ClareC

Isn't "men" simply a shortened version, slang even of "gentlemen"? I don't see the two terms as different, the same as I never would have thought "lady" would be offensive to some. Personally I prefer the term lady to woman but I see both as descriptive of gender and nothing more..... It amazes me how easy it is to offend unintentionally!

It's never occurred to me that the term "lady" could possibly be deemed offensive. Surely it's simply a manner of speech that fits into what is being said as demonstrated in the waiter example. If a stranger of the female gender picked up a book in the library which my toddler dropped, I too would tell my child to thank the lady, it's simply descriptive and sounds nicer than 'woman'. I don't think I've heard any toddler use the word woman.

Grotty Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > This thread just made me choke. I've never heard > of Brazilian Blowdry and assumed it meant an extra > feature of the well-known "brazilian"! The first > couple of comments about achieving straight hair > for long periods of time left me slightly bemused, > then it clicked. I can't stop laughing. At > Myself. Oh well. You learn something new... Tee hee, I only knew as I thought it sounded rude and then googled it! The results sounded totally not rude and too good to be true! Can't stop thinking of how the other type of Brazilian could be blow dried.. Sounds painful!

I second pinwala, it's lovely! Perfect for kids and adults! There is a turtle rescue place near Bentota (towards Galle) that would be good too. The stilt fisherman in Galle worth seeing too and there was a glass bottom boat trip there too which would be children friendly.

I second fridge phonics! You can get them from ELC and I think there is 20% off at the moment. Both I & L play with them, I sings the alphabet in full and likes the songs for each letter. Also gives you some entertainment in the kitchen although we have used on a radiator too - not so good if turned up high!

Thx for all the replies. Do you still need to Blowdry to get 'body' into your hair or does it solve that as well as frizz!

Does it work? Sounds too good to be true! Does it really last 2-4 mths? How long is realistic to expect it to last? Am considering..... C x

MGolden Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > susyp Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Dummies - my 4 year old is terrified of them. > And > > they are everywhere - even the London Transport > > Museum has them! She loves princesses and we > took > > her to a castle but she was frightened out of > her > > wits as there were so many dummies! > > Does tower of london have dummies does anyone > > know?! > > > I thought you meant the sort that you give babies > to pacify them! And for a moment I wondered why > the London Transport Museum had them and assumed > they had made some sort of sculpture of > lost/dropped/abandoned dummies. Even as I type > this I am chuckling at my stupidity - but thanks > for the laugh. :) > > > > > > > > Glad it wasn't just me !!!

It's a bad year! We have lots of sloe bushes in our garden and there are very few this year.

When I was in the lower sixth there was a girl in the year above me that seemed to constantly be in the physics lab with one of the physics teachers. He was married to another teacher at the school and we assumed the girl concerned had a crush on him. He was one of the 'fun' teachers. As soon as she finished school he left his wife and they were officially together! He had two children who must have been @ 10 and 12 so he couldn't have been that young. There seemed to be no repercussions at school either. Because she was 18 and allegedly they only got together after she left school that was apparently ok. Their relationship lasted a number of years, she then dumped him and he was last seen depressed and drunk hanging out in local pubs talking to anyone that would listen telling how he had been wronged and she used him.... Had totally forgotten about that until this thread, I don't remember being shocked at the time just though the girl concerned was odd and felt sorry for the other teacher (his wife). Def not the norm though!! No men, cars or vodka at our school gates! The only alcohol was on the ski trips but that's another story!

I grew up in Kent and went to an all girls Grammar school in the late eighties / early nineties. At 14 most girls didn't have boyfriends at all, if they did they were the same age or a year or two older. There was one girl in my class who didn't have the best of family life who "dated" much older men that drank in her parents pub, a very rough pub at that. We didn't pay it too much attention at the time, tended to think she was making the whole thing up, it definitely wasn't the norm. Funnily enough a school friend and I did have a conversation years after leaving school to the effect that we suspect in hindsite (and age) she was being abused. If the things she told us happened genuinely did happen, she was a willing party but at 14 she was underage and was being taken advantage of. Looking back the whole situation was extremely sad, I just hope everything worked out for her.

