Knomester

Stina - Where did you go to weigh your baby? I haven't had Baby Nnomester weighed for over 6 weeks because I can't bear the wait at the Forest Hill Road clinic on a Wednesday (or the unhelpful HVs...). Would like to take him somewhere else this week to check how he's getting on.

Lovely forumites...a little question I can't seem to find an answer to in any of the other threads on pushchairs.... For Christmas my mother-in-law is kindly buying us a second buggy for the car, holidays, flights, etc and to last us as Baby Knomester gets to big for his pram (we have a very good but rather large Britax B-Smart with carrycot). I've had a quick look at the Maclaren range which everyone seems to be a fan of and just wondered whether, with experience, you would go for the XT or the XLR (the main differences I can see are that the XLR is slightly bigger, heavier and comes with foot muff included)....? Thank you!

I agree with Saffron - Oakwood Midwives attached to the Forest Hill Road Group Practice are excellent. Incredibly supportive throughout my pregnancy and for a month after I gave birth (which they had no obligation to do...). I did previously like the surgery too but have had some bad experiences since Baby Knomester was born. I now have a list of my preferred GPs at the surgery who I wait to see unless it's an emergency.

We have the Angel Care Sound Monitor (just the sound one, not the one that has the movement detector) and have had no problems with it whatsoever. It has adjustable sensitivity so you can have it set to pick up all noise or, as I do, the setting below that where it jsut picks up shouts, crying, yelps, etc, but not little sleepy noises or mutterings. It has a nightlight (which we don't use) and a temperature guage which is the thing I find the most useful so that I don't sit panicking about whether he's too hot / too cold. It also has a long range which I'm hoping will come in handy next Spring / Summer when we take to eating outside again! To be honest though, they can be addictive and stop you from relaxing. You definitely need one, don't get me wrong, and in the early days you'll have it on but probably still go in to check (I know I did when he started going to be before us), but as time has gone on I've started trusting my own hearing a bit more (he's 11 weeks now). I don't need to hear every little noise as it makes me jump with a start each time - I just need to know if he needs me which is usually made loud and clear with a big shout or cry which I can hear without the monitor.

Saffron - I've read about Reynaud's (sometime during my hazy desperate search to find out what on earth was going wrong with our breastfeeding...) and wondered abot it because I also get a whitening of my nipples after feeds, particularly if Baby Knomester does a long feed. But I don't (at the moment) seem to have any of the other symptoms. It sounds like you really went through the mill with it all... Amazing that you persevered so long! Great that you were supported by HV and GP too. I really wish I had seen a GP at the outset who knew something about breastfeeding issues - the first 2 I saw had never seen breast thrush or oral thrush in a baby. They didn't want to look in Baby Knomester's mouth and only treated us both because I insisted. I just wish I'd been even more forceful than I was (easy to say, but not so easy to do when you're tired, emotional and in a lot of pain!).

I was surprised about how little of what we consume makes it through to our breastmilk... Like littleEDfamily I will have a beer if I'm out for lunch at the weekend (often whilst feeding) and will have a beer or two or a couple of small glasses of wine after baby Knomester has gone to bed in the evening so that by the time I feed him again around 3am or 4am I doubt there'd be much left in my system.

Thanks for all the lovely supportive replies :-) I didn't realise I might have been given antibiotics when I had my c-section. Noone told me and to be honest I wouldn't have thought of checking my notes (in my delirious state!) for something like that. If I'd known I could have, like Buggles said, taken preventative measures as I am prone to thrush when taking antibiotics normally... Another lesson learnt! Countjc - It sounds like you went through hell. I'm amazed how well you did but really sorry to hear about the potentially permanent damage...

Hear Hear Alieh!

We have swaddled Baby Knomester since he was born and he too is a little wriggler who can escape from any swaddle, but we found it helps him to nod off. He had a v strong Moro reflex so would wake himself up constantly at first. He's 11 weeks now and we're still swaddling him for night, although not for daytime naps. During the say we started swaddling with one arm out one nap a day and then both arms, finally progressing to tucking a blanket firmly under his arms over his legs. We've yet to take the plunge and progress from swaddling to a grobag at night - maybe this weekend!

Thanks Gussy :-) I agree that antenatal classes are weighted far too heavily towards labour and the breastfeeding classes I attended sadly didn't cover any of the issues we've faced.

Flucanazole isn't licensed for BF women as far as I'm aware, but as I understand it, it is licensed for babies and the amount that passes into your breastmilk is less than the amount licensed to give directly to babies. My GPs wouldn't prescribe the amounts needed at first so I bought a flucanazole (oral thrush tablet) over the counter as my loading dose until I could get to see another GP. I also cut out sugar, booze, wheat etc (as far as possible) for a while anna_r - I'm not sure what difference it made, but I felt I was doing something! As a friend said last week, if you followed the diet 100% you would ended up suffering from severe malnutrition! I also took strong acidophulis (sp?) suitable for BF mums and was on painkillers (diclofenac and paracetamol) until a couple of weeks ago.

