The Nappy Lady

I believe that Sillywoman was referring to the fact that it is illegal to have a home birth in almost all American States (with 1 or 2 exceptions). I honestly think this discussion is in danger of going off topic in relation to the comments between Sillywoman and AnnaJ, if we'd been discussing this in a room face to face the confusion would not have arisen, it is the result of that age old problem of reading words without the added context of body language and facial expression. Molly

Shocking isn't it...and to think everyone on here was a baby once, with a mother, and possibly a HUGE silvercross pram.

I suspect a lot of the women are not being intentionally rude at all, they are simply exhausted, stressed and/or worrying about why baby isn't sleeping/how on earth they are going to get the housework done/how they are going to cope financially when their maternity pay runs out etc. etc. and don't even realise that they have just blanked you/run over your foot etc. etc. The mothers I meet in East Dulwich are far from being so called 'Yummy Mummys', I think you'll find most of them in North and West London.

Helena Handbasket - I'm envious of thin legs!! The nicest thing about this thread is to know we are all feeling the same way. My friend had her babies in her early 20's (so they are now 16 and 14) and when she came on holiday with me this year people thought she was our Au Pair...seriously, she is just one of those naturally slim women, and also I must admit she does watch what she eats. But you know, I'm happier than I've ever been (mostly, apart from the odd stressful Mummy moment), and I reckon really my days of crop tops should probably be over anyway at 40. I will make up for it by being a 'wild' granny one day I hope! What's a bit of flab between friends. Dressing wise, I think it does vary, but generally speaking, tops which gather at the sides and drape over the tummy seem to be good (ala Trinny and Susannah), and smock top / short dresses over jeans maybe? Think if you've got boobs you're supposed to wear tops that have a V or U neck rather than a high neck as well..... I try not to wear really baggy stuff as I think it makes me feel and look worse, better to try to accentuate any vaguely good curves I have, but hide the flabby tummy. I mostly seem to end up in jeans, a t-shirt and a cardi these days though, not much time to think or care about it ahead of the school run. Worst fashion mistake this week? Getting caught out by the hot afternoon and having to take my jumper off to reveal a strappy t-shirt with a breast feeding bra sticking out of it in all directions underneath. But hey, I was only at Leapers so who cares? I think actually being pregnant is the best bit as you get to stick your tummy out with pride, and at least it is firm then! Molly

Hmmm, we had a BabyDan (I know I'm always going on about it on here!). Tried to use it as a playpen and DD1 screamed - think I left it too late to get her used to it (though never thought of parking it in front of the TV). But we've used it MASSIVELY opened up as a fire guard / room divider / around the pond in the garden in the summer, so despite being pricey it has been worth its weight in gold. In terms of showers I've always just taken baby into the bathroom with me. Have to put the loo seat down, lift the bin off the floor and let her get all the bath toys out of the little box we keep them in, but it keeps her happy. Actually now she is walking/crawling the stair gate is placed so it allows her to go from the bathroom to play with her big sister (5) in her bedroom too - I just make sure there are no tiny Barbie type bits on the floor, and thankfully O is old enough to understand, and they seem to rub along pretty well. I was amazed at first that she didn't complain when I got in the shower but she seems very happy to play and in fact I think she knows that when I am in the shower there is no point complaining because I can't / am not going to be able to pick her up. She does like to play pee po with me around the shower curtain though, and quite often when I get out and start to do my make up she's there trying to raid my make up back...sigh....can see it will not be long before I'll have BOTH of them asking to use my lip gloss. Molly

Forgot to say - fixed front wheel (or option to fix it) is best for running to avoid problems with wheel suddenly turning and potentially 'locking'. Molly

I agree for Powerpramming any buggy will do...but if you want to do full on running something with bigger wheels is better. fmay - I inherited what I called my 'big purple buggy', a 3 wheeler with 16" bicycle type wheels specifically designed for running. It only weighs 6kg and folds in half so not too awful in the car etc. It gives a mega smooth ride - I actually use it for dog walking 'off road' around Nunhead Cem. but also up in Derbyshire etc. it's been over all kinds of ground. I have also run with it. The make is Baby Trend, American I think, but if you look on ebay there are a lot of these type of running buggy's around and you should be able to pick one up cheaply. Molly

I'm with tiddles - give it a year (or more). I felt 'stuck' then suddenly over the last couple of months people keep telling me how much weight I've lost, which is a great feeling, though I think it is more about fat re-distribution if I'm honest! Baby is 10 days off turning 1, so I do think it takes that long. But also I'm still breast feeding, so my eating is still not quite under control (glances guiltily at the cake crumbs on empty plate next to me)..... First time around I found everything went almost back to normal eventually (and did get a personal trainer for a while when DD1 was about 2 which really sorted me out, until I got preggers again! It has certainly taken longer this time...since baby number 2 I have realised that my days of hipster jeans with short T-shirts really are long gone (must go through those bags of clothes lurking in the attic). I think only the very, very lucky or the very, very rich and famous - thanks to surgery - manage to end up without a 'muffin top'/baby belly in the end (not to mention the saggy boobs), I am consoled by the fact that nearly every Mum I know is in the same boat, and hey, they are the 'scars' of motherhood, we should wear them with pride! I say focus on the bits of yourself that you do like, write them down if you have to on post it notes and stick 'em around the mirror and go with the flow. Molly x

As a few people recently have been posting about these issues; This is a very useful group if you are considering a home birth; http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/homebirthUK/?yguid=221011890 And this is quite a useful group for advice on slings (though I believe it is US based, so it does depend on what sling you are looking at, Ergos, Becos etc. very common on there though); http://groups.yahoo.com/group/babywearing/?yguid=204295446 Molly

Don't we only have heroes now in the same way we only have actors, not actresses? Equality and all that...sigh. M

Well said Toast. If we all support our local schools we should soon see vast improvements.