If its still let and let through an agent, check your contract with them. Often they include a clause where they get a percentage of the sale fee!

haruki Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Reading this thread (and others on the forum) > anyone would think the hound of the baskervilles > was loose in south london. > > While I completely agree that agressive dogs > should be kept under control and on the lead, it's > completely impractical to suggest that dog owners > ought to ask everyone they meet if it's okay for > their dog to approach strangers. > > It's also worth getting some perspective here. > Although dog bites are on the rise, they're still > far from being prevalent. The NHS usefully > collates hospital admission statistics, and > looking at the under 15s (people seem most > concerned about kids here) dog bites/attacks fall > at number 28 on the list for 2010-11 (1422 > incidents). As a comparison, falls from playground > equipment is at number 2 (8149 incidents) and > kicking/scratching/bites from people is at 22 > (1822 incidents). > > Given that people are clearly more dangerous than > dogs, perhaps we should be asking permission of > everyone we meet in the park if it is okay to walk > near them? I wish there were a 'like' option :)

But as a couple the second salary needs to be pretty significant to afford 2x Childcare enabling work..... Edited to add, I'm not disputing that 42k is a good salary, just questioning whether it is just 10% that earn this or more.

zeban Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > ClareC Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Does earning 42k a year really put you in the > top > > 10% earners in the country? Where did this > "fact" > > come from? > > > > > Wow, you really live on another planet don't you! > Do you actually realise how little some people > earn? I'm not saying a family on 42k in London are > rich but by god you are not poor. You may struggle > to keep a car and go on family holidays abroad but > you do not struggle to feed and clothe your > children, or pay your rent- as mortgages, which > I'm sure most of you have- are lower than private > rents in London. I have no sympathy for people who > just don't realise what's it's like to live with > so little. And how did you reach that conclusion?? Perhaps you would be so kind to explain how an (admitted) lack of knowledge regarding national salary statistics on my part somehow correlates to no understanding how little some people earn? ? I don't see the link myself.? Perhaps I am simply more than aware of the cost of living.? If earning 42k puts someone into that top 10% bracket, in financial terms the top 10% of supposed high earners (ie a minority of the population as a whole) could not possibly buy a? family house not only in London but a large part of the country too.? I guess I am so detached from reality I just hadn't spotted those 10 x salary 100% mortgages out there ;)?

INMCD Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Now I know why I never comment on this forum! > DaveR - no-one's paying me to stay at home. I work > and contribute to the family finances but when we > lose the child benefit it'll make a big different > to us. Most working parents spend a large > proportion of their salaries on childcare and the > child benefit definitely helps with that. The cost of Childcare is extremely high in this country, this actively stops a large number of people being able to work at all. Taking child benefit away makes it even harder (financially) to work. If it means less people being able afford to work that has a very negative effect. Edited to add, if earning 42k genuinely puts you in the top 10 % of earners nationally, it's sad that someone on that bracket couldn't physically afford Childcare x 2 plus living expenses in ED. surely the government should be encouraging parents to work not making it financially impossible! Something needs to change.

Mrs TP Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Gosh this thread has certainly brought out the > good, the bad and the ugly and most > disappointingly the vitriolic keyboard warriors. > > Fufton I am sorry to have referred to bankers > above and should have left it at the super-rich. > It was an unwarranted cheap shot - which is about > all I can afford these days :) > > As others have said, it is not just about income > but outgoings too. There will be those who feel > they can take the hit and those that can't. Three > years ago I would have gladly taken the hit but > having since been made redundant we have come to > rely on that money to make a significant > difference to our modest but not breadline > existence. Hadn't realised only those in the most > direst of circumstances have the monopoly on not > being selfish and being allowed to disagree with > gov't policy. > > If caring about my family's welfare makes me > selfish then I am guilty as charged. However, I > am not a single issue person as some would like to > think and the nasty judgements in some of the > comments here reek of cyber bullying. > > Thanks to Chippy Minton for the link. Well said!