Thanks Fuschia - very sweet of you to say so! I am sure there are other mums who have it much worse and might not have had the support (or tenacity...!) to get the right help. I'm just sad that I haven't found BF an enjoyable or bonding experience...

Hi Gina I forgot to add to my post that the BF Cafe in Peckham is the best one to go to if you're having problems as it seems that you're the only ones to pick up on the tongue tie problems! I've been to see you all there a couple of times and made to feel very welcome and supported. It turns out that it is more than likely that both me and my mum also had tongue ties - my Granny struggled to feed my mum and my mum struggled to feed me (but not her other 3 babies). Both my mum and I have had problems with our jaws all our lives (operations for both of us) which Clare Kedves says is a sure sign of a tongue tie. I'm hoping to take Baby Knomester to see an osteopath soon as he seems to struggle with opening his mouth wide enough to get a good latch now...

I love your dedication to the Christmas tree Moos!!! We have two trees normally (I know - totally over the top but we love it!) which our cat likes to take a swipe at. This will be our first year with a baby, but he's too small to cause any mischief so making the most of the two trees before scaling back next year...

Sorry to hear you haven't got the appointment yet Moos - I do hope you get an appointment next week as I know all too well how difficult the wait can be... I've finally finished writing up all the bits of info I've gleaned from our experience over the past 11 weeks here - hopefully some of it will help: http://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/forum/read.php?29,570543

