The Nappy Lady

Too true antijen. I was thinking about that poor lawyer lady whose story started this thread earlier as I cleaned my floors whilst baby was napping, and thinking how awful it was. I guess we will never truly know what led her to do what she did. Poor woman.

Very true - but of course they are laundering their own nappies, not yours, so if they wreck them it is their problem! If you don't TD your nappies it's fine to use Nappisan or similar if you like using it, but White Vinegar will do the job just as well and is cheaper too! Molly

Hi Gimme, This is the best website to you to find local laundry services; Via the the ?find a supplier? option; http://www.changeanappy.co.uk/index.htm Can I also suggest you check out this page on The Nappy Lady website which gives the pros and cons of these services; http://www.thenappylady.co.uk/public/articledetails.aspx?id=53 As others have said, home laundering is much easier than you would imagine, and will save you a huge amount compared to a laundry service. You will also have access to far superior cloth nappies. I am taking August off, but depending when baby is due, if you'd like to contact me in September I'd be happy to provide you with a detailed advice letter, and also book you in to attend one of my cloth nappy demos (I will also be doing a nappuchino event for Southwark Council in September but date is yet TBC). Incidentally - beware of soaking in Nappisan anyone (or other similar products) if you have a tumble dryer. These products contain chemicals which leave a residue in the nappies, and if subsequently tumble dried the heat causes a chemical reaction that attacks the elastic in most nappies and eventually ruins them. Better to soak in a capful of plain old white vinegar to half a bucket of water if you soak at all (I'm with Mellors on the dry pailing, much prefer it). Best wishes, Molly The Nappy Lady www.thenappylady.co.uk [email protected]

Fair points. What I should have originally posted was simply that the woman's right to choose, in some cases is not a choice at all. I know loads of women who HAVE to go back to work after having babies...there is no choice in the matter at all, and that makes me sad.

Moos Wrote: > That kind of comment from an intelligent woman > makes me want to go back to bed and hide. But thanks for implying I am an intelligent womean :)) I think in reality my brain vacated the premises long ago.

I know Moos, I did follow it up by saying I'd be the first to stomp my feet if I couldn't have the choice to work. I was really just trying to say that change often brings both good and bad. Now men and women both work we have got used to living off 2 incomes, and that has had all kind of repurcussions. No offence intended, I was just looking at it from a numbers point of view and not putting any greater thought into it (which I should have done). That's what you get for posting in haste between doing 10 other jobs. Molly

That made me laugh out loud...thank you, going to bed with a smile on my face :)) Glad to hear they are so enthusiastic about food, can they have a word with Baby C next week at the park please, she's taken to rejecting anything that isn't yoghurt or fruit...but then I did notice teeth number 5 and 6 peering through the gums tonight, so I imagine that's why. M x Fuschia Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Our babies will crawl back under the highchairs > after lunch and hoover up as seconds any scraps i > haven't swept away.

You are a star.....what would we all do without you Fuschia? As always I left things to the last minute.... Thank you, Molly

So....I need to get some disposables for the holiday...and in the past have always used Tushies, which I used to get from Health Matters - I like them as they don't have chemical gels in them. But they no longer sell them - does anyone know anywhere around here I might be able to get them? Yes, this really is The Nappy Lady asking for nappy advice - ha, has there been a cosmic shift?!!! Thanks, Molly

HA - baby C and the dog (Coco) have a symbiotic relationship I reckon, well not quite, but Coco loves the weaning phase...lies with her paws on the feet of the highchair catching anything that falls, I have no idea how much the baby has eaten and how much the dog has. Baby C now delights in leaning over the edge of her chair, holding out her hand and watching with fascination as the food falls to the floor to be gobbled up. Sigh. Coco is so good though, never oversteps the mark whilst baby is in the chair, but I did notice her cleaning up food from the actual seat (but never the tray thank goodness) when I lifted the baby out the other day. And now Baby C is crawling her favourite thing is to play in the dogs water bowl...and the other day I found her with the food bowl in her hand, held in front of her, not sure if she was planning to wear it as a hat or lick it, but either way it was a step too far and I conviscated it (mean mummy)! I feel compelled to tell you that the dog only gets fed on dried kibble or children's left overs (if I don't eat them first) so no awful tinned dog meat in the bowl, and she is regularly wormed and de-flead so I'm not quite as dreadful a Mummy as I sound....honest? Kids both seem to be healthy anyway!

snowboarder Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > The Nappy Lady Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Hugs Snowboarder....I'm at work today otherwise > > I'd come and help so you could get your head > down > > for an hour...is your other half around at the > > weekend? > > > > thank you:-) - but you have way more on your plate > than me!! > > Not looking good. Since going to sleep at 7 has > already woken once. ohhhh.. HA - yes, but everything stops for a baby cuddle...held a 5 week old the other day and couldn't believe how little and cuddly he felt compared to my big wriggler. How does that happen in 9 short months?

pmsl Fuschia, that reminds me of by eldest when just out of nappies...she developed a poo phobia and would hold it in until she just 'had to go' then try to run away from it...we were in France on holiday at the time and on more than one occassion I had to chase her along the beach with a nappy sack trying to 'catch' and apologising to others as I went. Nightmare.

