Axeman

You've lost me. Who's "Mike"?

[quote=Please! I have truly had my heart cleft in twain by your fearsome words Blub] Very well, *Bob*. Just so as you don't feel left-out. I sincerely apologize for any offense that I didn't cause you. Happy?

Perhaps I didn't make myself clear, Narnia. I don't find the whole concept false, as I'm sure the positive outweighs the negative. It's just that on the forums I've used before, there seemed to be an atmosphere of agreeing with someone simply so that they didn't offend them or rock the boat. That's all.

No. As far as I'm aware, you didn't feature in yesterdays exchange. Unless you were caught in the crossfire, that is.

[quote=Cheery Sean I stand by what I said yesterday ? you are a troublemaker and will serve no purpose on this forum other than to upset people before your inevitable banishment] I pity your short-sightedness. All I've done is made myself clear. All you have done is continue a feeling of ill-will.

Fair enough. Woof, I apologize to you aswell for insinuating that your charitable effort was false.

I'd work on your delivery, dita-on-tees.

I did apoligize, DJDramaQueen. But if it makes you feel any better, I'll repeat myself with more focus. Georgia and Ladymuck, I apologize for any undeserved hurt I caused you on the drinks thread. Please accept my humble apologies on this matter.

I carry an axe. And I'll swing it without prejudice.

Now, after reading some of the comments following my own on Georgia's drinks thread, it's become rather apparent that I was perhaps unnecessarily rude, or, indeed cruel, in some of my overly robust observations. So, as a consequence I'm happy to take a step back on this occasion and offer my apologies if I've made any lips wobble. I was merely surprised that members of this message board would be so pre-emptive in attending a social occasion attended by possibly dangerous or unsavoury strangers. And I sincerely hope you take that into account before you book the babysitter. SeanMacGabhan, Yesterdays childish temper-tantrum was completely uncalled for. You let yourself down, sir. I'm fully entitled to my opinion, as are you. And I hope you'll respect mine, as I will yours. That aside. Let me assure you that I'm not a previously banned user masquerading as another, as you implied. I was directed to this forum by a friend of mine who is a regular user, and has been for some years, so I'm told. Now, the rest of you. Some of you may think I'm brash and cutting. Well, that's tough. I simply don't have the energy or patience to indulge in the facade of goodwill that exists among these curious online communities. I find it false, and amongst all things I detest insincerity. So I suggest you all see me as your new Chief Whip because I like to put the stick about when I encounter impudence or insubordination. And for anyone who wants to tangle with me, beware. It won't take me long to meet your measure. But that's not to say that I shall be intentionally hostile. No, just that I'll fight fire with fire if the occasion arises. As I'm sure you will too. So, let's put yesterday behind us. And here's to a colourful future. Now, you'll have to excuse me. For I have to return some video tapes.

THere's no need for that sort of language, young man.

Breaking into someone's house is a long way from raiding the fridge of a communal kitchen, Narnia, you idiot. Stuff gets nicked from halls of residence kitchens. And it always will. Deal with it.

I'm not commenting on any charitable effort. I'm commenting the pitiful nature of this thread. Which appears to be a by proxy plea for attention on behalf of someone who, judging by the erratic and incomprehensible posts, clearly has learning difficulties. Oh, and this raffle is a bit false seeing as the prize goes to whoever the organizer likes the most. But I imagine you all know this, but don't want to say it, to avoid shattering the transparent illusion of goodwill towards people you've never met. How pathetic.

Is it any of my business, lady muck? No, not really. I was just trying to determine whether you are one of Georgia's genuine friends, or just one of the unfortunate consequences of a blanket invitation. But ask yourself this. How hollow and insincere are these no doubt awkward occasions? Is it a vibrant group of liberal, left-wing individuals engaged in sparkling discussion. Or a group of mismatched old Loners who, apart from contributing to an online forum, have nothing in common. I bet the conversation dips to an embarressing, empty silence more than you'd like to admit. And do these fellow posters actually become real friends, or after the event, do they just melt back into an indifferent crowd of faces, desperately trying to avoid eye contact if they see an online 'friend', wishing they'd never met. And what would you talk about if one of you stopped posting on the forum? Not alot, probably.

