Tracy551162

GinaG3. Are you going to the forum drinks thing in the Mag tomorrow night at 19:30. There is another post called family room drinks or something. Lots of people seem to be going, so a good opportunity to meet new people. I am planning to go. There is a space reserved in the name of Heidi. lubcA thanks for the Small Saints info, will definitely check it out.

Hi, I am pretty new to this forum lark (despite having a 3.5 and 1 year old - I think I was temporarily insane after the birth of my first so never went on the forum, oh the regret, oh the stoopidity). Anyway, I would love to come along and meet some new people, so long as I'm not a fraud just diving on in then bottoms up for me. Snowboarder, your very user name fills me with happy memories, have you been of late having baby/babies/toddlers and all. Sob, I miss it.

GinaG3, what a great post. So brave and articulate just like the other posters say. I was just looking around the forum for this sort of post as I find playgroups painful. I'm always looking around desperate to befriend anyone and have a proper chat, rather than building yet another tower and doing another puzzle with no adult conversation. I always think most people have made their baby friends when their children were younger. I did too but people are often working on my days off or have family around etc.. I was thinking how great it would be to just post asking for people for a play date, but I chicken out mostly. I find at play groups you end up having the odd word here and there but I find it never really develops into anything more than the odd chit chat, rather than becoming more of a friendship - partly no doubt due to fear of being perceived as desperate. It's very hard to make friends particularly when you are thrown together with a group of people you don't even know if you have anything in common with (apart from children obviously), and as most people are probably in their thirties and above, I can see how you would have felt alienated. I love my two boys to bits but it can get quite lonely sometimes spending all day alone with them. lucyA - What age group is Small Saints for? I go to the Conker Club on Monday mornings at All Saints in West Dulwich. My boys are 3.5 and 1 and I know some groups only go up to 18 months or 2.

Hi, what's a "free" school? I've heard mention of this before. Thanks.

???? - although the MIL might not always be to blame, it is the DIL who has had the baby and so could be suffering from all sorts of emotions, depression, anxiety. On top of this there are sleepless nights and endless worry. Therefore the MIL should show patience and understanding during what could be a very tough time for the DIL, so they ought to act grown up and put the DIL and her son first, rather than add to the stress with sometimes sulky demands. womanofdulwich - great suggestion! An all round winner.

Sorry to hear about your troubles Gussy. Sounds just awful. I am so sick of hearing about MILs who should be supporting their children/children in law at a time of having had babies, but it seems that so many just interfere and put on pressure. After having children you need support and the MIL should be there for you and your husband when you decide you need it, not barging in and taking over and being selfish and pressurising you. MILs so often act like spoiled children getting jealous and feeling left out or this that and the other. It's time for them to grow up and respect their children. They are the parents too after all and should do anything to help. I would first find out where your husband stands. Although I agree with the other posters' suggestions of setting boundaries and telling her how it has to be, I think if you do this without first talking to your husband it may cause more upset. You and your husband need to be agreed at what has to happen and you can only sort MIL out if you stick together and don't allow MIL to play you off against one another. if MIL sees that her son is in agreement with you she will have to tow the line and respect your wishes. Remember that your sanity and the wellbeing of your marriage and your children is infinitely more important than possibly offending her. If you've bitten your tongue for over two years, she may not even know how bad it is for you and she thinks hse can get away with murder. So you need to sort her out and tell her what the limits are. Do it sooner rather than later. Counselling will hopefully help in some way, but I think it's unfair that you have to go to that length becasue of her unreasonable behaviour. Good luck.

The Anchor and Hope is usually very busy on a Thurs/Fri night though, but it's a cosy place where you just squeeze yourself in to the gaps and randomly arranged stools and tables. The food is great. The tapas place on the opposite side of the road is called Meson Don Felipe. It's great. I know I know, back to Gastro pubs.... :)-D

Thanks for the suggestions. I'll certainly give them a go. It's also nice to see that people have a similar opinion as me on the Rosendale. I secretly hoped it would fail but that's not looking likely! :-) i like the Hope and Anchor (Anchor and Hope) on The Cut SE1. Great food but a good flakey round the edges pub part.

I live 10 paces from the Rosendale and was thoroughly dissappointed when it reopened. It's just a restaurant as far as I'm concerned. I have eaten there and the food and service are very good, but the menu is lacking in my opinion and whenever I scan it it's just not right. It's just a bit too poncey (I've eaten in lots of micheling restaurants in case anyone recons I'm not into food - poncey or otherwise). They know they make their money from food so whenever I walk in someone runs over to ask if I'm eating or drinking, they then point out all the empty tables available - erm, I'm sure I can see that for myself. I go to the bar to look at a menu and before I can pick it up someone has rushed over to pick it up for me. Wonder what would happen if they saw me about to scratch my arse.... Anyway the point is that The Rosendale needs to be either a restaurant or a pub. If it was a restaurant it would be fine, but it touts itself as a pub too, but everytime I try it in its pub guise I am left disappointed. There are no snacks, or small nibbley dishes or finger food, not even any crisps (huge mark up on those!) which would be nice with a pint. The decor is just not pubby at all. I feel like I'm in a show home living room. A pub should be somewhere you feel you can relax a bit, that's a bit rougher round the edges, but even when just having a pint I feel I need to sit up straight. A shame that I still don't have a decent local. I am bored of Gastro pubs, they are everywhere and think it's a shame that there are no decent pubs in the area. Don't mean old mans pubs but more trad pubs like The Crown and Greyhound, by far the best place in SE London. I also like the EDT in East Dulwich and the COmmercial is good too. Please enlighten me where the others are!!