....and so true!!!!

Hi, Just wanted to say my daughter went into reception in Jan 2009 (July birthday so missed sept 08) she was 4.5 therefore and it was fine and actually very gentle/play and learning environment with them able to go through to nursery area when they wanted to. In Sept she went up to year 1 and I feel it has all been very easy and smooth with her already knowing her classmates, routine etc and not being so tired each day even though she really is learning and working properly now. I know every child is different but I honestly felt she was ready for nursery and has thrived ever since so it isn't all bad. The whole DOB thing is a total pain and so confusing though. Oh and I tell you what 9-3.30 sounds like ages but the days don't half fly by, I am forever rushing to pick her up and did forget completely once when new baby was about 4 months....was shoppingin Peckham at 4pm when they rang and felt like the worst mother in the world - don't think she even noticed!!! M

I was told they don't have to attend school until they are 5, but as of their 5th birthday is is a legal requirement that they go. Molly

If you book a home birth and change your mind you can easily swap, much harder to do the reverse. With Brierly I saw the same midwife for every appointment bar two, and was lucky enough to even have her at the birth, I was in tears when she signed me off (blame it on the hormones)!! I felt I had a real relationship with her tho and we have met up since with other mums and babies which has been lovely. We live so near Kings and if you do need to transfer to hospital in labour it is usually a calmly discussed decision and midwives escourt you, very rare indeed to be blue lighted in. Plenty of time to consider it all anyway ;-))

Hi there, Yes, she can adapt patterns, and often makes her own patterns up as she goes, to fit with the odds and ends of wool she has - she's amazing! Just PM me when you are sorted and I can pass on her address etc. Best wishes, Molly

Hi there, My Mum (80!!) is a demon knitter - I've sold her stuff via the forum before, and can email you some photos of jumpers and cardigans she's done if you like. She is with me now, but lives up in Matlock. Not a problem for her to knit and post to you though if that helps, it would take her a couple of weeks to produce several for you......if you provide patterns and wool the cost would be ?5 per cardigan, or if you want her to provide the wool she can do it that way and estimates about ?8 per cardigan including the price of the wool. She does have patterns too if needed! Hope this helps, but of course if you can get someone more local totally understand (I used to knit before children hijacked my life, will get back to it one day!!!). Best wishes, Molly

Just to say the wait lists for Albany, Brierly etc. do come up now and again...I know someone who got a call at about 36 weeks to say they had room to take her, so she switched with great delight, so don't despair. Must admit, with No.2 as soon as I got the two little lines on the stick my priorities were; 1. tell hubby! 2. phone the Brierly! Or was it the other way around??? Hmmm, in any case I was their first October birth at the point when I rang them in the January 2008!!! You do have to get in fast. Molly

The Handysit is a great idea I reckon, can be used at home and easily taken with you when you travel. We have a Svan Highchair we bought (at great expense) for baby no. 1 and it is fab, and is now in use for baby no. 2 (and it does convert to a raised chair as they get older, but we also have a Handysit on loan from friends, which I used when friends are visiting so their baby can sit up and eat comfortably too, and for when we travel.....and if I'd known about them back at the start I would have just had one for full time use - as it fits onto a normal chair at your table it means you don't end up trying to fit chairs, plus high chairs around your table too. Snowboarder - it is a painful process we all have to go through, I don't think there are many of us out there who haven't bought at least a few 'mistakes' for our first, but amongst all of this we drop on some gems, and forums like this are fantastic for knowlege sharing - provided you listen to the advice of course!!!! Molly

We also went straight to a single bed at 2.5 found daughter fast asleep on floor a couple of times in the early days I think she just slid out her sleep. You can get rails that simply fit by sliding under the mattress if you are worried, and the rail bit swings so either up to keep child in or down so hanging towards the floor, but I would try without first and see how it goes. Oh and if you have a standard single you can always put an adult up - worth keeping old cot mattress as spare on floor for child/sleepovers etc or get a single with pull out 2nd matress for long term planning - our 5 year old is sleepover mad! Molly

Yes, that too!!

Oh no, hang on, it is probably OK as long as I never show any appreciation by giving someone a box of chocolates, or making them a cup of tea......

Bang go all those after school play dates then eh?! Honestly, it is so pathetic.

Don't worry - they don't use canes any more!!!

My friend (secondary school teacher) has moved near to the school. Having checked Ofsted's she was happy...says it seems quite strict, but she'd rather that than the other! Molly