Ligaturiosity

That is your opinion Hbasket, and you are entitled to it, as I am entitled to mine.

Missus, How do you know that this woman wasn't from Peckham?????? She may well have been!

Chatelle, nobody is saying all 'Nigerians are child abusers'. Why do you have to totally twist what was said?

"super bit of trolling" is pretty nasty Keef. What do you mean I am trolling? Belllenden Belle, just because something is 'legal' does not mean it is right. Many illegal things which we now find abhorrent were once legal. I have been advised to go to Peckham and have a go at the women down there. What is that supposed to mean? Are you making this an ethnic or social thing? Why suggest Peckham???? How do you know what ethnicity/social background etc this woman was? Are you assuming that the woman in question was some genteel, organic eating so and so swanning down L/ship Lane having (to quote Keef) a 'cheeky puff'? Nothing could be further from the truth. I have rarely said anything like this to anyone before. This woman and her friend were twice my size and looked quite Vicky Pollard-esque. They could easily have retaliated if they'd wanted to, but evidently could not defend the indefensible. Sean M, no I am not remorseful. I regret the phraseology of my initial posting as actually I didn't really 'let loose' as that can be construed as being totally maniacal which I wasn't. Re. Heidi's points. I work with a Nigerian woman who is quite open that she batters her children when they are naughty. I have told her that I do not agree with it at all.

I have not stopped posting. What are you talking about trolling? I am not sure why you feel the need to be so incredibly nasty. I think your postings have been amongst the loftiest and most unpleasant. I don't mind you disagreeing with my original points but why the need to be so incredibly mocking and spiteful? Do you think that your latter points are constructive and to do with the debate?

I said it Townley. I should rephrase it that there are ample private secondary schools compared to state secondaries...and yes although it is a totally different argument I do think private schools should be abolished. It seems to me that many are against this Harris Academy opening, and although I do not entirely agree with the way Harris runs things, his academies have really raised standards. I hope that the academy is a success.

Thank you Heidi. Unfortunately many people have had to PM me in support of what I said, as they are too afraid of getting shot down if they say anything on this forum. That is a real shame to be honest. I totally take on board those people who have said they don't think it was my place to say anything to the woman. I respect their right to opinionate. However, the vitriol and personal attacks on my character - (er, hello this is an internet forum, do you know me....? And yes many of you do and have asked me for my username when you've met me...haven't given it...I wonder why). Can I just say that those of you who choose to say things like 'she might have been coming off heroin'. Oh please. And 'cheeky puff' eh 'Keef'? Well you smoke don't you so are hardly going to agree with me. Good for you.

Actually Lawrence, my husband doesn't think I behaved badly. Far from it. He believes I shouldn't have said anything as he thinks I could have put MYSELF at risk. And you call me rude....what an ironic comment in light of what you have had to say about me. I did not say what I did to that woman because I am a busy body, but because what she was doing was plain wrong. Of course it is wrong if she does it at home as well, but doing it publically when all the evidence shows how damaging it can be for a growing foetus is appalling. I said what I did because I feel it is totally selfish to smoke while pregnant, and to do it publically is suggesting you really don't give a sh@t about your unborn child. Because if you did, you wouldn't. You can lay into me as much as you like, I stand by what I did, but respect your opinion that you beg to differ. That's fine. I am not here expecting everyone to agree with me.

She was actually with a 'big burly' tattooed female! If she had been with a man I would still have said the same thing. Is it verbal abuse telling someone it is shocking to see them smoking while pregnant? I don't think it is. But then I wouldn't, would I? I have not claimed to be 'perfect' and when I am criticised constructively as we all are on occasions, I take it on the chin.

How do you know I don't like the way it turned out? Yes I did ask for people's opinions and expected that not everyone would agree with me. I do happen to have an inkling about how people are likely to respond on here you know, even though I haven't posted in ages. However, just find it amusing to be referred to in such vitriolic terms such as psycho etc. Hilarious!! :) I think you should reserve such judgements for the people who murder and stab - and there are a few who have a penchant for such activities round here.

Thanks to those who have given a reasoned response to my original posting. It would seem I had murdered someone the anger some are showing towards me. I didn't 'attack' this woman or act aggressively. I merely said that I was shocked and appalled by seeing her smoking and pregnant. It's true I felt both those things. I really don't care if people say it wasn't my place to say anything. Maybe it wasn't, but I did and I don't regret it. I love babies and think they owe it to us to give them the best start in life. It makes my blood boil that some people can be so selfish for just 9 months. Call me judgemental? Ha! I am indeed. But aren't we all? Quite so.