As many of you know I am really not a career woman, and I do appreciate that how I feel isn't the case for all women, but seriously I am not convinced that our so called emancipation is as good thing as it first appears. Of course the world had to change, but not everything it has brought is good....house prices could never have got so high if only one half of a couple was earning money, there would be twice as many jobs out there, and we wouldn't be under the huge pressure we now are to try to be a breadwinner, a mother, run a home etc. etc. Having said all that, if I was chained to the kitchen sink, without the freedom to choose, I'm sure I'd be the first one to by trying to burn my bra. Call my a hypocrite if you wish, I put my hand up to it. I often lie in bed thinking about all I have to do and it is like Tetris blocks coming down one after the other, I keep clearing 1 or 2 rows at the bottom, but they keep on falling down and piling up on top. It is often a case of clinging on by my finger tips..the only good thing is that having a 5 year old I do know that in 3 or 4 years time it is going to get a lot easier, and when both are at school I'll be able to get back out there and start earning more money again. It is strangely comforting to know I'm not alone in feeling this pressure. I always wanted to be at home with children, I never realised that with that would come a constant worry about money, and that is hard. R&A I do feel for you...I was never the main breadwinner, and that really must be so scary. All I can say is that things do always seem to work out one way or another so don't lose hope. Will you get decent maternity leave? If you can have the first 9 to 12 months at home with baby before going back to work I think that is really important. Molly x

snowboarder Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I know this might be controversial - but aside > from getting weighed does anyone find the HVs > helpful? > I waited an hour and half the last (only) time I > went. I was asked if everything was ok, and > without waiting for answer told to enjoy my baby > as it is a lovely time, and sent packing. Cool, > thanks. Bit upset because the midwives were fab > fab fab. > Oh well...advice on this forum is so much better! Never, ever, ever go to baby clinic. Weigh your baby at home - get on scales on own, then holding baby, and work it out for yourself. You know if your baby is OK or not....and if you are worried I think I'd go anywhere for advice before baby clinic! HV's are (in my humble opinion) mostly a complete waste of time. The one who came to see me after Baby 2 was born came assuming it was my first baby...even though I told her it wasn't she still spent an hour telling me how to breastfeed (I had a 75th centile exclusively breast fed thriving baby at this point???!!), and other random pointless info. Oh, and then when I mentioned that it was sometimes tricky to fit a decent meal in she said "well it's your 2nd baby, you know how to do things 1 handed by now"! Seriously, I nearly threw her out of my house at that point. Then there is the one who told my friend (who uses cloth nappies on her baby) that she needed to make sure her baby had plenty of nappy off time to ensure she didn't end up with bandy legs....errr yes, because all the pre-disposable adults in the world are clearly walking in John Wayne sty-le.....??? They seem to make mis-information an art form. There are not many people who make me angry, but HV's seem to manage it on a fairly regular basis, given that they are dealing with people who are often at a happy, but often really fragile point in their lives why do so many of them seem incapable of showing any kindness or empathy? Sigh. Molly

Jo Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > What a confusing business - am just about to send > off my form to claim MA. Can I just phone them > with a date when I decide to finish? > > Actually Molly, you've reminded me that I should > probably do my 08/09 return now rather than wait > until I have total baby brain :)) Def. do it as soon as you can. I managed to get my DH to have the baby for a couple of half days so I could get mine done and had been really dreading it. In the end it wasn't that bad, but what was tricky was that I haven't been filing as I go since baby arrived so had to spend quite a while sorting through all my paperwork etc. Thankfully I'm not high power enough to have that much though!

