jennyh

It sounds like you did all that you could so try not to beat yourself up about it, you were very quick off the mark and helped as much as you could. I dont know what I would have done differently, prob very little. Hope she is ok.

What are people's thoughts on traffic going between HOP and ED? Daughter goes to nursery on upland road and for various reasons we don't want to move her so need to be able to do the journey relatively quickly and easily around 8am and 5.30pm...

This kind of info is really helpful, thank you!!

Thanks everyone, and for the private messages. Otta do you have feedback on any of the schools in Sydenham? Interesting to hear the comments on nunhead as I wasn't sure what was really there. Similarly Brockley as I wasn't sure how convenient it is to get back to ED to see all my pals! I know I need to get out and investigate, it's just one of the things I can never quite muster the energy for on a weekend, how unadventurous of me! I'm really appreciating all the comments! Thanks.

Sadly having to consider selling up in east dulwich and moving to the surrounding areas in the hope of getting a little more for our money. Sooooo...where is good??? Have friends in crystal palace, Sydenham, honour oak, nunhead but don't REALLY know these areas and if I ask them they all say its great, which is brilliant but it that informative or unbiased! Due to nursery location nunhead or honor oak would be better than the other locations but have even considered herne hill, west dulwich etc too. The things we love about dulwich are proximity of the parks, the libraries, the music groups, shops and transport links (use peckham rye, Denmark hill, ED and forest hill regularly). Have a car so can travel to see friends and go to Tippee toes etc still but would love somewhere that has something of a community vibe and convenient high street too, doesn't have to be as twee as dulwich mind! We have to lose some of the nice bits that make it so expensive to live here. Def need to have good schools as we will be staying in the next house for quite a while. Anyone got any thoughts??? I'm at a loss and its making me quite nervy. Would love to stay in ED but just not feasible sadly :(

Hey New to the lounge, tend to stick to the family room. We are looking to sell our flat in the new year and want to get some ideas from people who have ever sold privately (even better if someone had sold on this forum!). Just seems worthwhile putting feelers out to explore all the options, giving people a heads up in case they might be after a 2 bed garden flat. Anyone got any thoughts/advice? No reason why we wouldn't go with an agent but interested in hearing from people with other experiences. Thanks!

What a good post. The other day I saw a mother giving her toddler a packet of Doritos for breakfast whilst the baby (18 months I reckon) was digging into a packet of mint mentos at 8am. I definitely judged and was shocked at my response, in honesty it was actually sadness I felt rather than scorn. And that's just because since having a child myself I'm an emotional wreck over the smallest things. Having read this thread I will def check myself before passing opinion as everyone makes very valid points. I have a fussy 20 month old and feeding has been a pain since weaning so I will have more sensitivity as I'll prob be the one giving all sorts of stuff in the future! Come to think of it I have often raised eyebrows by giving mine the last dregs of a magnum and people have obviously thought the stick she's chewing on contained an entire magnum for a one year old! :)

My daughter had it a while ago and yes it did resolve itself and improved quickly, in a matter of days. She found the mouth ulcers were the worst, no real tips but cold yoghurt and fruit smoothie pouches plus calpol etc. good luck. It's sad to see them poorly. :(

How old is your daughter? When mine started nursery around 8 months she wouldn't have any additional tea but then around the age she hit 1 she wanted a small portion of something - a cheese sandwich, beans on toast, bit of pasta, risotto etc. However in the last 2-3 months (she is now 20 months) she has started refusing any tea after nursery and it seems a bit of a trend with others I know. Sometimes I am grateful if she will have an Ella's squeezy fruit pouch or a packet of rice cakes because usually she refuses most food. It may be that yours goes through stages as well and what you try to do for her now may change as time goes on. I also find that the nursery focuses on a more balanced and larger lunch and then tea is the lighter meal, across the day though she has a nice balance. Anything that goes in after 5.30 is a bonus and with a massive bottle at 7 she is usually pretty full until the morning. Good luck!

We had slumber bear and it was brilliant!! It is now the teddy that my daughter sleeps with which some people would try and avoid but I don't mind her having a comfort toy. It helped settle her into nursery and helps her sleep in different surroundings. We don't have the box in it anymore, just have the teddy.

Hello! Surprise surprise she legged it into nursery yesterday and ate 2 bowls of breakfast and all her lunch and tea! :) I watched through the gap in the door and she didn't even bother to wait for a chair to sit on before tucking in. Suffice to say at home in the evening she was a little minx again and kicked off at the mere sight of the dining table. I am thinking of adjusting her highchair so she learns to climb up and down safely (we have the tripp trapp) and may also get her a mini table and chairs in the hope of giving her some of the control she seems to want. I think that everthing is becomming a game of willpower for her but its helpful to see everyone's point of view. I am going to try and be more adaptable and relaxed about it as I feel that she is at an age where she is learning some of the important lessons and I don't want her to feel that meals are a struggle. Finger's crossed!!!

