hanstands

Lol Helena, no I don't think book does mention damage to Mums brain from prolonged crying - perhaps a niche in the market there, anyone, anyone???!!;-) On the subject of crying and intense babies - I think for us with our, I think maybe quite high maintenance baby, what worked was just constant experimentation and aching stretching of our creativity and research until something seemed to slot into place and work for baby and us and it always seemed be a different thing to the next Mum and baby etc etc. For example the sling [or rather collection of - it can be addictive] was a godsend whereas 'The Baby Whisperer' a bad mistake gone wrong - many tears due to experiments with this book - the opposite to Helena's baby but all worked for different babies because of individual parents' research and alot of time, effort and self sacrifice to find a way to help their particular baby. Its hard work but worth it and more fulfilling in the end knowing you really have done absolutely everything you could have [within reason]. One simple sounding response we have if our baby is going through a particularly cryey, clingy phase is to go with that and stuff the housework, social life, put my life on momentary pause and hold him, sit with him on my knee, read books with him holding him close all day if that's what keeps him calm. Snowboarder, our baby also has never been able to go in a carseat without much crying so we now give up alot of car journeys and go by train and bus instead for the sake of calm and less stress for all. [Maybe sounds alot to do but in my view Mothering a baby is such a fleeting phase of life its worth it]. The more I do this the quicker he gets over it and seems secure again. The more I resisted his clingyness the more clingy he became. Sounds obvious but I was nervous to do it like this at first as I thought I'd spoil him and that he'd be more clingy. For us, so far at least he has become more and more independent and confident... But anyway the book is a must read for all new parents at least - In my experience it has been one of the most hopeful, inspiring, down to earth, non idealistic, practical, EXCITING parenting books I've read. But, that might just be me.

The book is less about telling you a philosophy, its more factual and scientific - I don't think its a book telling one extreme way of how to get a baby to sleep either - more describing how a babies brain develops...and so much more than that, not much about sleep really...on the note of sleep training though as its been raised, my parents we're from the seventies and apparently I slept through from 5 weeks old and have since been a terrible sleeper from as young as I can remember. Similarly, like Helena Handbasket, am desperate to help my baby grow into a good sleeper [but don't really know how]...as my sleep-life has proven, getting your baby to sleep through early on does not guarantee a good child or adult sleeper.

Just wondering if anyone has read this and what they thought of it with regards to raising babies?? Personally, we don't know quite what we would have done without it, so helped us understand our new arrival alot more than we would have otherwise...would really recommend to expectant parents and people with newborns...anyone with a young baby really. Its here if anyone's interested: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Why-Love-Matters-Affection-Shapes/dp/1583918175/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1251657155&sr=1-1

Fuschia Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > aj693, what a lovely gentle story! I loved this story too - and I will keep a note of it and probably use some of your methods when/if I need to do the same things [my baby is 10 months]...so refreshing and inspiring. Thankyou for sharing aj693.

Mine had 8 teeth by 6 months and I know how it feels to be bitten on a number of occasions. What worked for me was being observant as I could normally tell when it was going to happen a few seconds before and unlatch him - watch closely if he falls asleep on the boob. Time in the end sorted it out, he hasn't done it for months now, so I realised it was just another phase - it didn't last. Tried the yelping but he either cried or laughed. Hopefully it is just a phase for you!

Hiya - welcome to ED! In terms of breastfeeding groups - there is a great Breastfeeding cafe in Peckham library, I think on Thursday mornings [unless its changed since January]. Also, there is a La Leche League group that meets once a month in SE6. You can catch the 185 bus there from ED. Both are great for breastfeeding. Hope the birth goes well - exciting time!

What helped me was getting a softer mattress, we had a firm mattress which we Freecycled and bought a new softer one. This made all the difference to the hipache, backache type pains. The other help was my husband giving me a short back massage just before bed every night - not everyone's cup of tea though.

Hiya - that sounds awful - I've not had any experience specifically with eczema during pregnancy but have you tried a cream called 'Hope's Relief'. It costs ?12.95ish, quite pricey but worth it in my experience - you buy it at shops like Healthmatters on Lordship Lane or online, Holland and Barrett don't do it. I bought some for my baby's eczema and it worked better [no exaggeration!!!] than the Hydrocortizone, which was the only thing that worked before I tried this [and I tried alot of prescribed creams and lotions too]. If you're strapped for cash you're welcome to borrow ours for a while and therefore try before you buy. It has pretty much cleared up my baby's eczema, and all natural ingredients so won't harm little baba inside. Whatever you do, hope you find some relief from the horrid itching soon.