reren

You are entitled to take time off for nct from work and I would highly recommend doing the long course run by tess. The best thing about doing the course over a 4 week period is that it gives you much more time to get to know the other couples. I've just had my baby and it is a godsend to have a group of mums and dads going through exactly the same things. I didn't realise quite how tough the first week or so after birth would be (the physical recovery was tougher than expected and emotionally more of a rollercoaster) and having other people to email/ see soon afterwards who were all experiencing the sme things was really helpful.

My 9 day old baby has bright orange poo and seems to be getting a bit windy. I'm worried some of the medication they've given me after a difficult birth could affect him(I'm breast-feeding exclusively and he is a really good feeder). He has been feeding all the time which the midwife says is quite normal but the poo is a v strange colour?? I'm taking a strong iron supplement is there anyway that could make him constipated?

Just wanted to say that I think its probably very easy for people to give advice along the lines of - 'just ask, you can't expect people to notice' - but until you've actually been in the situation, feeling somewhat vulnerable and knackererd - you'd be surprised how little you feel like tapping a stranger on the head and demanding their seat.

I wonder if anyone has any advice about which baby monitor to buy - I'm completely overwhelmed by the options! They seem to vary a lot in price and I'm wondering what is worth spending - and what features people have found particularly useful? A friend suggested that the video camera ones are actually a bad idea since you run the risk of being able to do nothing but sit and watch your sleeping baby in a freaked out kind of way - and if you just have the option of listening to them its much better? Any thoughts??

Has anyone else noticed that upmystreet seems to have Goose Green Primary School in the wrong place? I may just be being v thick - but it seems to think its just off/ on Underhill Road? I don't think that can be right? http://www.upmystreet.com/local/schools/goose-green-primary-school-5063.html Sorry - don't mean to take this thread off topic!

Can someone remind me how you work out most accurately the distance from your house to your nearest school?

That is reassuring thank you! We have about 6 weeks until our son is due so I was wondering if I should change before he arrives. If people have had a good experience w the gardens who have kids then I'll probably stay w them - I may well have just had a bad experience in terms of th individual doctors I've seen.

I wondered if anyone had any advice about gp surgeries that have been really good locally for new-borns and young children? Currently w the gardens and I'm not crazy about either gp I've seen - and I don't get the feeling they'd be great we young kids. I also wonder if some practices have better ways of handling appointments than others? Don't really know what you look for as a new parent but i imagine you spend a lot of time at the gps so having one you like is important?

Anyone on this post starting nct classes next week w tess in east dulwich?

I will also try and come along - due on the 16th Oct!

16 October - and a boy

Sounds like a really good idea - I shall pass on the tip!

I just read a few of the recent posts regarding trying to get babies/ toddlers to sleep. We are expecting a bundle of joy/terror in about 8 weeks time. I know there's no avoiding being massively sleep deprived for months (at least)but I wondered what tips people had / if you had it to do over again from the time the baby was born - what would you do this time round to try & get your baby to sleep? Our current plan is that we'd have the baby in a moses basket in the bedroom for the first few months - transferring him at some point to his own bedroom when we feel the time is right. Going to try hard not to nurse to sleep (but is this impossible with a newborn??) - as I've noticed all my friends who've done this are still up multiple times in the night (I also wonder if this is actually a bit of a chicken and egg thing - if you've got a baby that has trouble sleeping is nursing them to sleep inevitable - i.e. its not the nursing to sleep that is actually the problem) My inclination is not to follow a really strict routine - but work out our own routine and then stick to that - but again - I have no experience of any of this - would be really interested in what you have found works well? And whether there's anyway to establish a routine with a newborn - or is that something that needs to wait until 3 months +?

Fiona - my brother is having real trouble with his toddler biting - how do you use steiner dolls? I looked them up online and saw a few examples - could you use any doll or is there something specific about the steiner dolls - and how you 'use' them?

We just did an intensive John Lewis session :-) and found it really useful. They give good impartial advice and you get a lot of information about the different alternatives. We still haven't actually bought one - but we're leaning towards the bugaboo bee We found that the crucial difference between brands came down to whether the baby could face you, weight and ease of folding - both elements that (I think) will make all the difference getting on and off public transport. We came to the conclusion that if you were mainly pushing it around town and occasionally loading it in and out of a car then paying the extra for the bugaboo wasn't necessarily worthwhile - but if you'll be doing a lot of getting on and off buses/ trains then the bugaboo might just be worth paying the exorbitant sum you have to pay for it! Don't know if others with experience would agree?

Saila - had you paid anything? The place we went to see asks for an application and a small deposit to hold your name on the waiting list - I assume this secures your place? In terms of au pairs not being able to take care of babies - who sets those rules? I was an au pair for a 4 month old and it was a great experience?