Well, are the two of you *sleeping* together? Which, quite frankly, would explain the suspect praise and attention. Or do you just pity the poor soul you're trying to promote? I'd hazard a guess that it's both.

Would you be one of those offline 'friends', Ladymuck?

Are the two of you shagging, or what?

This old chesnut. Before making accusations, my advice to you, Narnia, would be to locate the communal weed-stash and telltale dirty cutlery. Tell me, was by any chance the news of the stolen food followed by a request for cash to replace the supposedly stolen food? If it wasn't, then your son clearly has alot to learn.

Isn't anonymity the point of an online forum? Honestly, what a bizarre and depressing concept. I think that this Georgia should try making some 'real', offline friends.

About a year old. Give-or-take a month.

What a horrible, unfounded accusation. I go out of my way to inform you all of the possibility that a child is the being used as a guinea pig for a what could be an irreparable experiment, and you brush it off as fantasy. Did it ever occur to you that my first thread was perhaps written by a less well meaning soul, such as a teenage son who accessed my account? And to think that some of you call yourselves 'mothers'. Honestly, I genuinely pity any children under your care.

Hello, I've posted this in the family discussion section of the forum. But I would also like to hear the opinion of people who perhaps don't have children. I don't mean any offense, but this section does seem more like a free-for-all, thus a more broader audience. I'm not really sure how explain what I saw this morning, but something tells me, as a parent, that it's abhorrently wrong and completely unacceptable in western culture. I was on the 185 this morning travelling into town, when a young mother - mid 30s - boarded the bus and stood next to me. I didn't notice at first, but when I looked at the child in the buggy, my attention was immediately drawn to it's fingers; which were bound in a ribbon or lace like material. I couldn't quite decide what to make of it at first, as I naturally assumed that the child must have suffered some kind of injury to their fingers. But after some further thought on the matter, I concluded that if the child had suffered an injury to their fingers, then they would be bound by bandages. Without trying to arouse any suspicion, I asked the mother what the purpose of the binding was. At first I thought she would be rather guarded about answering the questions of a stranger that concerned her child. But no, she was quite happy to share. It turns out that she and her husband are friends of a family who have returned from some kind of extended holiday in central Asia. And during their travels, they came into contact with nomads that practiced Shamanism. It turns out, that in this region of Asia, to prevent small children from sucking their fingers and thumbs, they bind their fingers in sterilized linen. She also went on to say that she wasn't the only mother to use this preventative measure in East Dulwich and its environs. I wasn't about to start lecturing her on how to be a parent, but something inside my said that this was wrong. So, that's why I'm recounting this on here. Is it illegal, but more importantly, does it cause lasting damage? Either way, the child looked rather glum.

Hello, I'm not really sure how explain what I saw this morning, but something tells me, as a parent, that it's abhorrently wrong and completely unacceptable in western culture. I was on the 185 this morning travelling into town, when a young mother - mid 30s - boarded the bus and stood next to me. I didn't notice at first, but when I looked at the child in the buggy, my attention was immediately drawn to it's fingers; which were bound in a ribbon or lace like material. I couldn't quite decide what to make of it at first, as I naturally assumed that the child must have suffered some kind of injury to their fingers. But after some further thought on the matter, I concluded that if the child had suffered an injury to their fingers, then they would be bound by bandages. Without trying to arouse any suspicion, I asked the mother what the purpose of the binding was. At first I thought she would be rather guarded about answering the questions of a stranger that concerned her child. But no, she was quite happy to share. It turns out that she and her husband are friends of a family who have returned from some kind of extended holiday in central Asia. And during their travels, they came into contact with nomads that practiced Shamanism. It turns out, that in this region of Asia, to prevent small children from sucking their fingers and thumbs, they bind their fingers in sterilized linen. She also went on to say that she wasn't the only mother to use this preventative measure in East Dulwich and its environs. I wasn't about to start lecturing her on how to be a parent, but something inside my said that this was wrong. So, that's why I'm recounting this on here. Is it illegal, but more importantly, does it cause lasting damage? Either way, the child looked rather glum.