Gigigrl, when did I say that I 'attacked' the woman in question. Heidi is right to say that some of the postings are childish, and in my opinion offensive. Peckhamboy, why do you feel the need to use the anaology of 'organic' goats cheese and smoking cigarettes while pregnant? How do you know that the woman in question only smoked a couple of cigarettes? You are not definitely going to get listeria by eating goats cheese, but smoking meanwhile is definitely harmful to the foetus. I don't give a sh@t what the woman does when not pregnant, but when it is going directly to the unborn child it is wrong. As I said, there is no way it should be done so publically. Heidi is right that the woman in question left herself open to criticism by brazenly smoking while so heavily pregnant - and no, she wasn't fat definitely pregnant.

'Dorothy', got to laugh. A wind up surely? And I behaved badly? Pot. Kettle. Black. Chantelle, if you were relatively fit to begin with then jogging would be fine. I work as an exercise instructor in addition to my regular job, and there is nothing wrong with exercising whilst pregnant. I am not sure how you can equate that with smoking cigarettes whilst pregnant. I exercised whilst pregnant with my children as well.

There are overwhelmingly more private secondary schools in the area compared to state schools which is awkward for those of us who cannot afford, and do not believe in, private education. Why do you ask???

I am sorry if I am coming in on a tangent here, but whether residents like it or not (and I only live 5 minutes away from this new academy), the area definitely needs a new boys state secondary school. I used to be a teacher at one of the Harris Academies, and it was quite the vilest place I have ever worked (as a teacher). I won't go into the ins and outs of how I feel about the mixing business principles with education and staff disquiet etc etc. but despite very high staff turnover rates, and promoting people at a very young age in order to retain them, the academies DO raise standards. Dramatically in some cases. These academies tend to have high percentages of children from disadvantaged backgrounds, and as has been said, before they were academies they tended to be sink schools. Results and performance have been raised in almost all the schools since they became academies. I think the ED Girls Academy when it was Waverley had something like 30% pass rate at GCSE and it is now over 50%. No mean feat when one considers that the intake is pretty much the same as it was then. There are too many private schools in the area, and not enough decent state schools. Although I did not enjoy being a teacher at one of the Harris Academies, I would consider sending my children to one, as the results and behavious management were excellent - even if the staff retention was not!

"I may not like the idea of a pregnant woman smoking but I will defend to the death her right to do it. " "I was born in the 60s and my mother smoked throughout her pregnancies. We were all born healthy." Oh right. So that's OK then. Sigh.

Plimsoul, you are right to put the 'attack' in inverted commas, as I did not 'attack' the woman at all. My points were made firmly and eloquently, because I DO care and perhaps in saying something it may make her realise that she should stop (smoking). In remaining silent, which everyone so far has said they would have done, aren't we condoning what she is doing? A baby in the womb gets everything from its mother, and smoking not only exposes the foetus to toxins in tobacco smoke, but it also damages placental function. This can cause the foetal heart rate to rise as baby struggles to get enough oxygen. To be pregnant and continue to smoke is awful, and I feel very sorry for the child.

I hope said person wasn't led ashtray Indiana. Thank you for understanding my anger. Perhaps I should have kept schtum but I was so shocked I couldn't help myself. Incidentally, I am sure that this pregnant woman was well aware of what she was doing yesterday and in this day and age had to realise that she would get some filthy looks and negative comments.

Well we are all different. I did not expect everyone to agree with me, even my husband didn't. However, I am surprised that I am getting it on here by all and sundry! I will continue to be opinionated nonetheless as I personally think it is wrong to do something like that, let alone so publically.

True it is not my place to tell her what to do, and I did not 'tell her what to do'. I expressed my negative opinion on what she was doing. Monkey "I would also add that berating a heavily pregnant woman on the street is really quite insensitive". I think it is more insensitive to be chuffing away on thousands of toxic chemicals knowing the dangers it causes, to an innocent unborn child.

No I am not Goodliz. I am still really taken about by this. I hardly ever see it these days, thanks God. My husband and I were talking about it in bed 'til quite late last night. I can't help but feel really strongly about it. If she is going to smoke whilst pregnant, at least do it in private. And Chantelle, I am afraid it is very selfish to continue smoking whilst pregnant, and to do it brazenly in this day and age beggars belief. It is putting the unborn child at risk. It is a proven medical fact that smoking is fatal to humans, and babies in the womb have no choice in the matter....THERE'S NO EXCUSE FOR IT!

Just saw a woman brazenly smoking whilst heavily pregnant. I could not help but give her a filthy look, which she reciprocated...and then I let loose and told her how selfish she was and how disgusting is was to be smoking whilst pregnant, and so publically. I told her she should be ashamed of herself as well. This woman was rendered speechless but I am glad I said all this. My husband says I was wrong to say anything and should have minded my own business but I was left so mad by what I saw I couldn't help myself. What do others think?!!

Who was the 'utter @#$%&'? Pray tell.