EDZ

We had an Ikea kitchen in our old house. We didn't install it, but when we left five years later (and seven years after it was installed) it still looked great. Only thing was the taps. Might be worth an upgrade on those. Thinking of putting one in our new house!

You can get a cheaper and bigger houses by going not very far. West Norwood, West Dulwich and Syndenham would be top of my list. ED is lovely but the houses are small and expensive.

GOing rate is net ?10hr and up to ?12+ net if they are in a nanny share with three or more children.

I think it helps to make sure they have basic skills, especially able to hold a pen correctly, use scissors, know numbers and letters etc.

I just want to recommend our furniture maker, Richard Jennings-Bramly. He did a fabulous job and this is the second house we have used him in so he is consistently good. He built us lots of bookshelves, alcove shelves and wardrobe. Attached are pictures of what he just built. They look amazing and we got three quotes and he was not the most expensive. He is also really good with design ideas. www.bramly.co.uk

I did Thailand twice and Cambodia with toddlers and babies. Admitedly we were staying pretty high-end, but as travelling goes its easy. The Thai's LOVE children. Our eldest (4 years) got badly bitten by mosquitoes and her face got all swollen. We went to a pharmacist and they prescribed anti-hystamines and in a day all the swelling went down. I found my children enjoyed the North more than the south. It was cooler and the ocean was not really there thing strangelly. If you go bring mosquito nets. But they really do have lots of stuff you can get there. Nappies are no problem to get. If you are in Bangkok you can stock up on anything you might need (they have Boots).

Its a good central location, but I think that road is about 80% flats. A number of which are counsel flats. Lived around the corner for 5 years and used to walk the road every day. There was a lovely drug dealer on it for a while....

We live close to Goose Greene and the noise is really bad. We can hardly enjoy our garden. We are moving. After 4 years we are still not used to it and it is driving us nuts. Its no way to live. We are moving further south and west into forest hill. We will still get planes but not the constant line of planes over our head. When I moved in I was shocked and in tears about the noise. I phoned Heathrow pointing out I lived 19 miles from the airport. I did not expect that. Woman looked up my address and said three flight paths converge at the top of goose greene. Joy....

We are also moving thinking of moving to the road. We have young children. We are a bit concerned with the traffic. It seemed reasonably heavy at rush hour. What time does it calm down?

Time out. Consistently and repeatedly as soon as they start to say no, throw something,don't listen etc. 1 minute when they are one, two minutes when they are 2. When they are little you have to stay near and make sure they don't move. They have to not move for the time allotted. so if they get off the step they need to start over. It doesn't work if they start the tantrum so you need to do it as soon as they are not listening. It also has to be very consistent and you have to not lose temper. In a few weeks they will get the picture, if you are very consistent

Time out. Consistently and repeatedly as soon as they start to say no, throw something,don't listen etc. 1 minute when they are one, two minutes when they are 2. When they are little you have to stay near and make sure they don't move. They have to not move for the time allotted. so if they get off the step they need to start over. It doesn't if they start the tantrum so you need to do it as soon as they are not listening. It also has to be very consistent and you have to not lose temper. But a few weeks and they will get the picture, if you are very consistent

We flying to Canada with a toddler and newborn. I want to take our P&T, but was wondering if anyone knows if we can take it right to the gate (or a similar large non umbrella type buggy). We are flying BA so will be in terminal 5. It will be our toddler's nap time while in airport and do not fancy having no buggy for three hours at the airport. Thanks

Why should anyone who can afford things like owning a TV, going out for a coffee daily, multiple pairs of shoes or car in the city get money from the government? I am not from this country and I find the sense of entitlement is astonishing. The government should be there to protect and support the most needy. People will be able to cope with the reduction in income by consuming less and buying less expensive options. It's not a disaster. Other societies have faced much worse! Let us all remember where this money comes from which we receive every month. From our own pocket. And frankly looking at how much the government feels entitled to take I would rather that it simply left more in my pocket!

