 3 years instead of about ?400 on wet wipes!!!! Southwark Council will give you a ?40 voucher towards the cost of the nappies to help you get started, and I can help and advise on which ones are best suited to your needs.

I think it is a really scary thing considering the change that comes with having a family, but you do manage one way or another. I had a yoga teacher who once said "Every baby comes with its own purse" meaning you often find new means of income as a result of having a baby, and it is so true.

Good luck with it.

Molly

x

[Smiler]

How exciting!

Childcare is the biggest expense after rent or mortgage - nursery is ?55 - ?60 a day (ours is ?750 a month for 3 days a week), think childminder costs fairly similar and nannies or even nanny shares much more expensive. Although I still think is economically a good idea to return to work as will have more money, even though most of salary goes on childcare for a few years.

We have saved by staying in our 2-bed flat rather than moving to a bigger place. It may be cheaper to continue renting rather than buying - and if you buy and want to stay there for a few years, school catchment areas become an issue, whereas renting is more flexible.

As others have said, baby stuff can be acquired for not a lot, especially in ED!

[sillywoman]

No, you're probably right - the wouldn't be anything left to save anything with. But it seems to be a question of weighing it all in the balance for you, what will be more important to you over the term of your life, a family, or a wodge in the bank?

I am biased though, we were in your position & chose a family, now 14 years on we've got 4 beautiful children and not a bean in the bank, quite literally. It's scary, but to us they were worth it (most of the time!).

Only you can decide, but there's rarely a 'right time' to have kids. 'Go for it' I'd say.

[sophiesofa]

Hello I would just like to say thanks for starting this thread tom and to all who have replied it's been really eye opening. I'm not planning a baby yet but am thinking about going freelance so have been trying to work out if i'll be kicking myself in x amount of years when I want to start a family and don't get maternity leave etc. but it seems where there's a will there's a way! Thanks again x

[The Nappy Lady]

Sophiesofa,

I was self emplyed when I had DD2 and as long as you pay you NI etc you get Maternity Allowance from the government based on a 12 week period of income in the run up to your baby's arrival.

I was a nice surprise!! So not as bad as you are thinking maybe?

Molly

x

[emilydrab]

i remember thinking just the same as you just before we started out family. There never seemed much money to spare and couldn't imagine how it could possibly work out! But it's amazing that it just does - as long as you can cover your mortgage/rent then it's astonishing just how little you can live off! I do my weekly shop at Lidl and on peckham market - this is a great area to live off very little and most people you see on Peckham high street are doing just that - probably on the minimum wage as well rather than 30K. Very few couples do go down to purely one income and once your baby gets to a certain age you'll probably both want to work again (for most people that's around one year's old for a few that's school age). Also don't forget you won't be able to go out any more - that saves a lot of money. You just need to avoid those lovely tempting baby shops on Lordship lane and get yourself down to St Christopher's Hospice to buy them second hand. I've never been particulary materialistic but having kids has made me realise that the pleasure of spending money and having nice things is pretty crappy compared to the pleasure in watching your kids grow and having fun with them! My advice it - just get on with it!

[Monkey]

I worried for years about the financial side of having a baby. In the end we just did it and it's working out fine. I have returned to work after four months and a bit and my daughter is at the Excel Centre on Forest Hill Road and absolutely loves it there. It costs GBP750 a month for a baby and we have childcare vouchers so I say we really pay about GBP600 a month.

Hope this helps a bit. Also would say you don't need to spend much on baby clothes - just go to the NCT sales in Dulwich Village. Very posh clothes, some never worn. You can also get the cot, Moses basket and pushchair from there.

Hope it helps!

[tomchance]

Thank you so much for all of your very kind, generous thoughts! What lovely people.

We've kitted most of our flat out with freecycle and junk shops, I don't think we'll have a problem with the materialism part. It's very reassuring to see lots of people in a similar situation making the most of life.

We'll just have to upgrade our flat budget spreadsheet if the time comes :)

[sophiesofa]

Thanks Molly I didn't know that - that makes a huge difference!