amydown Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > But the article itself points out that the > statistics are only based on "conventional" > salarie, excluding self-employed people and > non-PAYE bonuses, etc. So, this "fact" doesn't > sound very representative. > > > > > LondonMix Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > This "fact" comes from the BBC amongst other > > sources... > > > > http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8151355.stm > > > > > > 50K is when you start to partially lose child > > benefit. You lose all of it at 60k. 45k makes > > you a top 10% earner. 42k was just an example > of > > why I think not looking at household income is > > unfair. Either way I would lose it but I think > > this element of the new rule penalises single > > parents and families that have a stay out home > > parent. > > > > > > > > ClareC Wrote: > > > -------------------------------------------------- > > > ----- > > > Does earning 42k a year really put you in the > > top > > > 10% earners in the country? Where did this > > "fact" > > > come from? > > > > > > A family living on 42k in London will be far > > from > > > wealthy whereas in other parts of the country > > 42k > > > would go much further. > > > > > > I don't think this has been thought through > > very > > > well, surely cost of living should be a > factor > > > too. I agree. And it's very out of date. 1% of a small proportion of the population sounds extremely unrepresentative. Edited to add, I too am in the category of those that will lose out. I don't have an issue with child benefit being means tested, I do however have an issue with Childcare not being tax deductible but that's another thread in itself! I also think anything that is means tested needs to be done fairly, ie taking into account the full picture. The method this is being done penalises single parents / earners and takes no consideration into regional variations for the cost of living.

Help with bath and bed time makes all the difference. I am extremely fortunate in that my partner works from so is pretty much always there. If doing alone I find putting the baby down first (whilst toddler is entertained with a DVD) works really well. I then sit with toddler for a bit and then put her to bed. I bought the mr Ben collection, Mr Men (80's version) and pink panther (80's version) and she loves them! We still have Peppa Pig, Fireman Sam and Bob the Builder on occasion too.

Does earning 42k a year really put you in the top 10% earners in the country? Where did this "fact" come from? A family living on 42k in London will be far from wealthy whereas in other parts of the country 42k would go much further. I don't think this has been thought through very well, surely cost of living should be a factor too.

We are working our way through This Life at the moment, scary to think its @ 16 years old now!! Have also worked through Cold Feet, Gavin and Stacy, The Inbetweeners, Morse, Dalgliesh and started Lewis! All very old school!

bonniebird Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > pommie Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > i agree with you bonniebird although dogs being > > left off the lead in the park is not > necessarily > > safe as they can attack other dogs too (as in a > > previous thread) > > > They can pommie and its one of my worst nightmares > :( but, an unsocialised un excersised dog can lead > to all sorts of problems and its not fair on those > of us and our dogs, who have taken the time to > choose a breed that suits there lifestyle, take > the dog training,socialisation classes, walk the > dog everyday, ideally twice offlead etc etc. I > wish that people would research the breeds, train > them, walk them, socialise them, I wish there was > a dog license to pay for dog wardens (who > understand dogs and actually like dogs)and I wish > that it was compulsary to attend The Kennel Club > Good Citizen Scheme, I wish people wouldn't buy > Huskies/Border Collies/Spaniels etc who are mean't > to be used for working and then not walk them at > all :( Dogs are so intelligent, beautiful and > loyal and we need to respect that. Unfortunately, > we live in a throw away society, if it don't work > out, dump it, starve it, use it as a breeding or > fighting machine. A well trained dog is a joy and > can totally enrich our lives, just a shame we > don't do them justice. Very well said :)

I second quiet time! If you can get them both to nap at the same time it makes a world of difference!

My eldest is just over 2 1/2, the younger one 16 months. I am in awe of the organised and relieved I'm not the only one that struggles! Being organised is def the key, I just don't manage it all the time! Getting clothes etc and bags sorted the night before makes a huge difference. Entertainment also key! We recently purchased a trampoline that is super safe and like a giant playpen, both kids love it and it allows me to hang out washing / mow lawn / feed animals etc. Just need an indoor one now ;)

I second a nanny making all the difference. I went back to work in Feb after 2 1/2 years off, our nanny started at 730 am and finished at 6 (my partner works from home). It really did make what would have been a stressful time very easy. I had a 15 mth age gap between my two, even with tax and NI, in ED a nanny was cheaper than 2x nursery. Good luck, it isn't an easy time but does get better x