I used an arm chair. I recommend this one, http://www.maisonsdumonde.com/UK/en/produits/fiche/armchair-cottage-50140296.htm It has a pretty small footprint and the farbic is washable. I tried a glider chair and didn't think the ricking motion was all that great. Any comfy arm chair will do, but it needs to have a full back (so you can rest your head back and have support for your shoulders) and arms at the side to give you support.

Find the nanny share first if you are going that route (and I recommend it both for cost and the benefit to your child of having another child to interact with). Finding the right nanny share is harder and then you can start looking for a nanny together. I think I started looking 3 months before I went back to work.

I use a fan in my daughter's room to blunt the sound of the planes (and in my rooms sometimes). They drive me nuts and you will see lots of rants from me on this sire. Why they have to fly so low is beyond me!

I will join. Mother-in-law is visiting so good excuse to vacate the house :)

I would love to join. Am due around that time so might not be able to make it, but otherwise would love to join.

I would love to meet. I also work full time, but live pretty close to LL so if my husband gets home at a reasonable hour could meet up in evening and could also do a Sunday.

17 Oct, second one and its pink

What does one do at night? I assume you keep them in nappy's but for how long? Do you just stop using nappys when you notice the nappy stays dry or when when they are old enough to get out of bed and go to the loo?

It is nice to see a study like this. I work full time and decently long hours. I really love my job. I also love my daughter but I can honestly say I know for sure I would be an awful stay at home mum. I often dream about working part-time, but the dream usually involves me having time to myself and not necessarily more time with my daughter. The fact is I just get bored doing all the "activities" day after day, hour after hour. Also, I get a huge satisfaction about being financially independent. I think the study in the article was right to consider the benefits the mother gets out of working and how that can positively impact the child, the marriage etc. I know the balance of my marriage would suffer if my husband had to be the sole earner. I know my self-esteem would suffer. It would create financial pressure that we don't need. But people do look at me sometimes when I say I work full time and that I am happy with the choice. I often get looks of sympathy...which I find bizare as I am a highly trained and paid professional who enjoys the work (and the rewards!). But I can really see the struggle of the choice particularly if you are not able to financially jurstify the high cost of excellent childcare. I have an amazing nanny and without seeing my daughter's squeels of delight when nanny comes through the door and witnessing the long list of activities they get up to during the day (way more than I could have the patience for!) I know I would not be so comfortable with how I have chosen to do things.

Does anyone know if a Phil & Teds fits in the boot of a Golf? Going to buy one, but just want to make sure! Thanks

I went to a single sex school and loved it. Yes, there was a period of extraordinary bitching around the age of 13-14, but after that it calmed down. What I liked was that we were always so relaxed around each other in the class-room. Lying on the floor with legs sprawled out during break, not self-conscious during gym. We mixed a lot with the boys schools so I don't think anyone got too socially deprived of male company. Academically we were defenitly told to over and over to achieve and that being a girl did not mean we should preclude ourselves from any career. However, more than anything it is the school itself which is important. I would rather send my daughter to an excellent mixed school than an ok single sex school.

ok, I am going to get some flack for this, but my solution (and this was only once she was past 6 months and I knew she was not hungry because she would wake up in the morning not hungry) was to get up and turn the fan on and go back to bed. However, she had different cries and sometimes she would be crying hysterically for 10 minutes and then I knew I had to get up and settle her. But otherwise it would be this low winge or a very sudden and hysterical cry that lasted less than 5 minutes (I used to run to these until I realised a few times when I wasn't fast enough that she stopped just as I got to her door, so afterwards I always waited to see if she would drop off). After a few weeks of the "fan" or my ignoring her she learnt to settle herself pretty quickly. For some reason the white noise of the fan brought my stress level down (I couldn't just stay outside her door listening to her cry), but the fan and lying half awake to see if she was still crying seemed to work for both of us. But honestly every baby is different and every parent is differnt. The good news is that it doesn't last for ever.