Lochie

Yes, I do this a couple of times a week from Cromwell Road! Takes me half an hour at 7am to drop kids at nursery on Turney Road. I'd cut down Cedars Rd off Croydon Road and turn right onto Clock House Road to avoid traffic at Beckenham roundabout. Then up past Homebase in Penge to crystal palace, and down College Road to gipsy hill roundabout, then down alleyn park to avoid traffic on Croxted Road. To make it even quicker you could take the toll road on college road. It's not a bad run but looking forward to not having to do it from sept when kids start school in Beckenham. good luck!

Also - my personal fave - Alfie and Annie Rose. Some of the stories have quite a lot of text. We have a big story book with lots of their tales in and its a fave over here: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Alfie-Annie-Storybook-Picture-Books/dp/0099750309/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1407136561&sr=1-1&keywords=alfie+and+annie+rose

BST - have you tried Captain Pugwash? Not gender neutral at all! But great for a pirate lover and they are a bit longer/wordier than the usual toddler books. In my experience enjoyed by girls as well as boys ;-)

Thanks everyone and thanks bawdy-nan, that is really interesting what you say. Growing up we went to France every summer (all over inc. Dordogne) and I remember how boring I found it as I rarely heard an English voice! It must have changed quite a bit. I'll look into Lot. What we really want is a nice gite/villa/apartment with a pool. Anywhere in France with lovely scenery and food. So any recommendations would be appreciated. Doesn't need to be Dordogne (but fine if it is!)

Has anyone got any suggestions of great places to stay for a family of 4? (kids aged 3 and 5). Also, best way to get there? Drive or fly? Much appreciated :-)

Thank you Pickle. That is so useful to read. Gave me a little lump in throat! My son absolutely loves roaming around on his bike (with stabilisers!) so we have started to think that we need to build on the things he loves doing and gently giving him more physical challenges in those areas (e.g. no stabilisers!). I guess my main fear is him being alienated when he starts school - we are due a home visit from his new teacher and TA early Sept so that is a good tip to mention it to them then.

Am wondering if anyone else has/has had experience of nervousness in a 4 year old boy (5 in September), and if so if there are any things I can do to help build confidence? My son is socially confident but when it comes to the physicalities of being 4 he is very reluctant to participate. Examples include not wanting to go on bouncy castles (he?ll sit on the edge but that is about it), not wanting to go on a very easy twisty slide in the playground (which my 2 year old daughter tackles with glee), not wanting to go fast/high on swings, being frightened if it rains (to the point that he sometimes cries). I don?t want to push him, and I always reassure him but tell him to do things in his own time and reward him when he does take a brave step (for him). However, I must say I am really nervous myself about him starting school in September ? not the social side but the physical side of being with 120 four-year olds who may not be so sensitive to his nervousness. Has anyone experienced this? Is it something that is grown out of or should we be proactively trying to sort it out now whilst he is still young? My husband is great and is a positive, adventurous role model to him so not sure why he is so very very nervous!

http://www.villapascali.com/ We went here last year (2 families) and are going again this year (my family and my parents). It is good for 2 families/extended families as it has a 2 bedroom annexe in addition to the 3 bed main house. Villa is great with big pool, all inflatables etc/toys already there, beautiful surrounding scenery in a lovely part of Mallorca. Under an hour's drive from Palma airport. Mallorca is only 2 hours flight from Gatwick. The local beach (5/10 min drive) is great for kids and has very clean water (I have a 2 and 4 year old). Pollenca is lovely and has loads of great restaurants. It is owned by a forumite - ceebeebee. I would very much recommend this villa (hence reason we are going back!)

