BlueOne

Have none of you heard of 'Dishy Dads"?

It seems to me that those people vehemently in favour of unconditional child freedom in public places are also demanding unconditional acceptance of *their* right(and by extension their childrens) to live and behave in the way they wish without any consideration of the needs, rights or preferences of those around them. I don't mean all parents of young children by any means, but the vocal "We will do as we wish, and damn any member of the community whom this may inconvenience" group. Conversely,they seem to not ackowledge that the "against" group also has a right to live the way *they* think is appropriate,and this might include being uncomfortable or plain old unhappy with the behaviour of people with whom they share their neighbourhood, streets, shops and pubs, and that includes well-heeled mothers and their children. We live in an urban environment, and as such will find ourselves rubbing up against all sorts who have different lifestyles, behavioural habits and values to our own. I have certainly been at the wrong end of "attitude" in ED from women who seem to think they are the lady of the manor in some posh market town, and whom would receive a very different response than my baffled shock if they tried the same attitude in less gentrified parts of London. There are all sorts of anti-social behaviour, not all enacted by youths in hoods. Matt has an equal right to want to live the way he chooses in his community, just as the affluent mums have the right to want to live in their way. Unfortunately balancing everyone's rights means that compromises need to be made by all of us, not aggressive total repudiation of someone's right to an opinion that differs from your own, as I have seen in some responses to Matt's post today. So maybe we child-free should spare a thought for the parents with their hands full on our streets on the weekends, be more patient and smile. Slow down. Maybe the mums should think about doing shopping at less peak times when the child-free are out of East Dulwich (thats pretty much 8am - 6.30pm Mon-Fri). If the child-free can handle kids in the pub, then maybe the parents can try to control the kids - but if the kids are uncontrolable in that environment, is it fair to bring them in the first place? And finally, for eveyone's sake, in the evenings let's leave pubs for all adults regardless of breeding status.

Wow! Hostile reception for Matt there. Bit of a hard core response to someone expressing an opinion? The response to Matt seems to be - "if you don't like it leave the area", but let's be balanced here - he is expressing his view and the child-lobby are expressing theirs. I don't think Matt called for all baby owners to leave the area? Personally , although not a parent I love babies and children. It really puts a smile on my face to see young families out and about, enjoying themselves in the park and the playgrounds. But at risk of begin commanded to leave the area, I do agree with Matt to some extent. Surely it;'s about appropriateness and boundaries? Some places exist to cater for the needs of children, and others are for adults. I don't go into the middle of the kiddies playground, or the city farm, or sit on the swings with my fags and pint - and I'd be run out if not arrested if I did - and yet parents are outraged that an adult might want to pursue adult pursuits an an adult environment in the evening after a hard days' work and probably stressful commute. I appreciate that it must be nice for mums to congregate in local pubs for a catch-up and to let their kids play together. I know it's not easy being a stay at home mother, but working 40+ hours a week is not much fun either. Surely the childless have rights too? I'd like to think it fair to hope that in the evening, pubs might be left to the adults?

This site gives demographic snapshots of your local area (amongst other stuff) quite interesting... http://www.upmystreet.com/local/my-neighbours/neighbourhood-profile/l/se22+8jz.html

Hi there! I only discovered the forum a couple of months ago and have been lurking shyly ever since, but I just checked out the forum drinks pics in the Lounge and I have to say I am tempted to come along next time - you look like a fun bunch! Blue