I understand that in todays financial climate we're all having to consume cheese that we previously thought beneath us, but I'm afraid I can't comment on such an inferior product. I'm not saying that I think I'm better that you in any way. It's just that, well, let's just say that I wouldn't let you use my toilet. [quote=Jah Lush: Do you sneer at people who eat Dairylea triangles Axeman? I know I do. Shocking isn't it. But one can't help those who won't help themselves. Poor misguided fools. ] These 'people' you describe should have their ears boxed.

It's now a widely accepted concept that cheese has become the new common ground spanning the class divide. Cheese has always been among us, but it was only until recently that the middle classes began promoting cheese and in the process it inadvertently became a social medium; forging class acceptance in a way that locally sourced produce, music festivals and package holidays could only dream of. It's universally held that smelly cheeses were the ostentatious reserve of upwardly mobile, middle income society. Now it's a different story after the big chain supermarkets got in on the act and made the wheels and wedges of the foreign, multi-coloured alternatives available to the chattering classes. But the real explosion of interest in cheese was undeniably fueled by the Daily Mail during the early '90s when it started offering its easily lead readers the opportunity to travel to France for a pound each way. Fully exposing the ignorant, tar-handed peasants to the socially ascending dairy product. These new pilgrims to the birthplace of poncy cheese started brushing shoulders with their wealthier - chinless - contemporaries, when visiting the rustic dairies/shrines that churn the stuff. Forcing both tribes to endure each other to the point of enlightened acceptance of each others equally peculiar, ghastly and occasionally pleasant habits. The result? The re-birth of a harmonious society, enamored with each others fads and foibles. No longer preoccupied with social insecurity when in the company of either higher or lower earners. Eager to enjoy and participate in whatever capacity their broader acceptance of each others customs and values can accomodate. Why, only last week I observed a Guardianista pouring over a copy of Horse and Hound. The following day I spied a bricklayer wistfully engrossed in Proust. I even thought this utopia was being cruelly paradied when I heard a removals man arranging a social event on his newly aquired iphone. Instead of asking his friend if he wanted an evening of drinking and racially motivated violence, he rather casually inquired: "Du Pain, Du Vain, Du Boursin?". Naturally I was overwhelmed at this blue-collared specimens' inspiring example of social progression. But we mustn't forget that with any change, comes a dark side. And in this case, it come in the form of the cheese conciet. Even in todays cheese influenced society, one would be foolish to assume that cheese will rid the world of all its ills. But the most pressing priority that demands Parliament's attention is the threat of cheese envy fueled by concieted consumers. Humans are naturally competitive beings. Indeed, it's part of our survival programming. So it's natural, when producing the much vaunted cheese board, that we want to impress our guests with superior cheese. But we mustn't lower ourselves to mocking what we regard as inferior cheese. That's bullying. And that will threaten all the hard work cheese has done to bring us, as a nation, closer together. For example, last week I was visiting a friend who earns less money than I do, but we never let that get between us, and her daughter came through the front door in tears. On inquiring the reason behind her upset she told us, and I quote: "Alison and Emily were saying that mum and dad are bad parents because they can only afford Austrian Smoked. And that they're gonna tell social services!" We calmed the child with a Babybel as it dawned on us that cheese was now being used as a weapon. Stunned by the fact that cheese had serruptitiously become a part of our lives to the extent that we depended on it more than it depended on us, sort of. But what can we do to stop cheese overwhelming us to the extent that we can no longer rely on its presence to differentiate which other families' children we would prefer our children to play with? No offense, but I don't want any of my children asking if those kids from down the road who eat Iceland Cheddar can come round to play. They might steal something.