Hi ceebeebee! our local park in Beckenham has a water paddling pool - much like the one in Ruskin Park. Water is very clean. Its quite a bog standard paddling pool (not as sophisticated as Myatts Fields/Brockwell) but my kids loved it yesterday when we went. The park is called Croydon Road Recreation ground and is probably a 20 min drive from ED http://becrec.net/

Thank you so much for all the suggestions and experiences. I didn't realise that about the hormone. In case anyone is interested I found this quite useful, and now realise to a certain extent it is a biological thing: http://www.webmd.com/children/features/bedwetting-causes My son really is deeply asleep when I 'lift him' which in a way is why I think he won't wake to go for a wee in the night as he rarely stirs til morning. When I put him on the loo at night he is still asleep! I may do as Etta suggested and keep lifting him bar a few nights every month to 'test' to see if he is making any progress. By the way if anyone hates the faff of changing sheets at night i've found quite a good way of making things as easy as possible - I layer these http://www.drynites.co.uk/products/drynites-bed-mats/?id=004 with a cot bed sheet on top (they are usually big enough to tuck underneath both sides of the bed) - if the bed is wet I just have to remove the cot bed sheet and the mat, leaving a fresh cot bed sheet and mat underneath. Helps avoid having to strip and wash several single bedsheets...

Would appreciate some advice on 'lifting'! My son is 4.5, we got rid of his night-time nappies about 6 months ago. He has done really well, only occasionally having an accident now. We have always relied on lifting him to do a wee whilst he is asleep, at about 11pm at night. He then typically goes the whole night through til morning. Does anyone know when to stop lifting? The times we have stopped/forgotten, he has wet the bed, so he definitely now depends on being lifted to stay dry! In a way I feel like we have conditioned him and am not sure how he will last the whole night without it. Or is he too young to go the whole night without it? Any thoughts would be appreciated :-)

Hi Sicilia, i've been with Elmlodge pretty much my whole life (bar 7 years when I left London in my late teens/early 20s). My parents are still with them, my husband is now with them and my two children too. They have provided consistently great GP care to my entire family. Really easy to book an appointment with them (both online and on phone). We all really rate Dr Nour and Dr Gordinsky. All doctors and nurses have been very good with my children too. If you can get on their books I would definitely go with them.

I read quite an interesting comment, I think from Polly Toynbee, in the papers recently. She said something along the lines of 'most women have one less child than they would actually like'. That really rings true with me as despite having a boy and girl, with the youngest at just over 2 I now find myself feeling broody and somehow (HOW??) forgetting how horrible I found pregnancy and the postnatal period with both children. I think number 1 nearly did me in and number 2 was a happy (in hindsight) accident). I do think it is quite typical though to have less children than you may like, my Mum wanted 4 and had 2, my mother in law wanted 3 and had 2 boys. My husband and I rather amusingly have a recurring conversation, most weeks, at about 9pm at night, glass of wine in hand, kids in bed, where we both remark on how lovely the kids look sleeping, and we both comment that maybe we should have another one. I then get rudely awakened at 5.30am each morning and think that I must have been ridiculous to say such a thing and quickly remind myself how much I hate early mornings and general lack of sleep. I am also worried about the physical effects of a third bout of hormones. I was so surprised after number 2 to find how awful the toll was on my body after 2 children (bad back, non existent pelvic floor strength, bald patches on my hair line that have never grown back!!) - in a way I am too scared to have a third in case I end up completely bald and incontinent!

Hi Canela, I lived in Brighton for about 7 years after Uni and still work down that way about once a month. A lot of the people I work with move further along the coast - Southwick, Shoreham - am sure they are relatively dull but they are right by the sea and attract the crowd from Brighton/Hove who want more house for their money. Commute not great though. I know Lewes quite well, am very fond of it, I think its beautiful and an amazing place to bring up kids. If you are thinking Haywards Heath I've heard the Lindfield part is meant to be the nicest and good for families. And the commute from HH/Burgess Hill is better than from Brighton. Having done the commute from Brighton though I would say that if you get on at any point after Brighton you will not get a seat on the way into London in the morning - therefore you would need to consider if you want to spend 45 mins standing up each morning, every morning. Good luck

Hi there, I moved here nearly a year ago. I have a 2 yo girl and 4 yo boy and would be happy to meet up to share tips. PM me if interested. Lochie x

I second Luxury Family Hotels. We went a few years ago to Ickworth House and it is amazing: http://www.ickworthhotel.co.uk/ The only holiday we've been on which I think was relaxing for both parents and children! It is expensive - probably cost about ?1k including food for 3 nights....But that included 2 massive interconnecting rooms. Think you can do it cheaper as there are self catering options at these hotels?

have you tried jigsaw puzzles? My son really got into these for a while and got very good at them, and he would spend a good half hour doing the harder ones....