A friend who has a 5 month old baby recently told me that if she decided to have a second child it wouldn't be the thought of labour that daunted her but the first few weeks of breastfeeding and, even after a horrid labour and emergency c-section, I'm inclined to agree :-) Baby Knomester and I haven't had the easiest of starts when it comes to feeding and we're still not out of the woods after 11 weeks, but we've learnt a few things along the way which I thought might be of use to other new mums facing similar problems with breastfeeding. We've had to battle to get the treatment we need and to see the 'right' people, but we're here to tell the tale and still (for the time being at least) exclusively breastfeeding! 1. Pain during and after breastfeeding If you have pain when you're breastfeeding it might not just be because baby isn't latched on right, there are other reasons and sadly, for some mums breastfeeding isn?t pain-free. Time and time again we're told that if it hurts you're doing something wrong - usually that the latch isn't right - but it just isn't true. There seems to be a wall of silence about the problems women face when breastfeeding which is incredibly sad... We choose to breastfeed because we think it's best for our babies, but it's not easy for many women and sadly we feel like it's our fault or we're doing something wrong when we encounter problems. Of course checking you?ve got a good latch is the starting point and it?s not an easy thing to master for some mums and babies, but (despite what all the books, midwives and health visitors seem to tell you) there can be other reasons for the pain. We were seen by at least 5 different midwives, BF counsellors, etc and told that Baby Knomester's latch was absolutely fine, but still I was in absolute agony at each feed and cried through all our feeds (not just the first 20 seconds!) for weeks until I left a tearful message for Clare Kedves at King?s who saw me the next day. My pain was caused by a few things: Baby Knomester had a posterior tongue tie (not picked up until 5 weeks), I had open wounds on my nipples (probably caused by the tongue tie), I had a staphyloccocus aureous infection (bacterial) on the wounds and I had thrush which had progressed to my milk ducts. Sadly, all of these seem to be fairly common, but accessing the right information, finding GPs who could properly diagnose and getting the correct treatment can be seriously hard work. 2. Tongue Tie A tongue tie is where baby?s tongue is attached to the bottom of his/her mouth by a membrane. Not all tongue ties cause problems with breastfeeding, but even a posterior tongue tie (where it?s just attached a little at the base of the tongue) can cause untold pain and nipple damage to mum and can mean that baby has difficulty feeding. There are a couple of good photos and explanation about the symptoms on this website which helped me decide that Baby Knomester may have a posterior tongue tie: http://www.tonguetie.co.uk/ There are some excellent threads on tongue tie with lots of mums? experiences on the forum. The most recent one started by Moos is here: http://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/forum/read.php?29,568323 Sadly King?s don?t check for tongue tie as a matter of course when babies are born. I know what to look out for next time (if there ever is a next time?!) but I?d suggest that if you or baby have any of the symptoms that you call Clare Kedves at King?s (she works on Tuesdays and Wednesdays but you can leave a message any day for her to pick up when she?s at King?s on a Tuesday) and ask her to check. The procedure to release the tongue tie is very simple (and not traumatic for baby) and carried out by Dr Patel up at King?s. Afterwards you will have to breastfeed every 3 hours day and night for 5 days and massage under baby?s tongue ? please please please make sure you do this as baby?s tongue tie can grow back (as Baby Knomester?s is doing ? we?re back on massaging several times a day 6 weeks on). The earlier a tongue tie is picked up the less trauma for both mum and baby so please don?t worry if you think you?re wasting people?s time or being a pain (like I did). I was made to feel like a neurotic, over-panicking mum by several GPs, but luckily my midwives kept me on for a month and were incredibly supportive. But sadly, I do feel like my first few precious weeks with Baby Knomester were seriously marred by the undiagnosed tongue tie and resulting problems? 3. Thrush - Diagnosis Oral thrush in babies and thrush on mum's nipples / in mum?s milk ducts is, from what I can tell, fairly common and difficult to get rid of. Added to that, many GPs (I've seen 5 different GPs about it as well as the wonderful team up at King?s) don?t seem to (a) recognise it or (b) know how to treat it properly. We self diagnosed ourselves with thrush when Baby Knomester was about 10 days old after reading lots on the internet and chatting to other mums with experience of it. Sadly the first 2 GPs I saw refused to diagnose thrush and wouldn?t give us the medication we needed. The 3rd GP (at the same surgery) eventually prescribed what I asked for after I made a verbal complaint about the previous 2 GPs I?d seen. The problem with oral thrush in babies is that it can be almost symptom free and therefore difficult to diagnose. There may be white patches on baby?s tongue or in baby?s mouth, but baby may just have a white tongue ? a bit like it looks straight after a feed when there is milk residue in baby?s mouth. Apparently many moons ago it used to be known simply as ?white mouth? which makes sense. In mums symptoms can be more severe. Look out for flaky or red, or shiny skin on nipples (although I had none of these first time round) and deep stabbing pains from the nipple area into the breast ? like someone sticking big needles into your breasts. The pain is constant and isn?t just there during feeds. Whatever you do, don?t just ignore it as it can get worse very quickly. I was daft enough to wait over a weekend to see a GP instead of calling Seldoc ? a mistake I wouldn?t make again! 4. Thrush ? Treatment The best advice I found was from the Breastfeeding Network: http://www.breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk/pdfs/BfN_Thrush_leaflet_Feb_2009.pdf In short, to be sure that you get rid of thrush (based on this advice and that offered by King?s and Clare Kedves) I found that you need to do the following: - treat both mum and baby simultaneously (or you?ll pass it between you) - apply daktarin cream (micanazole 2%) to nipples after each feed - apply daktarin gel (micanazole) to baby?s mouth after each feed - mum to take flucanazole ? loading dose of 150mg-300mg on day 1 and then 100mg twice a day for 10 days - sterilise muslins, dummies, teats, towels, bras, etc in Milton and wash at 60C - wash baby?s hands regularly - wash your hands after feeding or touching your breasts or baby?s mouth with anti-bacterial handwash - keep doing this for at least 7 days after symptoms disappear Don?t use lansinoh cream or apply breast milk to your nipples as they create the perfect environment for thrush to breed. We have been using the daktarin for nearly 9 weeks now and have had 3 courses of flucanazole but I still wouldn?t say that we?re 100% thrush-free? 5. Open Wound Healing Like many other mums, I had large open sores on my nipples which bled and would not heal. Each feed reopened the wounds and they were impossible to heal. Expressing just made them worse for me. The only thing that has helped has been the Novogel pads (Novogel circular pads 7.5cm -http://www.fordmedical.co.uk/id4.html) which promote open wound healing by allowing the wounds to heal from the bottom up. I was told many times to keep my breasts open to the air to let them heal, but this was actually making them worse. There is credible evidence that the best way to heal open wounds (on nipples or elsewhere!) is by moist wound healing. There is information here: http://www.breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk/pdfs/moist-wound-healing.pdf At one stage I thought one of my nipples would never heal as there wasn?t much left of it at all. Although I?m not quite healed yet, after 5 weeks of wearing the novogel pads the open wounds have healed to the extent that they no longer bleed, the sores are no longer what I would call ?open?, I can touch them without screaming (!) and I?m hoping (!) that eventually the skin will grow back. 6. Other bacterial infections We all carry bacteria on our skin which is harmless, but when you have open sores then the bacteria can cause untold problems. There are bacterial infections which are common in breastfeeding mums with cracks and sores on their nipples and which need to be treated with antibiotics to clear them up and allow the skin chance to heal. I had one infection ? staphylococcus aureous ? which was picked up by a swab done by one of my GPs and treated with strong antibiotics. The only symptom I had to show that there was this bacterial infection (in addition to the other problems) was that one of the open sores had yellow puss (gross sorry?!) from time to time. If you are having any pain and have open sores I would suggest asking your GP to do a swab. It won?t necessarily pick everything up (they rarely pick up thrush) but it should tell you if you have a bacterial infection which needs antibiotics. WOW...that was longer than I intended! If any of this helps even one person then the time it has taken me to write it over the past week in between feeds and playtime and Baby Knomester's current daytime-sleep-strike then I will be very happy :-)