Sorry - i know there are millions of threads about nursery - seems to confuse people other than me! I am due in October and we are planning to be able to share the childcare between us until he is 1 which would take us to October 2011. After that point - I will be back at work and we are thinking about an aupair/ nanny share from 1-2. After age 2, we'd like to put him in a nursery and went today to see the Mothergoose Nursery on Uplands road which seemed really nice. so - we definitely need to try & secure a place from about Sept 2012 - do you think we'd be safe just signing up for 1 nursery given that this is still a long way away - or would you recommend putting your name down and a few places just in case? Also - I'm wondering if we should also try & put our names on a waiting list for sometime around January 2012 just in case the idea of a nanny share/ au pair doesn't work out? Any advice?

This is a bit of a weird one - and possibly an old wives tale - i certainly can't vouch for its success - but my husband's grandmother swears by cleaning the kitchen floor! I thought it was completely old wives tale-ish but my anti-natal yoga teacher was advising someone else in my class that crawling and wiggling your bottom back and forth and moving your arms in a cleaning the floor kind of motion is a great thing for getting the baby into the right position and getting things moving! My husbands grandmother (who obviously used this many years before anti-natal yoga was common in the uk!) swears it got all the births in her family on track! You are probably inundated with similarly bizarre ideas - so apologies if this is completely unhelpful - but just in case its useful I thought i'd pass it on!

My brother has a gorgeous little 2 and half year old - who has always had a bit of a thing about biting. My brother at the end of his tether and I wondered if anyone had been successful in getting their child to stop biting? My nephew seems to bite in a number of different situations - when he's a bit tired and grumpy but also when he's really happy and excited - it seems to be a reaction to very strong emotions - either positive or negative...he also does a bit of pinching. Otherwise he's happy and well adjusted - good at making friends, very friendly and communicative. He's talking a lot and can often verbalise that he wants to bite rather than going ahead and biting - but he is an only child so far, so not brilliant at sharing yet... Any brilliant pieces of advice! Gratefully received!

My cousin just told me something really fascinating about toddlers - that I thought people might find helpful who are worrying about them refusing to eat healthy foods - apparently toddlers go through a (long) phase of only accepting foods that are very bland and that they are familiar with because in earlier times as your toddler began to be independent of you, the last thing you wanted was to have him putting new things in his mouth all the time. Basically the childs body assumes that the parent isn't keeping as close an eye on him and and therefore the child errs towards safe food like bread and pasta - rather than experimenting with crazy things like vegetables. Add to that the inevitable power play that food brings to the equation and you have a child that never eats anything healthy. Don't know if its scientifically proven - but made me think that when mine gets to be a toddler it'll be helpful to know this when I'm worrying about why he's living on 2 raisins a day or whatever!

God I love the east dulwich forum! Lawrence's post has just made me chortle so loudly that everyone in the office is now staring at me! Brilliant stuff.

Oooh - the fact that he's complained about the interview just sums him up. Very happy to dish out criticism and completely unable to cope when under fire himself. I don't see what he could possibly complain to the BBC Trust about except when Jenni Murray asks him specifically how much time he's spent alone with 18 month olds. Completely fair question and one he gives a pretty vague answer to - what does a 'period of weeks' mean? Surely one could stick out practically any child-rearing approach for a few weeks!

Thank you very much all - your stories are all brilliant! As I stood on the tube this morning with no one offering their seat I too was struck by the irony of suddenly the 'huge' bump becoming invisible! Also I have to apologise to my husband he read my post and was hurt that I'd implied he hadn't been supportive - he's always telling me how nice I look, so really don't have anything to complain about on that front! Didn't realise he'd sussed my pseudonym - damn! I loved all the mother and mother-in-law stories too - you'd think having been through it themselves they'd be a little more sensitive! Anyway - am loving all your stories! It is a very weird thing to have your body not only changing so much - but it being something people seem to feel is public property - but no doubt it is all worth it in the end! I'm just glad I don't live in Italy anymore - when I did live there for a short period - it was amazing how often little old ladies would come up and tell me my shoes weren't appropriate for my outfit or some other comment on my appearance. Can't imagine what its like being pregnant and living in a country where people aren't famed for their reserve like they supposedly are here!

ha ha - i just listened to the BBC radio piece gwod posted - very pleasing to see him brought down a peg or two. Its the absolute certainty with which he pronounces on things that gets on my nerves. He has some very weird views about mental illness as well and he seems to see that as completely down to nurture! Does he have children of his own I wonder? Or is he just speaking from the personal experience of being f***d up?

I knew the east dulwich forum would make me feel better! Told my husband and he just got cross with the taxi driver :-) I think maybe Helen GV is right - this is his shtick every time he picks up someone with a bump he hopes to get a rise out of them. In which case maybe the way i dealt with it disappointed him - smiling inanely and then ignoring. So am feeling passive but not quite so annoyed with myself.