Hugs Snowboarder....I'm at work today otherwise I'd come and help so you could get your head down for an hour...is your other half around at the weekend? When Z sleeps today can you have a lie down with him? Do try to if you can, regardless of what jobs you have 'on the list'. Not sure if you recall, but I had a dreadful time with Baby C at around the 4 month mark, much as you are doing now, I was up and down with her in the night like a yoyo, and in the end went back to co-sleeping with her in the spare double bed in her room so DH could get a good nights sleep and I was less disturbed having her next to me, so could just keep patting her, or sticking her back on the breast. It does seem to be quite common for them to go through patches of very disrupted sleep around this age, and I remember someone saying it is also linked to key development stages when they are trying to master a new skill. I think it is also linked to them getting through the newborn stage, needing less sleep in total over 24 hours, but not yet being mobile, so not tiring themselves out physically etc. I think it is one of the hardest phases. I wish I had a magic answer for you....all I can say is this phase too will pass and you will look back in a couple of years and the entire 1st year will seem like a blur....in the meantime keep hanging on, and rest whenever you can, as much as you can. Do whatever you need to do to survive, and if that means co-sleeping, feeding to sleep etc. so be it. Equally don't be afraid to try new stuff. For the daytime naps, can you see clearly when he is tired (eye rubbing etc)? Do you generally put him down in his cot rather than out in buggy (I find C sleeps much better and longer in her cot)? If you have a CD player in his room try having a restful CD (you can get specific baby lullaby CD's if need be) that you put on every time it is time for a nap...he will soon learn to associate the music with sleep - we've done that with both girls and it now calms C the minute I put the music on. Do you have a baby moniter in his bedroom? Personally I'd say that if you're not resting with him, put him in his cot for his nap and go off and do whatever you need to do, and DON'T have the moniter on. It may be he is waking and you are going to him right away, when if left for a few minutes he would settle himself back down. Baby C does this fairly often and if I'm near by I will hear it (whilst ironing etc.) and before I go to her she's asleep again..... if I'd had the baby moniter I'm sure I'd have been in there like a shot and the nap would have been over. If he is really away, crying or 'shouting' for you of course you must go to him, but otherwise they do sometimes re-settle. At 9 months C now tends to do a short morning nap (depending how early she's got up), then a big lunchtime sleep - 1 to 2 hours, then awake from about 2pm to 7.30pm. After my post the other week, as I predicted she got a cold and we had a few nights of her getting me up again, and some early starts - 5am was the worst...yuk, but now seem to be more or less back on track, was a 6am start today though which isn't morning in my opinion! I do hope things improve soon.... Molly x

Pickle Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Oooooh, very nice indeed, well done EDF team! > > Is it just me, or did anyone else find they had > the jitters last night when the forum wasn't > available?! Just typical it was down on an > evening where Mr Pickle was out and there was > nothing decent on TV! I had to do ironing instead > :-S Yep me too Pickle...9pm on a Wednesday evening...what else would one be doing?

Fuschia Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Moos Wrote: > Or a > > don'twipethatonmyshirtohGodtoolate.... > > Rofl. > > I'm going to start a thread on most disgusting > habits we have.. I must confess to occasionally > wiping a passing snotty nose on the inside of my > pj top... LOL.....that thing I swore I'd never do, but have had to resort to on occassion, of licking a tissue and using it to clean a dirty face OMG I have turned into my mother!

Just walking in and having a look around the all new 'advert free' family room. Gosh, it's so spacious! Snigger. Molly

Have to say I know at least 1 other child that's had violent sickness with the Tamiflu, he was older - 8 ish, but his Mum just decided not to give it to him, and he recovered well over the course of 4 or 5 days. But not sure what I would do....such a tough decision to make, just hope I don't have to face it. Hope any little ones in this thread with it (or their parents for that matter) feel better soon. Molly

Fuschia Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Yep, weather allowing. I can give you the pots > then, NL! Ha, great minds think alike...just replied to other thread to say the same!

No - and also, I've just 'phoned HMRC and it sounds like an error in their system - I have to submit my return, then call them next week and they will correct the error so my tax bill will come down....yippee!!!! Feel like I've just won the lottery! Molly

Couldn't make today, but very up for next Wednesday morning if anyone else is? Edited to say could do Tuesday instead if that would be better? Molly

I can't believe it either - am going to phone HMRC to double check, but it does seem to be the case. I wish they had just given me less in the first place! I seem to recall you can go on leave any date you like with X weeks of the birth, you just have to let them know when, if you need to stop sooner than planned you can do this, you just phone and advise them that you have finished work...I stopped 2 weeks before baby was due, and it is then paid for 38 weeks or so as I recall....so I got paid from October until end of June. The MA helpline people are wonderful by the way and very helpful, the number is 0845 608 8610, they will help with anything you're not sure of... Molly

Hi Ali, It shouldn't affect your maternity allowance because it isn't work you are doing during your leave, it is just as you say late payment....but when you do your tax return all your income (including your MA I am sorry to say) will be treated as income and you will be taxed on it :-( I just did my 08-09 tax return and have discovered this to my disgust, I kind of assumed that MA wouldn't be taxed...but it seems they give with one hand and take away with the other.....sigh.... Also, are you aware that you are allowed 12 'keep in touch' days whilst receiving MA to do any paperwork, or go into work for a day? This is useful, and I discovered you don't have to actually declare to them what days you do, unless you go over the 12 day allowance. The annoying thing is that they can't cope with you working for part of a day...it is all or nothing, so if you decide to use a KIP day, try to make full use of it if that makes sense. Though as I say it isn't strongly policed so it seems. Molly