astrid83

10.30 is fine by me too!

Is 1 pm ok for everyone on Sunday?

Lovely to meet you all yesterday, I am already looking forward to the next one! For ladies due in June, Jenny and I were talking yesterday about having a meet-up at the Gardens Cafe near Peckham Rye this Sunday 24th March. Let me know if you want to come along and I'll call up and book a table.

I'm looking forward to see you all tomorrow! My bumb is a lot bigger now, I feel like I am expanding every day....which I probably am! :)

tortor - welcome to the thread and of course it is ok to join us on the 19th. Looking forward to meet you. I'm due my first on June 17th. We are meeting at EDT around 7pm on Tuesday 19th March Sofia x

I did it again. Posted with my other login (mrsS). I can do both weekend or evening, next weekend I'm free on the 24th of March...

Oh gosh that really is something to avoid! Having said that. My friend gave birth to her daughter in a hotel bathroom last year. She had been sent home from hospital 2 hours earlier as midwife thought it was going to be a slow process... She and her husband didn't fancy the long journey back home so checked in to the nearest hotel as they were booked in for an induction next morning. All of a sudden she got strong contractions, asked her husband to have a look and he could see the baby's head! So...he delivered his own baby.:)

Thank you for booking it Jenny! I'm up for a smaller meet-up with the June babies too.

So which other venues could we go to? Will the Clockhouse be open on the 19th? But I have no idea about the food there... How about The Actress on Bellenden Rd?

Hi ladies, I've not been feeling great but am hopefully on the mend now. We've been talking about a second meetup on the 19th of March - how's that for all of you? Are you happy to meet up at East Dulwich Tavern like last time or shall we go somewhere else? Also...I have just booked and pay for NCT-classes, finally, starting in May at The Old Nun's Head. Anyone else doing the same one?

Budur, well exactly! That's why I am happy to see that people like you are doing the right thing. The Au Pair role is not easy. Most of the girls who come over are quite young, it might be their first time away from home, in a new country with a new language and multiple culture crashes. It's very important that they are made to feel welcome.

Regards to gym membership and oyster card - I had friends who's gym membership was payed for but I don't think that is very common. Not sure though. Regarding travel money, is your Au Pair likely to use public transport when she is looking after the kids? In that case, yes, travel should be covered by you. If it's only for her own use outside working hours then it's up to you really. I got my pocket money and that was that, nothing more but I don't think there are any general rules about these things.

I first came to England from Sweden in 2002, and worked as an Au pair in two different families. It sounds like your future Au pair will be treated very well by you, which of course is very important. I had less luck and found the whole experience quite miserable. And I can't imagine how I survived on ?60/week, of course food was free and I did not have to pay for accommodation but I wasn't made to feel very welcome outside working hours so I would end up walking to the corner shop, buy food and eat it in my bedroom. Might sound a bit bonkers but I was not allowed in the kitchen after 7pm, which is when I finished my working day so I had no choice really. Fortunately I am a bit more mature now and would not allow to be treated in that way, but it's hard when you are in a new country, away from your family and friends. So all I am saying, whoever you choose to employ will be very lucky and will hopefully have a good time looking after your children! I remember doing a language course in Crystal Palace during my first year here, I payed for it myself though, can't remember how much.

I got the feeling that the psychiatrist at King's was quite inexperienced, or maybe I'm wrong here but she did not seem very unsure about what to do. She asked me a couple of questions but she did not give me a questionnaire. I think I know what questionnaire you mean though, having done several in the past. I have not spoken to my midwife again as I feel like there is not much more she can do, she said that I will hopefully get to see the perinatal team at the end of next week. I will call her tomorrow though. This might sound odd but I don't think I 'd want to do any therapy or CBT without medication at this stage. I'm scared that the feelings will be too raw to handle, and especially with CBT as that can be very 'pushy' in my experience. The last CBT I had was at the Maudsley's for post traumatic stress disorder (caused by having been in a abusive relationship in my early 20s) and I do not agree that CBT should be used for things like that, it's just too traumatic. One a positive note though...the dark thoughts are still there as well as the anxiety, but some of the things I'm doing seem to help. Thank you so much for all your support, you have no idea how much it is helping me at the moment.

Sorry that last post was from me, got two different usernames....

Hi ladies, I'd definitely be up for meeting again, it was lovely to meet you all. I'm struggling a bit at the moment with pregnancy hormones affecting my mood so arranging another meet-up will help to lift my mood a bit. I'm happy to arrange something. Does weeknights work best for you all? I guess we could also try to do a Saturday/Sunday morning in a caf? somewhere if you fancy?

Heavy period pains are awful. I've had them since I was 15 and really feel for you. I've had to cancel stuff, call in sick to work, been picked up by husband in the car as I've been in too much pain to even stand up. Also get headaches, diarrhea and nausea because of the pain. The one thing that works for me is to start taking ibuprofen few days before my period is due. So if my period is due on a Friday I might start taking pain killers on a Wednesday. It takes that horrific shocking onset of period cramps away. And I actually avoid exercising around when my period is due as that seems to make it worse. My husband also got fed up with picking me up from Peckham Rye Park where I'd lie screaming on the ground due to period cramps starting during a morning run. Hope you get some help, you really shouldn't have to suffer like this!

Lovely to meet everyone today, although I didn't get a chance to speak to all of you! We should do it again soon. Thanks so much again for organizing it Ginny. Sofia x

Sals12 - ha, yes - Astrid is actually my cat! Just a random pick when having to chose username... Sofia x

Thanks Ginny that is great! Looking forward to meet you all tomorrow. I'll aim for 7pm as well. Sofia x

Hi Elizabeth and congratulations! I'm sorry to hear that you can't make it on the 19th but I am sure there will be more meet-ups to come!

Appeal the decision. I used to work as a mental health advocate in Bromley and there was a guy who worked together with Mind to help people with appeals. Don't think he covers Southwark but if you contact the local Mind they should be able to help you... I know lots of people who have been judged wrongly as fit for work. You are not alone, try not to panic about it.

I'd too suggest using Honor Oak Park instead of Peckham Rye. I live very near Harris Girls and every time I get the idea to go from Peckham Rye I always regret it, there is just too much traffic! Honor oak station is a 15 min walk away - or you could get the bus 343 to New Cross Gate which takes about 7 min.

So exciting with so many summer babies! I'm definitely showing now and am looking forward to meet you all on the 19th :)

I am so terribly sorry Clofy, and I know no words would make a difference. Just so sorry.