a bit dizzee

The good news is that judging by the huge bang and prolonged scrape the 176 I was on made when going over this hillock, it will soon be carved down to within legal limits.

Depends what pants, obviously, but a fair bit classier than pants left in a carrier bag alongside a hard drive.

Yep, I'll go round the dry cleaners later in the week if no-one's collected it. No ticket I could see attached, though.

Nope, not pants. Much classier.

Found: Seemingly recently collected piece of dry-cleaning in gutter on Crawthew Grove. Bought inside for safe keeping. DM or reply with a description and it's ready to collect. Clue: you are probably a woman, or at least a quite open-minded man.

Another extremely helpful reply, thanks sallyfran

Thanks to everyone on this thread and the PMs I've received. Really appreciate you taking time out to offer advice.

Our lovely little three-year-old lad has developed a pretty crippling stammer in the last few weeks, and having taken telephone advice from medical professionals, we are looking for a local speech therapist to help us. It would be great if someone who has experienced a similar problem could offer a positive recommendation. Thanks.

I seem to remember someone mentioning a glut of damsons in Warwick Gardens last year. Did I dream this? Had a quick wander through and couldn't see anything.

Don't know if Islington are continuing with the scheme, tbh. Hard to justify in its current guise, though. More dog bins and bags available at all dog bins wouldn't be a bad start. There are precisely zero dog bins on my ten-minute route from home to the Rye with my veteran hound, and while this is not an issue as I am a lovely, friendly, cuddly, responsible dog-walker, it does show that this would be an excellent place to start. Bit cheaper than 20 wardens, too.

Islington tried a similar scheme of 'zero tolerance'. In the first six months, 20 dog wardens issued, on average, one penalty every two days. ?40 a day for the wages of 20 blokes wondering around. Good luck getting this one through in the current climate. Pointless busy work.

Saw this bloke pretending to be on his phone on Heber Road. Now that's fame..... http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard/article-23860903-story-behind-the-man-whos-always-behind-the-news-reporters.do

My dear old mum and dad popped down for a few days after Christmas. Being of a certain age, they charged thoughtlessly from the car on arrival in ED, armed with festive booze and gifts, and left the keys in the ignition. Here they remained for three days and nights, with the car (05 BMW) unlocked, on the street, parked helpfully under a streetlight. Whilst it is encouraging to see our footballers and cricketers finally get their act together, car theft is an area in which we have traditionally led Europe. South London has long been a home to some of our best performers in the field, and to see them miss a sitter like this makes me concerned for the future. Have they had it too good for too long? Has the influx or foreign talent led to an erosion of new blood coming through? Are the new Academys to blame? Back to basics, lads. This simply isn't good enough.

2008's positions in parenthesis 1 (8) Some people over the road had a party last weekend and refused to turn off the music at midnight 2. (NE) Someone has picked some flowers from the park 3. (1) The distant sound of a small child's laughter has prevented me from enjoying my pint of mild 4. (2) A dog/fox has done a poo/frightened my precocious child 5. (17) This organic meat is suspiciously cheap 6. (25) I left my car unlocked and someone stole my i-pod/mobile/organic butternut squash from the passenger seat 7. (13) The pavement on a nearby street has been repaved, whilst my pavement remains a death-trap. Literally. 8. (NE) The sushi served up in a local bar does not live up to the standards I became used to during my time in Tokyo 9. (5) Some builders made some noise 10 (8) A waitress with a funny accent made me wait while she had fun with her colleagues. As you can see, life in East Dulwich has not got any easier over the past 12 months. I, for one, am at the end of my tether trying to negotiate the slings and arrows of life that Lordship Lane and its surrounding areas continue to throw at us.

A mate of mine was mugged just off Dog Kennel Hill, by the 24 hour shop, at around 1am on Sunday morning. Mobile phone again the target (not a particularly flash one, either), which surprised him as he was also carrying some kind of modern-day tapeless Walkman device (for listening to popular music).

Sorry, ????, I can't see the words Bet Fred without biting, and biting hard. The uninitiated wouldn't know the difference between a quality independent bookies, a Ladbrokes and a Bet Fred, in terms of the clientele each shop will tolerate. Just to confirm, if you have half a clue what you are doing, don't even bother with Bet Fred as you won't last long. If you want to play the machines, Bet Fred will make you feel most welcome.

Why is the arrival of Bet Fred fantastic? They don't lay a bet of more than a score if you're trying to back anything remotely lively, fail to honour advertised prices, and treat UK racing with such contempt they haven't even subscribed to Turf TV meaning you can't watch most decent racing live in their shop. They are a joke firm among anyone that treats punting even semi-seriously. They are more interested in finding another location for the loathsome and dangerous FOBTs than being a bookmaker in any traditional sense. So, in effect, Lordship Lane has another arcade, aimed solely at getting people hooked in risk-free (for Bet Fred) roulette machines. Bet Fred are all that is wrong with high street bookmakers, imo.

You sound nice, Eater81. You were seething Inside 72 dared to occasionally leave the door open - leading to the distant sound of joy and laughter drifting into your miserable world - and now you already wish ill on a new business about which you know, literally, nothing. Perhaps, given your attitude to urban noise, Herefordshire may be a better bet. May I suggest Eastnor, although you may want to plan a week's long trip to Umbria around The Big Chill.

Thank you all, most sincerely - a deeply pleasing response here. As you can all see, there are a number of problems that affect East Dulwich residents on a day-to-day basis that I had not highlighted. I'll make it an OFFICIAL top 12 so as to reflect the worries and concerns that have become apparent by the replies on this thread. 11. A friendly dog approached my untethered, unmuzzled child in the park, and nearly took her eye out with its wagging tail. 12. Someone enjoyed themselves at volume after 11 o'clock near my house. Well done, East Dulwichites. If we can continue to bring these serious problems to a head, we can move forward together, as one happy, environmentally aware army (non-military, of course!)

1. A Foxton mini has prevented me parking directly outside my house and unloading my organic vegetables/bugaboo. 2. The distant sound of a small child's innocent laughter has ruined my enjoyment of a pint of mild in EDT. 3. A dog/fox has done a poo and the owner/Derek Fowlds has failed to pick it up. 4. A surly waitress on ?5.85 an hour has failed to offer me an organic, gerbil-vomit coffee the moment my (slightly disappointing) dessert of hand-picked, free-range local apple pie was removed from my table at Franklins/Palmerston/Rice N Peas . 5. A local bakery is offering interesting bread at ?1.50 rather than a loaf of Mother's Pride at 95p. 6. An unsuccessful independently run business has closed down, giving a heartless chancer the opportunity to open a successful, viable operation. 7. A bookmaking firm is trying to occupy an empty shop, which will inevitably lead to lots of shady characters hanging around the neighbourhood, hassling the locals and trying to play Find The Lady outside the organic wine shop. We've all seen The Sting, who knows where this will end? 8. The bloke in Green & Blue is clearly a surly nutcase as he didn't acknowledge me when I went in to browse the "Spicy Red" section. 9. The chains are ruining Lordship Lane and taking away all the individual character it had when it was a ghost town in 1991. 10. Why is there no Marks & Spencers? As you can see, there are lots of things to complain about in East Dulwich despite it appearing to be a perfectly pleasing place to live. What is your favourite complaint?