Hi Ole- I also have a 4.5 year old boy, he is a September birth and for the last 4/5 months I would definitely say he NEEDS to be at school. I have got to a stage with him where I know I can't satisfy his energy/inquisitiveness/need for play/stimulation anymore!!! At first I felt a bit sad about this as our little pre-school days are coming to an end, but now I can't wait for September to roll on!! In terms of our current week - he goes to nursery 2 days, has another very stimulating day with my parents, and I take him and his sister to a wide array of play dates/play groups on the other 2 days. But as you say, the minute I try and do householdy stuff he usually winds his sister up/becomes difficult. The weather is also a factor as we have had too many movie/ipad days recently and I really know I need to take him out all day to tire him out. So no - it's not just you and we are in the same boat!! I figure in a few months time the weather will be warmer, so I can't wait to plan trips outdoors before he goes to school in September...

Thanks BST that is useful. Made me quite sad reading it though :-( Good tips on not going off with adults without parental permission, quite a simple way of getting message across

No I don't think strangers are dangerous at all and in fact I do quite enjoy this level of interaction between stranger and child, it usually makes people smile and makes me smile too! My main issue I guess is if I am e.g. in a playground and looking after my younger daughter too, have my back turned for a few minutes, and then he is gone. I know there is only a remote chance of that ever happening, but I guess there is an age that kids get taught that going off with anyone unknown is actually the wrong thing to do. My son doesn't know that. Thanks for all the thoughts. My instinct was actually to hold back on the stranger danger chat as yes in no way do I want to make him neurotic at such a young age. I probably just need to install a tracking device in him for those instances when I can't watch him all the time and he wonders off! ;-)

Advice appreciated, not an urgent issue but one that I'd appreciate some thoughts on! My son is 4 and a bit. He is very sociable and in public places e.g. supermarkets, will randomly say hello to strangers, tell them his name and age and ask them their name etc. This is happening more frequently, and though I don't want to quash his love of chatting to people and general people confidence, at some point we'll need to discuss not going off with strangers or generally approaching strangers. He is never far from my side, hence reason why I've never really mentioned this to him before. I know his default response will be why if I tell him not to do it. He is due to start school in September, so really I'm wondering if anyone can tell me: 1) Is stranger danger part of national curriculum, and if so at what age? Perhaps I can wait to have this chat with him if its raised in a age appropriate and non scary way at school? 2) Have you managed to have this conversation with a child yourself without scaring them, and if so, how? I did start to tell my son last week that he should not really talk to strangers unless they talk to him because not everyone wants to be disturbed and was about to tell him also that not everyone is a 'goodie' but stopped myself as I don't know if 4 is too young to share that side of the world! Any sharing of experience would be appreciated....

Wow some great tips I hadn't thought of thank you. I'll probably get a cheapy hard one and nicer soft body one, am sure to can never have too many dolls!

Unicorn school and Marian Vian in Beckenham also have good reps and not on your list so maybe worth trying...

My daughter will shortly be 2 and I'd like to buy her a doll as she always flocks to them at playgroups. She already has a ragdoll which she doesn't play with, she seems most keen on the plastic newborn baby ones! Any recommendations? John Lewis focuses on the Baby Annabell and the Baby Born ones. Is it worth paying more for interactive features or is that just a waste of cash (and batteries!). Thanks :-)

Hi Mucky72, I moved to Beckenham about 8 months ago and my parents live about a 5 min drive from KCH in Herne Hill. I regularly drive from Beckenham to their house and it would take about 20 mins without traffic (in case you are thinking of call outs in night), 30 mins with traffic. Lots of great schools in Beckenham, we are renting a nice house in Balgowan School catchment which is lovely. Also Highfield in Bromley and Clare House in Beckenham have fantastic reputations. If you live Penge end of Beckenham there are 2 buses that stop right outside of KCH (though unsure how long journey would take, probably 40 mins in traffic). When looking for schools I was also looking around the Herne Hill/ W Dulwich area, not just Beckenham, and would strongly recommend Rosendale School, about a 10 min walk from Dulwich Village. Jessops School in Herne Hill(that area is just a short walk across Ruskin Park to KCH) also got an outstanding ofsted report last year. Good luck!