She may be teething, just waiting for the last 4 molars to come through but can't see anything although she has been drooling like a dog for weeks. Doesn't seem in any noticeable pain though which is a good thing! We just tried a little picnic style lunch where my husband and I both had sandwiches on plates on the floor and she sat between us with her own grown up plate with a few nibble bits on and she ate a few little things before she lost interest and wandered off. Sadly our place is too small to have a proper table and chair set up so we have a gateleg table that comes up when it's mealtime and we have fold out chairs, she could potentially sit on one of those. Making it less formal did seem to help a little, also giving her the choice to eat roaming around the room was quite useful today. We usually do books and have toys, games etc as she has always been a pretty rubbish eater but these ploys aren't working at the moment!

Yeah I do think she is still under the weather but its almost like a game at the same time, like you say I will keep trying small bits every so often. She just continues to surprise me at the moment with all the changes and I guess I'm thinking more than i should because that natural instinct to want to feed your child and see them healthy is so strong. Thanks everyone!

Hello Firstly, I know this is a stage and will naturally pass soon enough but for the time being its doing my head in and I'm also genuinely interested in finding out what might be going on, so bear with me! On Thursday my 20month old woke with a fever, tonnes of snot etc and ate half her breakfast and a bit of lunch. Since then she has refused any meals and we have gone back to giving a bit of milk in the afterloon and getting by on a bite of apple, a mini breadstick, a bit of pur?e, chunk of banana etc throughout the day. She hates the table and highchair so we have tried to keep it relaxed and give her food in the buggy etc, managed to get her to eat a few spoons of yoghurt using a medicine spoon today, novelty value worked momentarily. She shouts and screams and writhes around which is part of a stage she is going through as we've noticed her getting a bit more wild and frenzied recently. I think her food refusal was initially a lack of appetite as she wasn't well but although she still has the snot etc I do genuinely think she wants food but something else stops her eating it. It's almost like she hates the feeling of having food in her mouth, she might open up and chew once or twice before spitting it out. I thought it might be a sore throat or ulcers or teething but can't see evidence for anything. She ate 2 cheese and onion crisps yesterday and has had some biscuits so I think she is ok with hard food. It feels behavioural rather than physical but I can't work out why or how to make it any better. We've tried eating with her which makes no difference, tried giving stickers and clapping after each mouthful which worked for a little while, tried doing nothing and leaving her to helpl herself whilst we 'ignore' her but she still won't touch anything. She's going to nursery tomorrow and so will see if that kick starts her eating again and Obviously she wont starve herself but I'm just interested if anyone else has had is kind of thing going on. As she is my first obviously my experience not goes so far and this kind of thing is quite interesting as I am very aware of the current changes in her personality, just not sure what this is!? Any good theories do let me know! In the meantime I will continue preparing lovely food and gritting my teeth and smiling when she throws it on the floor! Thanks

Yep, went right to the gate, and secretly snuck some stuff in underneath!

I will watch this with interest. Mine is 19 months and started the occasional hit and slap about 6 months ago, just on and off but generally was very sensitive, flinched a lot around older and more boisterous children, hit behind my legs etc. She then got worse at home about a month ago and was throwing everything, hitting and slapping when in reach of me or her dad, would laugh and smile afterwards. I was very upset yesterday to learn at nursery she had kicked another toddler off the slide as she was in her way, and had been shrieking and hitting at every chance. previously she hadn't been doing this at nursery (she goes 3 days a week). I personally feel (mother's instinct, nothing more) that she is frustrated about not having immediate gratification, frustrated about not being properly understood (she is an excellent communicator but still has the odd word I dont get!) and is also simply testing what she can get away with. I am upset by it because she has always been praised by everyone for being sweet natured and thoughtful, I know it is a phase but its a bloomin trying one! So - as before really, I am working with the nursery to try and keep it in check. They remove her from playing and sit with her to the side for 1 minute, if she then says sorry she can play again. At home I have been putting her down on her own and leaving her whilst telling her she must say sorry. She is good at saying sorry but then does it again, often immediately after. She laughs and smiles. I think she knows she is wrong but I think I need to keep instilling this as she seems quite a bit younger than those who have turned 2, I think her comprehension is not so strong. Urgh, its horrid. It comes with such a lot of crying and sobbing and negative feeling. Trying to keep praise for good stuff as suggested. I am with you all on this, really appreciate how you guys feel!

Ha this made me chuckle, I had my daughter in the Bee without adjusting it for ages before I realised that you could, to the point where the seat was so shallow she was practically sliding off it. I have been so impressed at how i've been able to pull the seat out and the backrest up, has made such a difference!