Congratulations Moos and great news on getting the right diagnosis for Twosling! I really hope it goes well for you on Tuesday - just remember that you are doing the right thing. My story is pretty much identical to anna_r's (I know as we've chatted about it recently!), but sadly after nearly 6 weeks post-tongue tie snip we're still not out of the woods. It is, however, a MILLION times better than it was and I can breasfeed without crying (most of the time)!!! I have been writing some advice to post on the forum for the past few days (it takes forever trying to write a bit at a time as I'm sure all you mums can imagine...) based on our experience so I'll try to finish it and post it today. I'll link it to this excellent thread. What I still can't get my head around is the wall of silence when it comes to breastfeeding. Those of us who choose to breastfeed do so because we think it's best and everyone encourages us to do so, but noone (not even, certainly in my case, our mums until they see the pain we're in...) tells it like it is - it isn't always easy and can be horrendously painful and distressing. And if it hurts it doesn't necessarily mean you are doing something wrong... One thing I would disagree with is the use of Lansinoh cream in all cases. Although it may help with cracked nipples it also creates the perfect environment for thrush (and other infections) to breed and once you have those infections, until they clear up (with treatment) they cracks and sores will not heal.

I have had similar a few times with baby Knomester and the main thing I found that helped was eating a lot more calories during the day - a big breakfast, mid-morning snack, main meal at lunchtime and another snack in the afternoon - plus drinking a lot of fluids. I've also found that when Baby K is windy he asks for food as he doesn't know what's wrong, so often in the evenings it seemed like he was still hungry when in fact he wasn't. We also discovered pretty early, that he was tired in the evenings when we thought he was just being grizzly, so started putting him to bed earlier and earlier until he started going at 7pm. I feed him at around 5pm ish and then again around 6.30pm ish just before bed and this now (fingers crossed!) sees him through until around 4am. He's going through a growth spurt again now, so feeding for a bit longer to up his supply and I'm giving him as much as I can at each feed early in the day when I perhaps have a better supply. Hope this helps a bit.

I had 4 or 5 including a pretty aggressive one at King's at 42 + 1. Sadly none of them worked and neither did the acupuncture, long walks, etc, etc. I truly believe a baby will come when he/she is ready. For Baby Knomester that wasn't until 42+4 by c-section - he just wasn't for coming!

Ceri who lives in East Dulwich makes beautiful cakes to order so she might be able to help. She is on the ED forum and you can also contact her by email at ceridwenolofson@ymail.com She puts photos of some of her creations on her blog - http://bakeuntilscrumptious.wordpress.com/

As others have said, the trains from HOP to LB can be packed. I haven't noticed much reduction in commuters on the LB trains since the ELL was introduced, but I am travelling a bit later at the moment to make sure I get a seat whilst heavily pregnant so can't comment on the earlier trains. You will definitely need to be near the back of the train (near the stairs) to have any chance of getting a buggy on a peak time train, but generally there is room. On the way home I think it depends on the train you are catching and whether you are early for that train (or the platform is displayed in good time). The LB-HOP trains are just as packed in the evenings, but if you get there say 10 mins before your train leaves and head for the far end of the platform there is usually more than enough space. Try asking on the SE23 forum - http://www.se23.com/forum/ - which covers HOP.

On the subject of your concerns about your children being close I wanted to say that even if you and your brother aren't so close, it doesn't mean your children won't be... My mum and her brother aren't particularly close and rarely speak (although get on well when they are together). I am the eldest of 4, 3 girls and then 1 boy (who everyone expected and probably secretly hoped would be a girl). We're quite spread out in age (I'm 18 years older than my brother) but all get on really well. We don't get to see each other very often as we all live in different corners of England, but keep in touch and love it when we get together. I'm expecting my first baby in August and my brother (who has just finished his GCSEs!) is coming down to stay in a couple of weeks to help me with jobs and have some time away from the parents. I'm amazed that at that age he wants to spend a week with his 'old' sister, but he genuinely jumped at the chance and I can't wait for him to arrive so we have some quality time together!

It's also worth bearing in mind that Mothercare will sometimes match online prices for new purchases. We found the cheapest online price for the pram / buggy / car seat we wanted and Mothercare on the Old Kent Road matched that price which meant around ?130 saving off their normal stock prices. It's always worth asking if your brother and sister-in-law decide they would like to buy new.

I do pregnancy yoga with Sitaram at King's hospital on a Saturday morning - Jo Harrison who takes the class is very good. They also do evening classes at Brockwell Lido as someone else mentioned. I'd definitely recommend Jo's class on a Saturday!

Great news Michelle!