Hickory

Sorry admin, this is meant to be for Family Discussion

Congratulations! It's hard work but worth it. With childcare, opinions are...well everyone has one. There is no 'best' method. What does your gut say?

Can anyone recommend anything I can read on dealing with the terrible 2s? We're hearing conflicting advice, from leaving them to tire themselves out to actually soothing them over. It's a minefield. What worked for you?

You can see through the slats if you put your face up close and really look through. By Summer, honeysuckle should have covered it. Or, you can go to the front of the house from the street, and see into their living room and even what they're watching on TV since they have no blinds. The neighbours are aged about 50, not that that should matter.

Thanks for the sound advice. The privacy issue can indeed be smoothed over by us growing climbers or adding gauze, which we said we'd do. Weirdly, this chap stands in his living room half naked with the lights on, so that's when the privacy point seems a little hypocritical. He's also very anti-gentrification so he might perceive that we're not the type of neighbour he was after. Maybe. I don't think they have a legal case for changing the fence. It is definitely ours, and the previous incarnation was less of a fence and more of a series of old wood and loose posts left behind. We thought we were doing a good thing. Jules, the twice weekly visits are just a froth of anger..repeating the same old thing about not liking it, not liking us or any of our gardeners (due to them not being British, grr). At some point, I think we have to stop engaging with them. I just never wanted to be one of those families who doesn't get on with their neighbours :(

I?m being kept awake at night with an issue with our neighbours. Can my friendly neighbours of SE22 please help in dispute resolution? We recently moved into a house near Lordship Lane. The garden fence which belongs to us (on the deeds) was broken and splintered quite badly, so not very safe for our little one. We had the chance to replace it quite quickly with a sturdy, cedar slatted design. It was of course, our cost to bear. Our mistake, but we only gave our adjoining neighbour a day?s notice that there would be a change. Since then they?re really making life hell for the 3 of us. She seemed like a nice lady but maybe we were wrong. They?re complaining every day that they don?t like the design. They don?t think it?s private (even though it?s the same height) They have no other rationale. Now we are receiving twice-weekly visits from a spluttering, angry, swearing neighbours. There?s also angry and threatening emails at night. We?re being stared at through the window as we take our daughter to nursery. Their music is suddenly being played loudly at 11pm. I don?t want to have a bad relationship that sours and sours. Yes, it wasn?t ideal we didn?t inform them. But we?ve said sorry many times, and hoped to move on. I?m starting to feel harassed by their constant anger towards us. We're not sure what technique to use going forward.

Thanks James. I think the issue is that the neighbours will flatly refuse any discussion to negotiate. This means we would then have to foot the bill for a surveyor. I was just wondering if there was any way all all we could engineer and design a way of *not* needing to have a Party Wall Agreement.

Can anyone help? We'd really like to remove the supporting wall that separates our front and back living room in SE22. It's your standard Victorian terrace. We have had a structural engineer come over and make calculations and drawings, which I don't fully understand. Unfortunately, the engineer is now AWOL so I'm stuck. They never answer calls or emails. Our neighbours are also quite hostile, and won't agree to the Party Structure Notice. I'm trying to understand if there's a way we can remove this wall by designing out the need for a party wall notice. Can the steel beam rest on existing bricks for example? There's no need to go below current foundations. In other words: we really want to remove the wall, but we need a way to avoid having to get a Party Structure Agreement. Please let me know if you've been in a similar position and what you did! **Admin, I know this is the wrong place but not sure where it should go**

Same DirtyBox. Two people didn't even show up despite seeming really keen over email.

Calsug, we had exactly the same dilemma. In the end we got it done as we were going to rip up the kitchen anyway. It felt like a lot of money, but it's become so useful for little ones and ageing parents/ grandparents who don't want to go upstairs. Technically you're meant to ask Transco to move the meter, but some CORGI engineers will do it for you. It costs about ?2k on top for Transco to come out..!! Yes Saniflos are more prone to breaking down, but it's not like you're going to be using this loo 10x a day. I would say do it.

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With one who's just turned 7, I promise it gets better!

3-8pm? So those who work full time will miss most of it?

I know there are various fireworks displays going on, but wondered if anywhere was doing a good old fashioned bonfire too? We took kids to Brockwell Park last year but to be honest, it was very overcrowded, rowdy and generally unpleasant.

A year ago I pondered this, but now as we think about selling, I'm racking my brains as to where in London we might go. Is there anywhere left that's affordable? We would love to stay in ED but it's gone waaaayyy too pricey for mere mortals. We earn normal salaries and want to upgrade from a 1 bed flat to a 3 bed little house. Isn't that a fairly ordinary aspiration? But I don't know of where that might be; unless we compromise hugely on neighbourhood safety and amenities. (My friend is in a similar position, albeit as a first time buyer. With a lucky deposit of ?60k, they're finding even Walthamstow is out of reach..!)