Thank you Saffron, appreciate that. You're right, it wouldnt be the first baby so wouldnt be looking for the same services I guess, it is also a fair while away so a bit crazy to talk about at this stage!!!! :)

Thanks everyone! and that is intersting nymom. I reckon that the tactic of being there in person and also trying on the phone might be a good on, would look a bit nuts though. I think that the receptionist was a couple of minutes late opening the door by which point the phone was in full swing :) Those couple of minutes are vital! Fortunately I have an understanding boss. Might check out the forest hill road practice though seeing as there are a few recommendations.

Yeah I am at Crystal Palace Rd. I have seen the other thread, I just felt like I needed to expel some energy to the lovely family people as you're all nice! Very selfish I know:) I will def start considering a move to a new doctor though if there are any recommendations on widwifery services - I was at the Gardens before but it was too far away and I rarely saw the same midwife throughout my pregnancy, was always changing and I didn't feel I was getting the information/support I wanted. Appointment was for me so sadly I couldn't get my husband to do it...will do next time though if I can get away with it! Edited to say - live towards the top of Crystal Palace Road,anyone got any good recommendations of other GPs??? With good midwifery services??

Got there at 7.45am this morn (was a little delayed due to toddler antics, was aiming for 7.30) and was 6th in line waiting patiently. They were late opening the doors and by the time I got in and got to the front of the queue the earliest appointment was 11.10! Only 6 people had been ahead of me and without eavesdropping I can tell that only 2 of them made an appointment. By the time I left there were about 20 people, all looking a little frantic and desperate. The only reason I stay is because I missed out on the great midwifery services when I had my first and if there is a chance of having another I would like better midwives than I had before. Does anyone know if the phones are put on hold until they have dealt with the people at reception or do they simultaneously take phone calls out the back and do appointments in person up front?? If so then I will have to start standing in queue and on the phone at the same time as I am sure that there would have been an earlier appointment, surely!!!! Sorry,rant over. Just so annoying as I started a new job a week ago and already have to take time off. geez.

We use the sheepskin and the footmuff when cold, super snug! I agree that's footmuff is a good buy and can be used lying flat. Regarding whether he should sit up, the first position mug be suitable. Try it and see how he does, you will be able to tell if he is slumping.

Check out edtots.co.uk for lots of listings, you can search by day which makes it easy.

Just to echo the others, try going for a longer settling in period if you can, costs are a big factor! I settled my daughter in over about 3 weeks I think, as much for me as for her. I had never spent time apart from her and we were joined at the hip. She was about the same age as yours. I wont lie and say it was easy as it wasn't but it wasnt as bad as I anticipated, she didnt cry as much as I thought, I kept myself busy during the time she was there so I didn't sit there thinking about her. I spoke to the nursery a lot during the day to get updates on how she was/whether she was crying etc. Important to have a very good relationship with the staff as they need to help you and reassure you. She didn't eat or sleep at first but she did gradually get used to it and was happy as larry in a couple of weeks. Try not to sit there dwelling on it, picturing her little face all lost in amongst a mad bunch of raucous toddlers. She won't be like that, in my experience the younger ones get the most one-on-one attention and have lots of cuddles and time out when needed. Try not to think that nursery is a last resort or a bad choice if you can help it, I know its hard when it is something you feel you have to do. It isn't the same as you looking after her of course but in my experience it is a brilliant form of childcare and can be hugely stimulating and beneficial to her. At 18 months my daughter says please and thank you, she is very sweet natured, she shares beautifully, is very communicative and talks a lot. I have started to feel guilty if I don't do lots of fun stuff with her on her days with me as she has such a laugh at nursery! I love that she has all these friendly people at nursery and that she has bonds with lots of other children and adults, I don't feel like they are doing my job, they are doing something wonderful in providing something different for her. but that view definitely comes in time and for the first weeks I really felt just like you, lots of questionning if I was abandoning her, it wasn't fair on her, she was so little and vulnerable etc, it was my job. So yes, it does get a lot easier but you do need to be strong and also feel that the nursery is a good place for her to be. Hopefully some of the parents from that nursery will reply to your thread. Good luck, sure it will be fine.

This was the bane of my life when my daughter started nusery. She started in September last year and unfortunately it did take a full Winter and Spring for much improvement (so about 8 months), endless coughs and colds, 5 tummy bugs, 2 lots of conjunctivitis. I really made me depressed to be honest as she was really upset with it and it just disrupted everything but after a Summer I feel ready to do battle with this Winter! I think sadly it is the reality of this sort of childcare. I do think that they still get the same number of illnesses but the thing that improves is how long it takes to get over them. In the long run she will be much stronger though so try and focus on that! I did go and ask in Health Matters during one particularly bad bout of illness and they gave me some Sambucol which is elderberry juice, a very strong vitamin C. I have used that on occasion but not sure it actually does anything. Rest and time is probably the best thing for recovery, like us adults really! Good luck.